A Song of Misty Mountains
by ErinacchiLove
Summary: A very important map has been stolen from the dwarves and they must get it back. Only there are limits to the company to retrieve it - and traveling through Middle-Earth with a Company of three dwarves, three humans, a hobbit, a wizard and a demigod (and three direwolves) might be the most insane thing in the history. (Ensamble cast, reviews appreciated.)
1. Chapter 1

This is a story that popped in my head right after I'd seen The Hobbit in January. I originally wrote it down in Finnish but since I like to practise my English skills, I've started to translate it to English. I'm bloody slow at translating, so don't expect any regular updates (especially since I haven't finished with Far Longer Than Forever - and to be honest I haven't even finished writing this one in Finnish quite yet, I'm in chapter 17).

This is a crossover of The Hobbit, A Song of Ice and Fire and also Percy Jackson and the Olympians, but PJatO will only be present through one character, so the main fandoms used are The Hobbit and ASOIAF. And while were at it, this story takes place about a year after Battle of Five Armies (I deliberately ignore Tolkien's ending because I love Fíli and Kíli), shortly before the events of a Game of Thrones and around the same time as The Battle of the Labyrinth. So it's bound to be AU for The Hobbit and ASOIAF, not so much of PJatO (you'll see in chapter two why).

And this will be very slowly developing Bagginshield, just to warn you. (Because there is no such thing as too much Bagginshield!) But the pairing will not be the main thing for great many chapters. This fic is more about adventure, friendship and loyalty.

Please enjoy!

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Chapter one

Where Unexpected Guests Arrive to Winterfell

~..~

It was snowing in Winterfell. Arya Stark was hiding behind a barrel and waited until her brother Robb came out of the stables. Arya threw a snowball she'd just made straight at her brother's shoulder. Robb looked at it, grinned and bent over to roll a couple of snowballs himself. Arya wouldn't get out of this so easily. With an experienced manner Robb threw a ball behind the barrel.

"You missed!" scoffed Arya, but not for long, for when she stuck her head up from the protection of the barrel, the next snowball hit her straight to her face.

"Revenge!" laughed Robb and threw another snowball. Arya laughed as well and soon the siblings were in a full snowball fight. At some point Jon came to help Arya and together they ran their elder brother down.

"Do you give up?" asked Jon when Robb's clothes started to be extremely wet.

"I give, I give!" Robb shouted and laughed. "How dare you go against your own brother!"

"I dare because I can't leave a young maid in distress", Jon joked.

Robb wiped the melted snow off his face and shivered a little. On her behalf, Arya was so tired that her legs gave in and she fell on the ground, panting.

"Well, it really hasn't snowed in ages", stated Jon. "That's quite fanny, we're still quite up in the North."

"Oh, I am so thankful that I don't have to be at the Wall right now", sighed Robb. "There must be a thousand degrees cold and six feet tall piles of snow. Right, let's go inside to dry up before any of us catches cold."

The brothers helped to get Arya up and together they started to walk towards the bathrooms. They weren't able to take many steps when they heard knocking from the gate of Winterfell. The siblings looked at each other. Winterfell wasn't expecting guests, not at that moment. As much as the warm bathrooms tempted him, Robb had to stay to meet the visitors, since their lord father, Lord Eddard Stark, wasn't present. Robb ordered the gates to be opened. The visitors were absolutely unexpected, and none of the three siblings could hide their astonishment when they saw them.

The guests were Dwarves.

The oldest of the Dwarves was clearly the most prestigious. His hair and beard were black and he was dressed in all black, except for a silvery belt, where hung a silvery sword. The two younger dwarves looked like each other well enough, so they must have been brothers, even though the other had blond hair and beard and the other was a brunet. They were dressed in dark green, brown and dark blue. None of them looked like the only dwarf to whom the house of Stark was used to, meaning Tyrion Lannister, but they clearly were Dwarves. All of them were shorter than Robb and Jon by several inches, but they did top Arya in height.

"Fíli and Kíli, at your service!" said the younger Dwarves in unison and bowed.

"Robb, of House Stark, pleased to meet you", answered Robb after recovering from the slight shock. "May I inquire your business here?"

"We are looking for three members to our company", said the oldest Dwarf. "My name is Thorin Oakenshield."

Robb bowed and Jon and Arya followed the example. Eddard Stark had taught his children by experience that they were to be polite to all the visitors. Bowing wasn't always necessary, but Robb, Jon and Arya saw that Thorin was a very important person, and as such they were to bow to him.

"Please come in, I'll see that my father will meet you", said Robb and beckoned the dwarves to enter the castle's yard. "Oh, before I forget, these are my sister Arya and my brother Jon."

Jon pointed out that Robb wasn't referring to him as "half-brother". It felt nice compared to Sansa who always made clear that Jon wasn't her flesh-and-blood brother. On the other hand Robb and especially Arya had always treated him as though he were their real brother, much for Lady Catelyn's nuisance.

Robb sent Arya to find Lord Eddard. Arya grimaced because she would've wanted to stay and get to know the visitors better, but she did obey her brother. Luckily her father wasn't far off. He was in the assembly hall discussing with Jory Cassel and Vayon Poole. Arya slammed the door open. She had run the whole way to get back as soon as possible.

"Arya!" shouted Ned. "What is it? Good gods, you are all wet!"

"Father", panted Arya. "Guests. At yard. Now. Hurry!"

And Ned Stark practically flew from the room. He told Jory and Vayon to come with him, and Arya to go change her clothes. Arya left with them anyway, even though she was bothered by her wet clothes. She wanted to see her father's face. At some point Nymeria joined her. The direwolf nibbled Arya's fingers a couple of times and licked her whole hand. Arya smiled and sank her hand into Nymeria's soft fur.

Ned's face truly was worth seeing when he met Thorin, Fíli and Kíli. It was exactly seeing that face why Arya hadn't said who the guests were. Her happiness was short-lived when she found out that the dwarves had already told her brothers the further meaning of their visit. Arya found it extremely unfair. She grimaced at Robb (and Jon, though he had done nothing) in irritation. It was their fault that she had missed all the details.

When the Dwarves had told on what business they were there, Ned ordered Jory to tell the kitchen staff to prepare more food for dinner. Ned preferred negotiating over dinner because it was the easiest place to keep the guests happy. Especially Fíli and Kíli didn't seem to mind a good meal. None of them seemed to mind that they had to leave their weapons in the entry way.

Ned introduced the dwarves to the rest of his family. Catelyn welcomed them quite warmly, taking that she usually was wary of visitors, Sansa was looking at them with a suspicious gleam in her blue eyes and Bran and Rickon were peeking behind their mother shyly. The atmosphere became more relaxed when Robb, Jon and Arya returned after washing up and changing into dry clothes.

"So, to what purpose do you need three members to your company?" asked Ned from Thorin when they had started the dinner.

"A map, very important to us Dwarves, has been stolen from us", Thorin told him. "It wasn't until a few months back when we got to know that it can be searched and found only a company that consists of three Dwarves of House Durin (meaning my nephews and me), three of the race of Men, a Hobbit, a wizard and a half-blood, whatever that means. And these humans must come from outside Middle-Earth, Mahal knows why."

"Oh, right", said Ned, pondering the words. "I can very well suggest –"

Ned's answer was covered with laughter as Arya and Jon laughed at something Fíli and Kíli had told them. Arya laughed so much that she nearly fell off her chair. Thorin glared at his sister's-sons to make them fall silent, and Ned did the same to his children.

"So, I can very well suggest some people of my household to join you", Ned cleared his answer. "We have many good soldiers here."

"Father, I and Jon would like to go", announced Robb. "It would be an honour to help."

"Robb…" Catelyn began with pained voice, but Ned gestured her to remain silent for a moment.

"My son, it can be very dangerous", he said. "You are my heir. There is no way I can ever let you go on that journey."

"I can go on Robb's behalf!" Arya exclaimed.

"No, you can't", snapped Sansa. "You are a girl."

"What of it?" Arya demanded. "Girls may just as well go on adventures!"

Catelyn sighed deeply. "Arya, on this matter your sister is right. You are a lady and thus you are to remain home."

"But that's not fair!"

Ned silenced his daughter with a strict glance. Arya stared at her meal, eyes in tears. Nobody ever took her with them when it was about an adventure. The reason was always her gender. It was the most ridiculous excuse since the Targaryen reign! Jon tried to console her, but a try was all he could manage. Arya had decided to mope the rest of the evening, and she was good at moping.

Catelyn glanced at her husband. "Jon can go, I don't have anything against it, but Robb, you cannot. You are the heir of Winterfell."

"And Bran is the next in line if I happen to fall", said Robb. "Father, Mother, I want to go."

"And I wish to stand by my brother's side", added Jon.

Ned Stark let out a deep sight. He did not want either of his sons to go and possibly meet their makers, at least not whilst Bran and Rickon were still so young. On the other hand they both were volunteers, and nobody in Westeros had a habit to deny giving volunteer help to those who were in need of it.

"Very well", said Ned finally. "Master Oakenshield, here are two members to your company."

"Brilliant!" Kíli exclaimed. "This is going to be fun!"

"Kíli!" said Thorin sharply. "This will not be a picnic. Although we are not reclaiming Erebor again, it does not mean to take this mission lightly."

Kíli looked down in embarrassment. Fíli patted his shoulder and said that uncle would relent soon.

"It is settled then", said Thorin to Ned. "We shall leave as soon as Robb and Jon have done their preparations."

Arya got up from the table and ran to her room without waiting for being excused. She did not want to see Robb and Jon leave, not when she couldn't go with them. She slammed the door shut and curled on her bed. Nymeria pressed herself to her side, warm and soft as always. This time the warmth of the direwolf just didn't console her at all. Arya felt envious towards the boys. The lads always got to have fun and she had to, as a girl, grow numb while cross-stitching. Had anyone ever even come up with something duller than cross-stitches?

"Nymeria, the world is the most unfair place", whispered Arya to her direwolf. Nymeria pressed her muzzle against Arya's arm and licked it gently.

Suddenly someone knocked the door.

"Arya, open up!" shouted Jon. "Come on, open! I've got something for you."

Arya rose up reluctantly and opened the door for Jon and Ghost. Bloody lucky wolf, of course he'd get to share in an adventure, Arya thought bitterly. Then she started to pay attention on a longish package in Jon's hands. Jon gave it to his sister and asked her to open it immediately.

"We don't have much time", said Jon. "I have to been at the yard very soon."

Arya tore up the wrapping and her mouth fell open from both happiness and surprise. There was a sword in the package. It was small and light when Arya tried, so in other words it was just fine for her.

"I asked the smith to forge it earlier today", Jon told Arya. "I thought of giving it to you on your name day but I realized that you needed it now."

"Sansa is going to freak if she ever finds out", giggled Arya. "It's wonderful!"

"Learn to use it whenever you have time. Talking about time, it's time for me to go."

"Wait! Does it have a name?" asked Arya. "The best swords always have names."

"Of course it has", grinned Jon. "It's your favourite item."

Arya stared at her brother for a while before she understood what he was chasing.

"Needle!"

Jon hugged Arya and ruffled her hair before running to the yard Ghost behind him. Robb, Thorin, Kíli and Fíli were ready to go already.

"I suppose Arya's not coming to say goodbye", Robb stated as Jon arrived without their younger sister.

"No", answered Jon. "She's too crushed. Well, shall we?"

Robb and Jon said goodbye to their parents and siblings (though Jon only said it to Ned, Bran and Rickon because he knew that Lady Catelyn and Sansa weren't too fond of him) and Thorin promised to bring the boys back in as good health as it was possible. Ned said that he would understand if it weren't possible. "This is their choice, and if the gods decide that their time has come, there is nothing anyone can do about it."

"Don't worry, Father, I shall look after Jon", Robb promised.

"Oh really", said Ned. "Then who will look after _you_?"

"Jon", answered Robb and made Fíli and Kíli laugh.

"Right", Ned sighed. "Jon, promise me that you will not pick up a fight with anyone, not even if you were provoked a lot."

"I shall do my best", said Jon and bowed to his father. Ned smiled and patted the shoulder of his bastard son.

"You will be fine", he said, but most likely he tried to assure himself of the matter rather than boost his sons' confidence.

Jon and Robb said goodbye once more and then left for the journey with the dwarves. Jon had a nasty feeling that this would be the last time he'd see Winterfell like he knew it. What a foolish thought, of course he and Robb would return to Winterfell looking just like this. The roofs would be covered with snow and the whole castle would be just as cosy as ever. They could travel to the world's end for all Jon knew but Winterfell would always be their home. They would return home eventually. Father would meet them with warmth and love, Lady Catelyn would dote on Robb, Sansa would roll her eyes at the whole business, and Bran and Rickon would be swarming around them, wanting to know everything of the adventure. And Arya… yes, Arya would probably still be bitter that she wasn't allowed to join them. Jon sighed deeply, took one last glance of Winterfell and then left it behind him.

Arya had watched the departure of her brothers from the window. In her anger she had already impaled a pillow with Needle. Mother and septa Mordane would let her hear of it. Arya took a breath and thought. The family and the servants would most likely return to their duties and daily missions. That meant that Arya had to carry out her plan soon or she would get caught. She had changed her dress to clothes which would cause her mother and Sansa a heart failure were they to see them: a long fur cloak on the top of a waistcoat, linen shirt and trousers. She had also changed her regular shoes to firm travel boots. Arya had stuck Needle to her belt and hidden it under her cloak.

"Nymeria, remember to be very silent", Arya told her direwolf who seemed to understand what her mistress wanted her to do. She shut her mouth and got down from the bed silently like a shadow. Arya smiled at her before digging some parchment, ink and a quill from her drawer. She had a message to her family, one she couldn't orally deliver. Arya wrote more quickly than ever, and it could be spotted of the quantity of ink spots. She left the letter on her bed, took her backpack, opened the door of her room and sneaked out with Nymeria. The hardest part would be to sneak out of the gates but with any luck nobody would be there to see her…

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Oh, and before I forget, please inform me if any of the characters start to go OoC and tell me how to fix it.

And I do not own anything you can recognize to be the property of J. R. R. Tolkien, George R. R. Martin or Rick Riordan. I'm merely playing with their lovely characters.


	2. Chapter 2

A quick update, wasn't expecting it. Apparently I translate faster than I imagined. Anyway, I like this chapter a lot. Please enjoy :)

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Chapter two

Where They Add a Stowaway to the Company

~..~

Kíli didn't remember when he had last met a human who was such delightful company. Jon asked all these things about the Dwarves' lives and Fíli and Kili were more than happy to answer his questions. It was fun to chat, and in addition Jon was a great listener. He never interrupted, on the contrary, he was just as silent as his direwolf named Ghost. Fíli and Kíli had been a bit frightened of the direwolves before Robb and Jon had assured they were perfectly trained and would behave just fine. "They don't attack unless they're told to", Robb had said, "and we hadn't thought of making them attack you." Ghost was actually quite cute (if his red eyes weren't counted in, an albino as he was) when he learned to trust. Even now he was walking between Jon and Fíli and from time to time his tongue touched Fíli's hand softly, and it made the dwarf smile a lot.

Meanwhile Robb was discussing with Thorin. His direwolf, Grey Wind, was the polar opposite to Ghost. He was quite noisy, at least he was there and then, and there was no way he could be described as cute even though Kíli did give it a shot. He was dire and that was final.

"By the way, where are we exactly heading to?" asked Jon.

"At first we're going to a friend's house and we'll decide how we go on with the quest once we're there", answered Fíli. "I can't wait to see who Gandalf has recruited to this company this time."

"Knowing Gandalf he or she won't seem like a warrior at first glance", stated Kíli. "But if we can take something for granted it's the fact that whoever Gandalf picked they're bound to be brilliant."

"Who's Gandalf?" asked Jon.

Kíli and Fíli couldn't believe their own ears. They had never met one soul who didn't know who Gandalf was. Fíli grinned a little and said that Gandalf was only one of the greatest wizards ever to dwell on earth.

"He's very eccentric", Kíli added. "Comes and goes as he pleases. But he's also very loyal and a close friend to Uncle Thorin. Even if Uncle says he's also a complete nutcase, which you mustn't tell Gandalf when we see him."

Jon didn't ask more so the answer had most likely been a good one. They were now some miles from Winterfell, close to the inter-dimensional gate Gandalf had created for this purpose. Travelling through it was not pleasant at the least. Kíli and Fíli had been forced to lean to each other on the walk to Winterfell. Both had thrown up two times. Thorin hadn't liked the journey either but if he had felt sick he didn't show it.

Suddenly Ghost halted and sniffed the air. Grey Wind mimicked his brother. Robb glanced at Jon nervously but Jon remained perfectly calm, if still grasping the hilt of his sword just in case. Thorin, Fíli and Kíli didn't understand what was going on.

"What is it?" demanded Thorin.

"Just a second", said Jon with a grin over his face. He turned to the same direction as Ghost and Grey Wind and called, "Arya! I know you're there! Come on out, Arya!"

Robb rolled his eyes. "Jon, Arya is home. She's not so stupid as to sneak out and follow us."

Jon called for Arya a couple more times but no one could be seen. Grey Wind walked beside Ghost, both still sniffing the air. Robb and Thorin sighed simultaneously.

"There's no one there", said Robb.

"I'm not finished yet", snapped Jon. He put two fingers in his mouth and whistled. A grey direwolf, a bit smaller than Grey Wind or Ghost, ran from a bush nearby waving her tail happily. She was followed by a half sour and half defiant Arya.

"Traitor", grunted Arya to Nymeria who was happily greeting her brothers.

"I told you so", said Jon to Robb with a smug smile.

"Did you know that Arya would follow us?" Robb inquired.

"I guessed something like that."

"Well, be as it may, but she must go back", decided Robb. "She's too young to participate to anything this dangerous." Arya moved some of her hair off her face and tried to stand so that she'd appear very tall and threatening. It didn't work out very well because she was shorter than the dwarves by many inches.

"_I am not going back_", announced Arya. "I'm going on an adventure with you. Do you have any idea how dull it is to do cross-stitches or learn family trees by heart every single day?"

"Arya, this is dangerous", sighed Robb. "You are only ten years old and besides you're a girl–"

"Oh, so you're shunning me just because I'm a girl!" raged Arya. "It's unfair! I never get to do anything fun because I'm a girl! Girls want to go on adventures as well! We're not any worse than you boys are!"

"Arya…" Robb began but Fíli interrupted him.

"If you ask me, I think she might as well come. She's got spirit. And in addition to that she's small and can easily pass unnoticed. Besides, if Arya comes, we have just gathered the necessary nine people to the Company, right? Problem solved!"

"I agree with my brother here", said Kíli. "I, too, want Arya to join us. Uncle Thorin please, please, please, please?"

The brothers looked pleadingly at Thorin who was gauging Arya with his glance. Arya was very young and she _was_ a girl, and the right place for girls wasn't in dirty battles that tended to happen during adventures, but on the other hand she had managed to follow them with her direwolf completely silently and had been able to pass unnoticed. Not many could do that since Thorin could almost always sense when he was being followed.

"Very well", Thorin finally agreed. Kíli and Fíli punched their fists together and then ruffled Arya's hair. "But she must get a proper weapon and understand what this whole business is about."

"I've already got a weapon", Arya told them. Robb's eyes went wide for the astonishment.

"Where did you get that?" he asked when his sister drew a lean and light sword from her cloak.

"Jon gave it to me before you took off."

Robb glanced at his half-brother. "So that's why it took you so long."

"Guilty", chuckled Jon. Robb shook his head muttering something about siblings and how they unnecessarily stood up to him, but he didn't manage to sound entirely disgruntled.

Thorin stepped before Arya. He was a bit taller than she was but not by much. "Do you understand what you've got yourself into? My nephews call this an adventure, irresponsible as they unfortunately are." Thorin glanced at Fíli and Kíli who developed a sudden interest in the clouds above them. "But this is not a fun little picnic from which you can comfortably return home in front of a fireplace. Anyone of us can be killed at any point of this journey. We are bound to get orcs and goblins against us and I dare you to find creatures viler than them. And you cannot just leave this quest if you become scared. Do you understand me?"

Arya nodded energetically. "I wasn't expecting this to be safe, I never did. I just wanted to come along because I'd rather die for a good cause than continue living with a needle and a piece of fabric in my hand. Who does it even benefit if I learn to cross-stitch perfectly rather than fight with honour?"

Since no one answered her, Arya assumed the reply to be "nobody". Thorin asked to see her sword, so Arya gave Needle to him as formally as she could. Thorin examined it very carefully from the hilt to the pointy end.

"It's extremely simple, but it's light and in perfect balance", he said finally. "You may want to congratulate your smith when you meet him next time. You should be perfectly capable of killing some orcs and goblins with this, Arya."

Thorin handed Needle back to Arya and something close to a smile passed on his face. Arya bowed because she felt that curtsying felt sort of weird.

"By the way, do you have any idea how to use it?" asked Thorin suddenly.

"Well, actually… no", Arya admitted and blushed. "I do know that you stick them with the pointy end, though."

"My nephews must teach you, then."

"Of course we will!" exclaimed Kíli. "We'd be happy to."

A relieved smile spread on Arya's face. For a moment she had been afraid that she was going to be sent back home for her inexperience in sword fighting.

"Come, Nymeria, let's go!" said Arya and the six of them got going again. Gandalf's gate was very close, might have been a mile if even that. The walking was not enjoyable and the terrain was difficult, but Arya wouldn't complain. A couple of times she tripped over the rootstock, but it didn't slow them down since Jon, Fíli or Kíli was always ready to get her up. The direwolves loved this longer-than-normal walking trip. They probably saw this as some sort of a fun trek.

"If I fall over one more time", grumbled Arya after falling over this time to the rootstock of a pine tree, "I'll curse all these damned trees!"

Fíli helped her up. "I wouldn't do that", he grinned. "One never should make curses lightly. You'd only regret it afterwards."

Arya couldn't help but smile.

"Hurry!" commanded Thorin. "We are almost there."

There truly was less than a hundred yards left. The gate Gandalf had made could already be seen. It was only a silvery circle on the ground but Robb, Jon and Arya understood that it was some sort of powerful magic. Robb and Jon left wondering for a short while if this was smart, but they knew that it was too late to regret.

"Come on", said Kíli. "We're starting to get late." He nodded to Arya. "Maidens first."

Arya made a face. "What's in the other side?" she asked.

Kíli only answered, "The Shire." And Arya had to make do with that. She took a moment to gather her courage and then she stepped into the circle with Nymeria. They had hardly stepped in the middle when they disappeared. Robb and Jon followed them with their direwolves. Then went Fíli and Kíli covering their mouths with their hands so that they wouldn't get sick on anything. The last to step into the circle was Thorin who checked one last time that they weren't being followed. He landed into a bumpy pile with Jon, Arya and Nymeria under everyone else.

"This", grumbled Jon, "was without a doubt the most uncomfortable journey I've ever been to."

"Well, you are finally here", said a voice somewhere above them. The weight on Arya and Jon was lifted when the dwarves got up to greet the one who had spoken. When Robb, Jon and Arya managed to got up on their feet, they realized they were standing face-to-face with an old, tall man. The man had a long beard, a grey robe and a pointy hat, and also a long wooden staff in his other hand. This was Gandalf the Wizard without a doubt. The three of them greeted him and bowed politely.

"They certainly aren't lacking manners", Gandalf chuckled. "I knew I sent you to the right place", he added to Thorin.

Gandalf introduced himself (even though it was quite unnecessary) and thanked the siblings for volunteering to take part in the quest.

"The pleasure is all ours", answered Robb. "I am Robb of House Stark, and this is my brother Jon and my sister Arya. We also took our direwolves Grey Wind, Ghost and Nymeria because we couldn't leave them at home in Winterfell."

"That's quite understandable", said Gandalf. "I think they might prove their usefulness in this journey."

"Gandalf, is everything ready?" asked Thorin with natural poise.

"But of course. I found a very skilful ninth member to our Company. She is waiting for us in Bag End with Bilbo."

"I hope they haven't started to dine without us", Kíli said to Fíli.

"You just ate", sighed Thorin.

"We didn't eat much", assured Kíli. "We left some empty space just because Bilbo is a terrific cook."

"You two are impossible", Thorin said but he said it so fondly that no one could mistake him to be scolding the lads.

"Let us go", said Gandalf. "Bilbo is expecting us already."

Robb and Jon checked that they hadn't dropped any of their equipment before the seven of them (and three direwolves) took off. The evening was old so one couldn't really make much out of the scenery but Arya saw that the place was full of grass and small trees. Here and there were little houses and doors in the sides of hills. All and all the place was very lovely and homely. Arya only left wondering why everything looked so small. Maybe dwarves dwelled there.

Only when the company passed a house the master of which was cutting the grass Arya understood that no dwarves dwelled there. The master of the house was about the same size as dwarves but was of more delicate build and had no beard. Arya couldn't say what the creature was but he did look friendly. Friendly and astonished, to be exact. The company admittedly was most likely the strangest ever seen in the Shire. And the walking with the direwolves wasn't that nice since all those who were outside backed off quickly as they passed.

"Gandalf, what are these tiny beings?" asked Jon.

"Why, Hobbits of course", answered Gandalf. "Weren't you told of them?"

"I guess we weren't listening that closely", Jon admitted in embarrassment.

"A Hobbit…" Arya tasted the word in her mouth. It sounded about as lovely as the Shire looked. For some reason it made Arya very happy.

"Ah, we're here", Gandalf announced and made the company halt. They had arrived close to the top of a small hill with a door painted in green. On it's both sides were plaid windows with light coming out of them. The garden looked like it was well taken care of and it was full of bushes and flowers, some of which were completely unknown to Robb, Arya and Jon. It hardly was a surprise, though. Winterfell was so up in the North that nothing ever bloomed there.

"Bag End", said Gandalf. "You better leave your wolves outside. Bilbo is very careful of his furniture."

Fíli and Kíli snickered at this like it was an inside joke. Robb, Jon and Arya agreed to do so. When they were at the other side of the gate, they simply said, "Stay" and left the wolves outside to lie on the soft grass. They didn't seem to mind.

Gandalf knocked the door with his staff and soon a Hobbit with curly reddish blond hair. He was very neatly dressed and seemed good-natured.

"Bilbo Baggins", said Thorin and for the first time a true smile crossed his face. Bilbo's smile only got wider from what it had been.

"Come on in, I've got the kettle on and some potatoes getting ready", he told them.

"Excellent", grinned Kíli and entered right after Thorin. Fíli did the same after greeting Bilbo properly. Gandalf introduced Robb, Jon and Arya before they, too, entered the hole.

It was warm inside Bag End. The evening wasn't particularly chilly but as they were used to the climate of Winterfell and the usual coolness of the rooms there Arya, Jon and Robb were surprised of the warmth. Bag End was homely furnished and smelled of good food. Arya's stomach started to make noises even though her last meal had only been a couple of hours ago. Bilbo led them to a inset that apparently was some sort of a dining room and where Thorin was already sitting as if it were his home. The voices of Fíli and Kíli could be heard from the kitchen where they apparently were making a huge mess of everything. In the table also sat a girl of about Jon and Robb's age who looked like she didn't know how she had ended up there. It probably was close to the truth. The girl had short ink black hair, bright blue eyes and freckles on her nose. She was wearing the most peculiar clothes: a silvery jacket with a black shirt under it, black trousers with chains hanging from them, and shoes with terribly long laces.

"This, my dear Company", Gandalf introduced, "is Thalia Grace."

* * *

It's Thalia! She's my favourite character in PJatO, plus she makes a good counterpart to Thorin. You'll see in future chapters what I mean.

And I can just imagine Kíli making puppy eyes when pleading to Thorin xD He's adorable!

And I like Arya, just wanted to add that.


	3. Chapter 3

Sorry for taking so long, I was writing the original Finnish version further and got carried away (plus I was also writing Far Longer Than Forever). Anyway, here's chapter three.

The journey begins, and so does the fun. Oh, these nine (plus three direwolves) are gonna have so much fun and pain during this loooong adventure. I'm just saying, Bilbo must be out of his mind leaving Bag End like that again. And so must be Robb, Jon and Arya. Thalia didn't have much choice, really.

Hope you like this one as much as I do :)

* * *

Chapter three

Where They Are Woken in a Very Uncomfortable Manner

~..~

"Just Thalia will do, thanks", said the girl, sounding a bit nervous. Jon could easily understand it. It was just natural to be nervous if you had just ended up to a place you didn't know in the middle of people you didn't know either.

"So, this is the half-blood", said Thorin. Thalia nodded and cut the steak in the plate in front of her.

"I'd very much like to know why I'm here", she said before putting the piece of steak in her mouth. "Gandalf said that I'm needed to find some map."

"I'd also like to know the further details", said Bilbo and placed a big kettle of potatoes on the table. Kíli and Fíli brought the chicken wings and the sauce (Bilbo had managed to save his kitchen before the brothers had started a food fight) and sat right next to Thalia.

Thorin began to tell, "Our mission is to find and retrieve the map of Moria, which is most likely stolen by the Orcs. The map is extremely vital because it is impossible to navigate perfectly in Moria without it."

"Which means we get to kill a bunch of Orcs during the journey", stated Thalia. Thorin nodded with a low grunt. Thalia smiled devilishly. "Sounds like an excellent way to pass time to me. The Orcs won't be able to tell what hit them."

Arya put a chicken wing on her plate and thought that Thalia must have been some sort of a professional warrior. She certainly seemed like one but she didn't possess the calm demeanour Arya had seen in the knights of Winterfell. Thalia was somehow restless.

"We shall leave tomorrow first thing in the morning", Thorin continued. "We'll pass Rivendell from the south and turn there to south-east for Moria. The Orcs who stole the map most likely dwell there. They wouldn't have stolen the map if they weren't going to…"

The rest of Thorin's sentence was again covered with laugh. Thalia and Arya were laughing at a tale Fíli and Kíli told them of their last adventure. Jon wasn't completely sure whether to laugh or not because Thorin and Robb seemed so disapproving. The girls didn't seem to notice it.

"And then", Fíli wiped off the tears of laughter, "and then Bilbo told the trolls that we had a lot of parasites. And we weren't aware that he was trying to play time, so of course we yelled that we so didn't have them. Uncle Thorin luckily realized it and he kicked Kíli."

"No damn way!" giggled Thalia. "Oh I wish I had been there to see it!"

Jon had to bite his lower lip to prevent himself from bursting into laughter. Robb glared at Arya who seemed unable to control herself. Bilbo, on the other hand, had to cover his mouth with his sleeve so that nobody would've seen him laugh. He'd also started to recall the unlucky encounter with the trolls. At that moment he had felt like he was going to die there and then. Luckily the morning had come soon enough and the Dwarves had understood his attempt to play time (and luckily Gandalf had saved the day). It had been quite a close call but it was a happy ending all the same.

"If you aren't too busy to retell all about the former stupidities", growled Thorin, "I'd be very grateful if you bothered to listen to what I'm talking about. This widely concerns you as well."

Kíli and Fíli blushed and wouldn't say another word until Thorin had told everyone what he had on his heart, "The Orcs wouldn't have stolen the map if they did not intend to use it."

"Sounds reasonable", said Bilbo. "But what are they looking for in Moria? Wasn't that mine abandoned a long time ago because of… what was its name again, because of Durin's Bane?"

"Yes, but they say that you can still find _mithril_ there", answered Thorin. "The Orcs know how valuable it is and they wish to take over the mines before us Dwarves."

"And we'd better reclaim the map before they get to use it, eh?" Thaleia summed it up.

"Just so."

Thalia took a sip of tea and said, "Well, that's it then. Count me in this mess. I'm in even though it's most likely the most insane thing I've ever done."

Bilbo rose from the table and went to kitchen to fetch the dessert puddings (some of which were all over the walls thanks to two dwarves who shall not be named). Arya went to help him because she was able to get up from the table without having to cram herself. The puddings smelled of vanilla and slightly of raspberries. After taking the portions to the table Arya went to give Nymeria, Grey Wind and Ghost some food.

"I suppose we need to take the wolves in for the night", said Jon. "I mean, surely we aren't planning to take off in the middle of the night?"

"No, we aren't", answered Thorin. "We shall leave at the first light of morning, and _no dawdling_."

"Um, at what part can I start to train with my sword?" asked Arya when she returned from the garden.

"We'll teach you on the road, as often as we have breaks", Kíli promised. Arya smiled at him and sat back to the table to eat her pudding. It tasted just as good as it smelled.

"Bilbo, this is really good", said Jon. "I can't remember eating pudding as delicious as this."

Bilbo blushed for the joy. His cooking skills had been praised many times before but the praises felt just as good each time, especially if they came from someone who hadn't eaten his dishes before. Everyone else seemed to like the pudding as well.

"I agree with Jon", said Fíli. "You've exceeded yourself."

After the dinner Arya and Thalia helped to clean the table. In other ways Thalia didn't seem to be feminine at all but she was good at doing the dishes. Bilbo said he was very thankful for it. Apparently there had been a total chaos in Bag End last time the Dwarves had visited him. "Thirteen Dwarves and Thorin was the only one with at least moderate table manners", Bilbo said. "I still wonder how none of my china got broken that evening."

"We Dwarves are so exceptionally skilful!" Fíli shouted for an answer.

"Oh, indeed!" answered Bilbo. "Then why can't you behave yourselves?"

Robb and Jon went to get the direwolves in for the night. Their size created a slight problem: Nymeria fit in the hallway so that she wasn't on anyone's way but Grey Wind and Ghost were so big that nobody really knew where they could sleep. Finally Thorin realized that they could place Grey Wind in the library and Ghost in the drawing-room because they were the biggest rooms in Bag End. Bilbo wasn't too thrilled of the idea but he eased up when Jon and Robb assured that they would keep the wolves under control and wouldn't let them harm his furniture.

* * *

Arya woke the next morning to the noises and the smell of toasted bread that came from the kitchen. For a while she didn't remember where she was but it came back to her when she saw Thalia sleeping in the bed next to hers. Arya grinned as she saw how Thalia's legs hung over the edge of the bed. The guest rooms of Bag End were very nice and homely but they weren't designed for humans. Arya got up from her bed and went to the kitchen. It was very practical to be a small ten-year-old; Robb and Jon (and Gandalf, goodness gracious) had to be cautious all the time, minding their heads, but Arya didn't have to duck every once in a while.

It was almost hot in the kitchen. Bilbo had two kettles, one for porridge and one for tea, on the stove. Thorin (who had woken up about half an hour before Arya) was helping Bilbo by making sandwiches. They were talking about something that Arya didn't hear because Bilbo made so much noise with the pans, kettles and forks.

"Good morning", said Arya and stepped inside the kitchen.

"Oh, good morning Arya", smiled Bilbo. Thorin grunted something that nobody could figure out but it didn't really sound unfriendly.

"Ha, for once I woke before my brothers", chortled Arya. "Can I help at something?"

"Sure", answered Bilbo. "Could you go to the pantry and fetch some salted pork? You don't have to bring it all."

"Salted pork, I'm on it."

When Arya returned Gandalf was sitting on the opposite side to Thorin and they were discussing about something she didn't quite catch. Not that it actually mattered because it didn't sound very important, that is, until Thorin spoke to Arya.

"I just told Gandalf and Bilbo how you followed us yesterday", said Thorin. "Not everyone has a talent like that and Gandalf just managed to convince me that you are just the right person to this company."

Arya placed the plate of salted pork to the table and bowed to Thorin. "Thank you for those words", she said, "and also for allowing me to accompany you."

"We need people who can pass unnoticed in this quest", said Gandalf. "We already have Bilbo but it is always better to have two."

"It's nicer to me, too", said Bilbo. "I don't have to take care of everything alone."

Then Thorin happened to glance at the kitchen watch that said it was half past five. He gave Arya two lids of kettles that Bilbo didn't need at the moment. Arya tried not to burst into laughter.

"Oh you can't be serious."

"I sure am", assured Thorin with a devious smile. "Those five better learn not to dawdle."

Arya left the kitchen with the lids. Bilbo gave Thorin a disgruntled look. "Isn't that a tad too cruel?"

"They can only blame themselves for not waking up at time", said Thorin curtly. Then began ungodly noise because Arya was banging the lids together as loudly as she could. Gandalf and Thorin were the only ones who remained unbothered. Gandalf ate porridge as if there had been no noise whatsoever and Thorin continued packing up the sandwiches.

"What in the name of Hades's panties?!" screeched Thalia. "Arya!"

"Sorry, I got the order from above", Arya apologized to her.

Thaleia gritted her teeth threateningly. "I'm gonna murder that blasted dwarf."

Kíli and Fíli had dropped from their beds due the noise and had now come out of the guest room still almost asleep. It was repeated when Jon and Robb came out of their room. They both looked so tired that they could just drop dead. The direwolves weren't especially thrilled of the noise either but each of them would've woken up in a couple of minutes anyway. Jon went to open the door of Bag End so that the wolves could stretch their legs. The sun hadn't risen yet and the company was meant to take off by seven o'clock.

"Bloody…" Kíli swore in Khuzdul.

"Who taught you that?" asked Fíli. "I've never heard a curse as foul as that."

"I should think so. Dwalin taught me that one."

"I might've known."

The breakfast was over in ten minutes so that everyone would have time to pack up and wash themselves if they felt they had a need for it. Bilbo shared the supplies so that everyone had roughly the same amount. Jon, Arya and Robb bound their fur cloaks over their rucksacks with leather straps. They wouldn't need them before Misty Mountains. The Company had agreed to head east until they'd turn to south-east at around Rivendell and then head to Misty Mountains which would be the tricky part of the journey. The roads were treacherous and weather merciless. Thalia had had her rucksack at the ready since last night but now she got all her weapons out of it so that they were on her reach at any time. The rest of the company just didn't understand why the items closest to her were a bottle she called "pepper spray" and a chain bracelet until she demonstrated the reason. The bottle was actually a spear of a respectful size and the bracelet turned into a shield.

"The shield's called Aegis", Thalia told the Company after having a good laugh at their shocked expressions when they saw the shield. "They forged the image of Medusa to it to scare the enemies. And also for scaring the shit out of friends. The model is the same as my father's shield of the same name, just to mention it.."

"The orcs won't stand a chance", grinned Kíli when Thalia put the shield away. Then they were ready to leave. Thorin put the map of Middle-Earth to Fíli's rucksack and told him to take care of it. They couldn't afford to lose another map.

The first rays of sun peeked from the horizon when they left Bag End. The whole Hobbiton was still asleep and would remain so for quite some time. The hobbits hardly ever woke early. The Company would make it to Bukland by afternoon if they kept the pace up. Bilbo hoped that the kettles he had with him wouldn't bang against each other too much because if the worst was to happen they'd create too much attention on the Company.

"I wonder what sort of a fit this will give Hobbiton this time", Bilbo said to Jon who was walking beside him. "I arrived home from my last adventure just about a year ago and that adventure took a whole year, too."

"What happened back then?" asked Jon, engrossed. "I mean other things than just trolls trying to eat you."

Bilbo told him about reclaiming Erebor and the fuss he had been forced to go through when he returned to the Shire. "The faces of the Sackville-Bagginses sure were worth seeing", Bilbo laughed.

"It sure would've been fun to see", Kíli giggled. "Pity we weren't there. I mean, if they had tried to mess with you any worse, Fíli and I could've persuaded and asked them to behave better."

"This would've persuaded", Fíli patted his sword, "and these would've asked", he pointed at his brother's arrows.

Meanwhile Thalia was telling mostly Arya about her life but also Thorin, Gandalf and Robb seemed to be listening to her. Nymeria was walking in between the two girls and really seemed to take to Thalia when she told about the close relationship the Hunters of Artemis had to wolves. The wolves were important allies to the Hunters as Thalia expressed it. Most Hunters had a natural gift for tracking but it was a lot easier with the wolves.

"May I ask what makes you a half-blood?" asked Robb discreetly.

"Sure", smiled Thalia. "I'm a daughter of Zeus, the God of Sky. My mom was a normal human. The official title to people like me is demigod but half-blood is widely used."

"Now hold on a minute", Thorin put in. "A daughter of a god? That is impossible."

"It sure as hell is not!" retorted Thalia. "You want me to prove it right here right now?"

"Yes, please."

"Please, not at the Shire", pleaded Gandalf. "Remember that we do not want to draw too much attention on us. When we are at a desolate place, in Old Forest at least, then you can prove yourself Thalia. Will this do?"

Thalia nodded while glaring at Thorin. Thorin glared at her in return. Arya and Robb both hoped that Thalia would not attack the dwarf king even though it started to look like it. Nymeria and Grey Wind broke the awkward silence by starting to bark at some poor squirrel.

"Nymeria, no!" shrieked Arya.

"Grey Wind, come here!" ordered Robb. "This won't do! We told you to keep it quiet!"

However, the direwolves had managed to stop the Glaring Olympians between Thalia and Thorin. The journey went on, if not pleasant then at least agreeable. They made it to Brandywine before Arya grew tired. She wasn't used to walk trips this long. Luckily Grey Wind was big enough for Arya to ride on his back. It wasn't especially nice but at least it gave her a chance to rest her feet. It didn't seem to bother Grey Wind. He ruffled his fur for the pride and carried Arya so proudly that Jon was forced to laugh.

"We should've taken the ponies", said Bilbo.

"They would draw too much attention", said Thorin. "It is better we move without them."

"And a little girl riding a direwolf _won't _draw attention?" snorted Thalia.

Thorin didn't even bother to answer.

* * *

Yeah, I love that parasite part. Kili is so adorkable.

And while everyone else in this fic use standard British English, Thalia goes with American English (because it'd be weird if she suddenly spoke with British accent). I know GRRM is American but I just picture the residents of Winterfell speaking something close to Yorkshire or even Scottish accent. ('Cause British accents = yummy!)

Actually before The Hobbit came out I pictured also the dwarves speaking with Scottish accent. Then there was Richard Armitage and his booming voice and bang! I had to update my headcanons.

... why do I babble about these things? This is written text, accents shouldn't matter!

And I think Thorin regards Arya as the younger version of Kíli, which is to say, a troublemaker he has to look after. He doesn't really mind, though. In my headcanon dwarves love children, and not just dwarflings but also children of other races.

Oh, and Thorin's first line is a modified version of "So, this is the hobbit" from the film. I didn't even realize it was there until I proofread the Finnish version and laughed so much I almost peed myself. It was so not intentional but it fit the scene, so I left it there.


	4. Chapter 4

Okay, quick update. I like it when they happen. So, the quest can now officially begin, and so can also Arya's training and... well, you'll see it then xD I like this chapter, it made me laugh many times as I re-read it (I know it's stupid to laugh at your own jokes but I can't help it). I hope this one will make you at least smile - and hopefully also enjoy it as much as I did when I wrote it.

* * *

Chapter four

Where Arya Takes a Stick's Measures

~..~

Bilbo did not like the Old Forest. The Company had managed to get there without being spotted by anyone but it hardly was a miracle of any kind. The Hobbits generally wouldn't go anywhere near the Old Forest if they could choose. It was rumoured that the old beasts of yore dwelled there. Bilbo had been there once before and knew that the place wasn't actually very dangerous but it wasn't nice or pleasant either. It was hard to walk there due the thick rootstocks and due the thick branches of trees there was hardly any light. Gandalf, Thalia and the direwolves were the only ones walking there with no specific problems. Especially Thalia's apt made Bilbo look at her in awe. The direwolves, on the other hand, seemed to like the forest. Grey Wind would leap over the rootstocks with Arya on his back from time to time and then look at Robb and Jon as if saying "try to beat that".

"Show-off", chuckled Thalia. Nymeria and Ghost wanted to prove that they weren't any worse than their brother and so they also started to leap over stubs and rootstocks. It was difficult for everyone to hold their laughter upon seeing it, especially when Nymeria fell off for a stub. She tried too long a leap. At that point even Thorin almost smiled.

"Oh, quit laughing!" Arya tried to snap at the others but she was trembling with laughter as well. She dismounted Grey Wind and went to see Nymeria. "Are you hurt?"

Nymeria licked Arya's had to prove that she wasn't hurt at all.

"Is she alright?" asked Thorin. Arya nodded. "Good. Let's move on."

They carried on for a couple more hours until it was so dark that no one could see anything anymore. Gandalf lit the tip of his staff and said that there was no point going on that day, since someone might just hurt themselves in the dark. As if it had been an assurance to the wizard's words, Fíli and Kíli stumbled and fell on Thorin. Thorin wasn't especially pleased.

"Sorry, Uncle", Kíli apologized to him and got up with his brother quickly. Meanwhile Thalia was digging her rucksack and was almost frustrated.

"I swear I put it here, now where the hell could it be…?"

"Can I help you?" Jon asked.

"Sure you could, but I think you don't know the item I'm looking for", answered Thalia.

"Then what are you looking for?"

"A flashlight."

"A what?"

"This", sighed Thalia and showed him a cylindrical item, one head wider than the other. She pressed a button on its side and the light was lit.

"What is this witchcraft?" wondered Robb.

"Trust me, Robb", said Thalia, "that if you lived in New York or somewhere else in the States, a flashlight would almost be an everyday item to you."

Every member of the Company besides Gandalf (because Gandalf was grinning in secrecy) was staring at Thalia, not understanding a word she said.

"Oh, just forget it. Let's gather some firewood and get a fire going."

Thalia gave the flashlight to Jon who left to find some firewood with Fíli and Kíli. While the three of them gathered dry branches and sticks, Thorin asked Thalia to prove her demigodishness. Thalia let out a snort, concentrated, turned her pepper spray bottle into a spear and thrust it towards the sky. Lightning struck and it thundered. Thalia gathered all the lightning's energy to her spear. The spear glowed eerie blue in the night. Bilbo thought of Sting, Orcrist and Glamdring. Thalia's spear glowed the same way they did when there were Orcs or goblins nearby.

"Fine, I believe you", said Thorin sourly but Bilbo could hear some reluctant admiration in his voice.

"Good", retorted Thalia. "If you'd still doubt me, I'd have my dad scorch you."

"Surely not!" cried out Fíli who had just returned his lap full of firewood.

"Well, no", Thalia admitted. "And I doubt Dad would do it even if I asked him to. He's too busy to be whipped by his wife, Hera."

Jon and Kíli returned a couple of minutes after Fíli. Jon didn't have as much wood as Thorin's nephews did but that was because he had the torch in his other hand. He gave it back to Thalia who slipped it into her belt so that finding it again wouldn't take forever. Bilbo got a fire going and suggested they'd eat before going to bed. The day had been a tough one and sleep was a welcome guest. Grey Wind, Ghost and Nymeria formed a circle around the Company. Arya leaned against Nymeria and yawned. She was easily the most tired member of the Company. Jon and Robb weren't especially awake either – they also leaned against their direwolves and tried to stay awake through the dinner. The Company camped near a small cliff that also provided some shelter from wind. Bilbo fried some eggs over the fire and offered them to Gandalf, Jon, Robb and Arya, and after that he fried some bacon to Thorin, Fíli and Kíli. Thalia said she'd only eat a few apples before going to sleep. Arya had hardly eaten her dinner when her eyelids fluttered and she fell asleep against Nymeria's side. Jon got up and tucked her in under his fur cloak.

"Well, Jon and I shall say good night now", said Robb, drew his own cloak over himself and fell asleep. Jon pressed himself against Ghost and did the same.

"That was quick", Bilbo commented.

"I suppose they just aren't accustomed to this amount of fresh air", said Gandalf. "I think this adventure will be very good for them. Fíli and Kíli, could you please stay in watch for a few hours?"

"Absolutely", the brothers answered unanimously.

"I can take my turn after you", promised Thalia. "Wake me up when it's time."

Then Thalia searched a sleeping bag from her rucksack, wrapped herself into it, curled up next to Arya and closed her eyes. Bilbo rubbed his eyes and said he'd go to sleep as well. He fell asleep against Ghost, and Gandalf settled himself against Grey Wind shortly after the hobbit. Thorin thought of it for a moment and then went to sleep next to Bilbo. Luckily Ghost was big enough to support three people, especially since Bilbo didn't take much room.

* * *

The Company woke up next morning to the fire that had gone out. Luckily it was still smouldering, so Bilbo said that they would definitely had breakfast. The breakfast was more filling than the so-called dinner because they decided to eat the sandwiches Bilbo had made. Each had different fillings but they all filled the stomach just fine.

"Can we practise now?" asked Arya enthusiastically. Kíli and Fíli looked at each other smiling.

"Sure we can", answered Fíli. "But you won't touch Needle just yet."

Arya put Needle back to its scabbard, disappointed. "But I thought…"

"We start with these", said Fíli and threw her a long and strong stick. "Were we at home in Erebor we'd borrow Dwalin's wooden swords but since these are the circumstances now, these sticks just have to make do."

"Don't you worry", Kíli said and patted Arya's back. "Fíli and I also started our training with wooden swords. And we flailed around with sticks a lot too. You can't really cause real damage with these, not the same way as with real swords."

Arya understood the situation and nodded. A wooden sword was the beginner's first weapon because it was hard to cause anyone damage with it, at least not accidentally. Doing it on purpose was a whole other business. With a heavy wooden sword one could cause a lot of damage, if they tried hard enough.

"Right, so what do I have to do?"

"Grasp the branch with two hands and hold it straight in front of you", Fíli advised.

Arya did as she was told. "And then?"

"Keep your arms in that position as long as you can."

"Excuse me?"

"How can you imagine you'll beat your opponent if your sword does it first?" sighed Thorin.

"Oh. Right, I get it", said Arya and straightened her arms.

"I can take time", offered Thalia and started to look closely at her wristwatch. When the hand was at the highest, she said, "Go!"

Arya put the stick (which was of honourable size and weight) properly in front of her with a tight expression. She breathed evenly and wouldn't let her hands waver for many minutes. Only at around six minutes' mark her arms wavered but she immediately corrected her position.

"Now there's someone with will", Gandalf murmured. "It looks good."

Thorin made an approving grunt while watching Arya. The girl really had more potential in her than the eye met.

"Wow, eight minutes", Thalia announced. "Well done, Arya!"

Arya's arms started to shake and in the end she had to drop the stick. Jon got it up from the ground and said he'd never seen anything like that. Also Robb looked at Arya with clear admiration and Bilbo passed her the water bottle. Arya waved her hands to make blood flow properly in them.

"Eleven minutes", said Thalia. "That's an excellent start."

"You should repeat this practice every time we have a break", Kíli advised. "When you can hold the stick for half an hour without arms wavering we can move on."

After that Arya's favourite moments on the journey were the breaks.

The Company continued the journey. After two days march they passed the village of Bree and no special shenanigans happened. Kíli shot three grouses for supplies and Robb managed to scratch his arm quite badly in a thorn bush. Gandalf took care of the scratches himself and no permanent harm was done. Robb still used quite a lot of delicious swearwords, some of which were the sort that made Jon block Arya's ears. That was no use, actually, since during the next break Thalia taught Arya even worse swearwords.

"And there passed Arya's last chance to behave like a proper lady", Jon joked when his younger sister was swearing while fighting with the stick. She could now hold her arms straight without wavering for fifteen minutes plus additional two minutes with some wavering.

"I think you're still a natural", praised Kíli when Arya dropped the stick once again. "Fíli and I could hold our sticks for fifteen minutes extremely straight when we started but after that our arms hurt like hell."

"True", echoed Fíli. "I mean this loser's arms hurt but I only had some slight cramp."

"No you didn't!"

"Well at least I didn't moan for hours how I could never use my arms again!"

"Do you really have to bicker about this again?" grumbled Thorin. "May I make a note that I was there when you trained and after the training you both whined like little brats."

Kíli and Fíli fell silent and wouldn't say anything for several minutes, which apparently was very rare. They went on again. Gandalf asked to see the map of Middle-Earth so that he could see their exact position.

"If we keep going on like this we will be around Rivendell this time next week", the wizard announced. Thorin muttered something vague but since they had no mounts the journey automatically went on more slowly. The good news was that this time they weren't obliged to stop at Rivendell. Thorin could not stand the host, Lord Elrond. Well, on the other hand he had yet to find the Elf he could actually stand.

The grounds began to change. They decided to skip the Midgewater by using the road. That would be the last time they'd use the road that journey. The terrain was open: there were no trees, the grass had gone yellow and the only objects providing shield were giant boulders. Gandalf, Bilbo, Thorin, Fíli and Kíli knew the area; they were at the Lone-lands, or Eriador, where they had done a great deal of running during their last adventure. None of them was very pleased to reminisce how the Wargs had chased them a little further away. Luckily this time there were no Orcs or Wargs whatsoever at sight. They probably wouldn't stand a chance against them with this squad, especially since Arya still didn't quite know her way around with a sword. They barely even talked. Thalia stopped for a moment to help Arya to get on Grey Wind and now walked beside them like a protective older sister. Robb and Jon were walking at the end of the queue with Ghost and Nymeria and spoke with low voices. Kíli and Fíli were right after Gandalf and Thorin who led the group, and kept a constant eye on the environment. Fíli, however, left pondering for some long moments if Bilbo glanced at Thorin more often than usually. Thorin did not seem to notice anything but that was just because he was, like his younger nephew, constantly keeping an eye on the environment for possible danger.

After a long march they decided to camp. The sun had set shortly before the decision and a good camping site was quick to find.

"Amon Sûl", said Gandalf. "Also known as Weathertop. We shall camp at its foot for the night."

There was a ruined fortress on the top of the hill that hardly raised any excitement, so they all agreed that they'd camp at the foot. Bilbo got a fire going and started to fry the grouses that Kíli had shot earlier for dinner. Thalia helped Bilbo where she could, which means she mostly chopped the carrots and potatoes. Bilbo had decided to make a soup.

"Well, I sure am getting hungry", said Robb after putting his load on the ground. "I never thought this quest would be so tough. Oh well, as the heir to Winterfell I guess I'd better have all kinds of experience."

"True", said Jon. He sat next to his brother and rubbed his belly. "Damn that empty spot."

"Try to cope", retorted Thalia. "Chicken must be properly cooked or the risk for salmonella raises clearly."

The rest of the Company stared at her as though she had spoken some foreign language.

"Oh, do you seriously claim you don't know what salmonella is?"

"Yes", said Thorin dryly.

Thalia sighed, "Salmonella is a bacteria that can be found for example in raw chicken. I can't remember what symptoms the salmonella infection had but it was something very unpleasant. Could it have been diarrhea…?"

They left the matter there and Bilbo continued cooking. Thalia added the potatoes and carrots she had minced and then concentrated on guarding the fire. Fíli and Kíli left for a short patrol and returned when the soup was ready. The brothers sat close to Arya. She was carrying on her training – she now could hold a stick for around twenty minutes without wavering at all.

"Can we soon begin the sword fighting itself?" asked Arya after dropping the stick and having taken a bowl of soup.

"Well, I think we could start the basics", said Kíli and looked at his brother questioningly.

"We'll start tomorrow", Fíli decided. Arya put her meal away and hugged the dwarven brothers.

"Thank you! Thank you, thank you, thank you!"

"Jon, may I correct you", said Robb. "_Here_ passed Arya's last chance to behave like a proper lady."

Arya grinned sweetly at her brothers. Thalia, Gandalf and Bilbo laughed and even Thorin made something that looked like a smile.

After the meal they agreed on the watching turns. Thalia said she'd take the first turn. Jon and Robb were the first to fall asleep against Grey Wind and soon after them Kíli and Arya fell asleep on both sides of Fíli so that the Dwarf prince couldn't move anywhere from there.

"Great, it's like I'd got a little sister in addition to a brother", stated Fíli and fondled Arya's arm.

"I think we'll go to bed as well", said Bilbo and leaned against Nymeria. She licked his cheek and pressed her head against the ground. Thorin settled himself next to Bilbo and Thalia coughed, "Get a room."

Fíli was the only one to hear it so he got up as much as he could. Then he checked that neither Thorin nor Bilbo heard anything and asked, "Do you also think that…"

"That those two have a major crush on each other?" Thalia finished. "Well yeah. It's so damn obvious!"

"Tell me about it", whispered Fíli. "Unfortunately I know both Uncle Thorin and Bilbo and they won't recognize each other's feelings even if they danced in front of them wearing the wizard Radagast's hat."

Thalia couldn't say anything to that since she didn't know what kind of a hat the wizard Radagast had, so she nodded curtly and whispered, "What should we do?"

"I don't know but we have to make up something."

"Ah, my favorite kind", Thalia giggled. "Making it up as we go along. We're bound to have a whole lot of weeks to try a little of everything to get his Majestic Grumpiness and Bilbo together."

Fíli smiled at Thalia and said he'd go to sleep now. The hunter returned the smile and said she'd keep an eye on the camp. She turned her pepper spray bottle into a spear already now, so that under danger she'd only have to open up Aegis. It would most likely be enough to repel enemies, it was certainly a shield terrifying enough for that.

* * *

And so Thalia was converted into shipping Bagginshield xD

When I wrote this one I had to check the symptoms of diarrhoea (it's with the O in British English that I use but Thalia uses American, so...) and where you can find it but to be honest I don't remember them anymore. Well, neither does Thalia so I guess no harm done xD

And Arya's practice with the sword was borrowed from the amazing book series called Young Samurai by Chris Bradford. It seemed like something they'd also do in this universe. But I know for a fact that beginners use wooden swords. You really can cause harm with them if you really want to, at least if they're heavy. Syrio Forel did :)

And from now on Thorin will be known as His Majestic Grumpiness or some other variation.


	5. Chapter 5

Hello again and thank you for the favs, follows and reviews. Here's chapter five for ya. The lyrics used are from the song "Touch the Sky" from the Disney/Pixar film "Brave". I claim no authority over the song, all rights belong to their rightful owners. I only added it because I like the song so much.

* * *

Chapter five

Where They Find Out a Little Bit of This and That of Thalia's Rucksack

~..~

Next morning Thalia woke up to the coldness. Robb, who had taken the last turn, was trying to get the fire going but with no such luck. As he was very inexperienced in camping stuff, he couldn't say what was wrong but he kept trying. After some time he finally gave up and threw the matches to the ground in frustration. Thalia and Thorin took a closer look at them and said they had got wet during the night.

"Sod it", grunted Robb.

"No worries, I have spare matches", Thalia consoled. "A Hunter is always prepared. And in addition I also have a lighter, if we run out of matches."

For her luck nobody even bothered to ask what a lighter was. The Company was more interested in breakfast. They had the left-over soup from last night for breakfast. It was cold but it gave them energy, so nobody complained. The direwolves had some raw ham and water. Luckily they didn't need much food if it came to that. Gandalf told them that this area hardly had any game. The next area where they would be able to hunt was the Trollshaws about fifty miles from Weathertop.

"If we walk quickly we may arrive there by nightfall", said Gandalf and got up. "Pack up the ware, so we can leave."

And so another day of the journey began. The sun hadn't even risen properly. Bilbo and Arya had slept poorly so they were allowed to ride Ghost and Grey Wind. Kíli, Fíli and Thalia remained the last of the pack so that they could speak in peace without being suspicious. Jon raised an eyebrow a bit but he let it be. Fíli told his brother a summarized version of what he and Thalia had talked of last night and Kíli couldn't help but smile in his mischievous manner when he heard that Thalia agreed with them.

"I warn you that I'm not used to get couples together", said Thalia. "So if I mess up, it's due my inexperience. But I can throw some nice implying comments."

"Thalia, I think we're going to have a very good time in this journey", laughed Kíli.

Fíli and Thalia also burst into laughter and gathered some dubious looks from the other members of the Company. Arya had heard a part of the conversation but hadn't understood much, and she couldn't even ask Robb or Jon about them since she didn't know what she was even supposed to ask. Her brothers hadn't heard anything so they only looked at each other with confusion. It was hard to tell about Gandalf but his smile told everyone he knew something they didn't.

"They really do not understand the seriousness of these circumstances", huffed Thorin, giving his sister's-sons and Thalia a disapproving look.

"Can you blame them if they don't want to think of the dangers that lie ahead?" Bilbo defended the youngsters. "I think you're a bit too harsh, Thorin. We've both seen Fíli and Kíli in battle, they do know their responsibilities."

"I only fear that Thalia gets bad example."

"I think she's like that by nature", Robb put in. "Never forget that she's taught Arya some words so bad that I didn't even think they would exist."

"Oh the cock of Tartarus!" shrieked Arya as if to confirm Robb's words. She had accidentally dropped Needle on the ground and frightened that it would be damaged.

"What did I just tell you?" sighed Robb. "I'd be more worried that Thalia will be a bad example to Fíli and Kíli."

"You may have a point there", Thorin admitted. "Our last quest showed me, though, that Gandalf never chooses anyone with no use whatsoever to the companies. I do not like this but since I trust Gandalf's judgement, I also trust that Thalia will prove her value to us."

"Thank you for the evaluation, Thorin", said Gandalf. "But you do not have to speak as though I am not present."

Thorin grunted something that sounded like an apology, but one could never tell with him. Even in his best days he was hard to read. Bilbo and Gandalf had grown used to it but Jon and Robb had to admit that it was starting to get a bit irritating. On the other hand their own father wasn't the easiest sort of a person either. Robb decided to switch the subject so he asked about Erebor and how the life was there. The subject clearly pleased Thorin because he gave a longer answer than any of those he had given the past few days. He did describe things in a gentler manner than what Fíli and Kíli would have. The Dwarven brothers always got too enthusiastic at some point. It was in their blood.

Arya moved Grey Wind so that he would walk beside Fíli, Kíli and Thalia because their previous conversation still bothered her. It bothered her so much that she could hardly concentrate on riding Grey Wind, so she decided to take the bull by its horns and ask.

"What did you talk about?" asked Arya. "And please, don't answer that I'll understand when I'm older. I hear enough of that sort at home."

"Oh, gods, how can we explain this…?" sighed Fíli.

"If I give it a shot?" Thalia suggested and turned to face Arya. "Okay, Arya, we've discovered that Thorin and Bilbo have some clear feelings for each other. By this I mean feelings, the sort what your father feels to your mother. Do you understand what I'm saying?"

Arya nodded.

"Good. Well, we discussed of the whole thing and agreed that Bilbo and His Majestic Grumpiness will never realize they have feelings for each other if we don't give them a hand. And now we're making up some plans to get them closer."

Arya had never before thought if two men could love each other the way a man and a woman did, but now that she thought about it she came to a conclusion that why not. She had never heard any discussion of the matter at Winterfell – or if there had been any, then she must not have been there then.

"I think I understand", said Arya tentatively. "But I don't understand with what ways you, uh, assist them."

"We have to come up with the ways", answered Kíli, "and preferably during this trip. Just guess how painful it is to watch how Thorin has his eyes on Bilbo but doesn't do anything."

"I still support the insinuating comments", said Thalia matter-of-factly.

"By the way, what does it mean, the thing you said last night?" asked Fíli with interest.

"You mean, 'Get a room'?"

"Exactly."

"Well, in my home land, The United States, people say that to a snuggling couple or to two people who clearly belong together. What they mean by it is that the couple should go somewhere else to snuggle. It's more often than not used humorously and as a joke."

"Oh I wish they'd heard it", sighed Fíli. "I would've wanted to see Thorin's face."

The four of them got a good laugh of the mental image. Grey Wind let out a loud bark, for he didn't like that they laughed right under his ear. Arya stroked the back of his neck and apologized to him. After that she slid off his back, saying that he had enough energy to walk. The brisk weather had awakened her enough. The same could not be said of Bilbo. The poor hobbit was still very tired.

"This won't strain Ghost, will it?" Bilbo asked from Jon worryingly.

"Not at all", answered Jon. "Ghost is a tough one."

Ghost sneezed as if to confirm the words.

"Fine, fine, I believe", Bilbo said to Ghost. "I was a bit scared of these direwolves of yours at first, but they are quite nice, actually."

"They've managed to give a fright to the bold men of Westeros' Kingsguard as well", said Robb proudly. "I remember how one member of the Kingsguard asked our father how he dares to let the wolves be near us children."

"Father replied quite seriously, 'Because the children need proper babysitters'", added Jon with a nice imitation of Ned Stark's voice. "And they have been very good babysitters. Our brother Bran almost got lost once to the woods near our home but his direwolf led him back home."

"How many children are you?"

"Five, and then me", said Jon. "I don't officially count for a Stark because I am Father's bastard son. Robb is the eldest, then there is Sansa who is two years younger, then Arya, after Arya there's Bran and the youngest is Rickon who is three."

"And you all have direwolves?"

"Exactly. Sansa calls hers Lady and Rickon named his Shaggydog. Bran hasn't named his just yet, says he can't make up a good name for him."

It was almost evening when the Company halted. They could still see Weathertop in the horizon and about fifteen miles in front of them they saw a bridge that Gandalf called the Last Bridge. "When we cross it, we arrive to the lands of the elves. After the Trollshaws we turn and pass Rivendell." Robb and Jon seemed quite disappointed when Gandalf talked about passing. They had secretly hoped to see elves. Bilbo slid down from Ghost's back and started to prepare dinner. Kíli offered to go to the Trollshaws to hunt but Thorin strictly forbade it. They had enough food for the day and Thorin wouldn't let either of his nephews to go to the Trollshaws without someone looking over them.

"If I go with them?" suggested Thalia. "I'll keep an eye on them."

Thorin huffed. "Then who will keep an eye on you?"

"Arya, of course", said Thalia with a straight face.

"Not a chance", said Thorin curtly. Thalia made a face but decided to give it a break and help Bilbo with the dinner.

"Well, we could start practising the swordplay", Kíli said to Arya. Arya made a yell of joy and took up her stick. Fíli and Kíli had also taken two sticks from the Old Forest for this purpose. They played scissors-paper-rock to decide which one would teach Arya first. Kíli won and started to teach Arya with a smug smile.

"Let's get the basic position right first. Stand steadily on your both feet and hold your sword right in front of you, like this."

Arya mimicked Kíli's position the best she could.

"Keep your back straight and bend your knees a bit, not that much!" Arya corrected her position. "That's better. Right, we better go through some basic methods that work in most situations."

Arya repeated the moves Kíli showed with utmost care. Fíli and Thalia were whispering something while the latter seasoned the potatoes Bilbo had chopped. Kíli had a nasty feeling they were laying bets on how he'd succeed with the practise. On the other hand Arya seemed to be a real natural. It wouldn't take a moon until she could be trusted with a real sword.

"That looks very good", Kíli praised and Arya smiled proudly. "Would you like to try a match?"

"Sure!"

"Don't beat yourselves to bruises, either of you", Thorin told them without raising his look from the map of Middle-Earth, which he, Gandalf and Robb were studying. Jon and Ghost had left for a short patrol.

"Of course we won't", answered Kíli as if it had been so obvious. "I'm going easy on her."

Even if Kíli went easy on Arya could've easily told otherwise. Blocking the strokes was harder than it looked. Kíli shouted her advice while Arya tried to concentrate. In the end after a couple of very precise strokes Kíli managed to disarm Arya.

"And now you're dead", he said with a grin. "Want a rematch?"

Arya nodded. She was in need of revenge – and also got it, in a way. After a couple of strokes and blocks Kíli hit Arya painfully to her thigh because of which she let out a cry of pain.

"Sorry!" exclaimed Kíli immediately. "It wasn't my purpose–"

Arya hit her stick to Kíli's side shouting, "For Winterfell!" Thalia and Bilbo had to stop cooking for a while because they couldn't hold back laughter. Fíli laughed so much that he fell over on his back. He really started to like Arya a lot.

"Good Mahal, Kili", said Thorin with mocked scold. "Shame on you! To lose to a little girl!"

"Someone get this beast off me!" yelled Kíli but he had to laugh as well. "Arya! Stop it!"

"Do you give?"

"Yes!"

Arya got off Kíli only to be tackled herself. This time Kíli had a more effective attack, tickling to be exact. Arya let out a shrill scream and tried to struggle her way out but Kíli was strong.

"That doesn't look like swordplay to me!" laughed Fíli.

"For Erebor!" Kíli shouted while wrestling with Arya. At that point not even Thorin could retain his poise.

Jon and Ghost returned from the patrol, both hungry, but they were disappointed. The meal was nowhere near ready. Arya and Kíli were rolling over the ground trying to hit each other with sticks (which they had started to use again) and the rest of the Company laughing at them hysterically. Jon gave them a more than irritated look.

"What the devil is going on here?"

"Well, as you can see", answered Fíli after getting a hold of his chortling, "Arya and Kíli are trying to beat each other into pulp."

"Shouldn't someone stop them?" asked Jon just as Thorin rose and went to separate the two younglings before they hurt each other any worse.

"What did I just say about the beating?!"

"Arya started it!"

"I'm not interested in who started it! Because I'm ending it now!"

Thorin truly ended the fight. He even confiscated Needle from Arya and all of Kíli's weapons. Neither of them was satisfied with the solution. They did get their weapons back after the dinner because the _valar_ knew that the Trollshaws were dangerous. Thorin also said that he'd breathe more easily if they all were fully armed when passing through the lands of the Elves.

"Thorin, the Elves aren't _that_ bad", Bilbo sighed.

"Quite true", replied Thorin. "They are worse."

Bilbo rolled his eyes. Talking about creating too strong prejudices against the Elves to Thalia, Arya, Robb and Jon. Bilbo didn't bother to start arguing of the matter, though. Gandalf wouldn't participate to the argument in any way whatsoever and Fíli and Kíli would back up their uncle as they always did.

The sun had almost set beyond the horizon when they reached the Trollshaws. They decided to go on until it would be completely dark and camp at the edge of the forest. If any trolls happened to attack, they could run away more easily. Bilbo, half joking, offered to use the parasite trick again if they got caught. For some reason the Dwarves weren't too thrilled of the idea. The night fell so quickly that they didn't even reach the halfway of the edge of Trollshaws, hardly even a quarter. They decided to camp there.

Somewhere far off thunder struck.

"Riiiight", mumbled Thalia. "I better dig up my tent."

"What?" blurted Robb. "Do you have a tent?"

"Yes, but I only use it if I really don't have other choices."

Thalia stuck her hand deep into her rucksack and dug a tent that was on a roll and beanpoles from there. The tent didn't look like much but Thalia assured them that it would endure rain, wind thunder and mudslides. Robb and Jon helped her to put it up. They could only find one problem.

"How do we all fit in it?" asked Arya.

It was an extremely good question. The tent looked like it could only support two (three at maximum) members of the Company. Thalia laughed as if she had known something the others didn't and waved them to enter.

"Just go in, you lot."

Bilbo and Arya went in first and after being in for about two seconds they stuck their heads out grinning like Thalia did.

"We'll fit this thing just fine", Bilbo announced. "This is somehow bigger inside."

"Excuse me?"

"Come on in, Thorin!"

Thorin glanced suspiciously first at Thalia who was poorly trying to stiffen her laughter and then at Bilbo who waved him to enter.

"Oh, just be stubborn then", snorted Kíli and stepped inside the tent followed by Fíli. The tent truly was somehow bigger inside. It could easily fit ten or eleven full-grown Men if need be. Upon hearing this Thorin, Robb and Jon went in with the direwolves. Gandalf and Thalia remained outside for a moment because Thalia said she'd set up some traps and Gandalf would show her light.

"If even one troll tries to assault us, he'll fall into a mine field", Thaleia mumbled to herself. It didn't take longer than ten minutes to set up the traps and Thalia didn't even bother to do thorough work with hiding the explosives. It was lucky trolls were bloody stupid.

"How in Durin's name can this tent be bigger inside?" Thorin wondered.

"That I unfortunately can't answer", answered Thalia apologetically after entering. "I once asked it from the goddess Artemis but she wouldn't tell me how this is possible. It's magic, though, I can tell you that much, and it also affects my rucksack. It's also bigger from the inside and that's why I can cram there so much stuff."

"Does it weigh a lot?" asked Jon.

"Not at all", said Thalia briskly. "I could probably stick there a giant pumpkin and it wouldn't weigh a bit more than normally."

"Have you ever tried?" asked Bilbo. "Because if we are ever able to return to Bag End, you can gladly try with one of my pumpkins."

The rest of the night was very pleasant. The tent became warm quickly when Robb and Jon got a fire going and they started to grill sausages found from Fili's rucksack. While they waited for the sausages, Thorin, Fíli and Kíli gave samples of the dwarven music to Arya and Thalia. Thorin's voice caught both girls off-guard in a good way.

"Wow, that sounded a lot better than anything I've heard the past few years", sighed Thalia, enthralled. "Wish we had singers like you in the States. You'd totally show the wimpy pop singers we nowadays have."

"Thalia, do you sing?" asked Fíli.

"Very, very badly. I have no talents whatsoever."

"Oh come on, sing to us", pleaded Kíli. "We'd like to hear what sort of music you have in your home land."

Thalia flushed. "Well, there are loads of different genres. I myself generally listen to only rock and punk. Sometimes, quite rarely, I listen to pop and that's only if the singer has earned my respect. Umm, rock, punk and pop are music genres. It's gonna take forever to explain them to you all…"

"Just sing", commanded Thorin.

"Umm…

_ When cold wind is a' calling,  
And the sky is clear and bright,  
Misty mountains sing and beckon,  
Lead me out into the light_

I will ride, I will fly,  
Chase the wind and touch the sky,  
I will fly,  
Chase the wind and touch the sky…"

For her surprise Thalia started to enjoy the singing. Fíli and Kíli had started to play their violins and Nymeria waved her tail every time Thalia opened her mouth to start a new verse.

"No talents my arse", snorted Jon while grilling the sausages. "She sings quite well to me and even seems to enjoy it."

_"Where dark woods hide secrets,  
And mountains are fierce and bold,  
Deep waters hold reflections,  
Of times lost long ago_

I will hear their every story,  
Take hold of my own dream,  
Be as strong as the seas are stormy,  
And proud as an eagle's scream

I will ride, I will fly,  
Chase the wind and touch the sky,  
I will fly,  
Chase the wind and touch the sky…"

Suddenly from outside the tent they could hear a loud KA-BOOM! Jon's sausage flew off the frying stick and hit Fíli straight into his face. Arya fell on her back on Nymeria. The same happened to Bilbo, only he fell over on Thorin.

"What in the name of gods was that?" asked Robb shakily.

"Not anything you should worry", answered Thalia and got herself a sausage. "The first troll just fell into my minefield. I don't think any other trolls will try the same."

"A minefield?" Thorin repeated after helping Bilbo back on his feet (Kíli and Fíli were smiling at each other).

"Mines are explosives you hide under ground", explained Thalia. "I always have them with me. I got them from a friend who is a daughter of Ares, the War God. Gandalf tampered with them a bit."

Thalia smiled at the wizard who laughed good-naturedly. Fireworks were Gandalf's specialty and he could easily broaden his skills on explosives if needed. Under any other circumstances Gandalf wouldn't have helped to set the mines around the tent but the Company needed a good sleep. Arya was the first to fall asleep. She pulled her cloak over her and curled up against Nymeria. The rest of the Company did the same, but not Thalia, Fíli and Kíli. They had plans to work on.

* * *

I had to explain homosexual relationships to a ten-year-old once. I modified the conversation featured here from that conversation.

Dwarves singing and playing their instruments for the eeeepic win!

This story gets a tad darker from the next chapter. We'll move over to the Misty Mountains. This won't become angst, though, because humour is too much fun to write.

And Kíli is a kid. 'Nuff said.


	6. Chapter 6

Hi y'all and sorry for the big gap on updates. Had this thing called university entrance exams. But now everything's done and it's all writing baby!

Anyway, this was one of the most difficult chapters I've ever written - as well as also most fun to write. Well, the chapter itself isn't much fun but I had fun when I wrote it.

* * *

Chapter six

Where There Are Dangerous Cliffs, Sudden Heroes and Fights Started

**~..~**

There were two other explosions that night. Thalia had honestly never thought that the trolls would be so stupid. None of them bothered to be disturbed, though. Bilbo, Arya, Jon and Robb were sleeping soundly, as were Grey Wind, Ghost and Nymeria who once again served as pillows. Kíli and Fíli had (on purpose, naturally) fixed things up so that Thorin and Bilbo slept next to each other, and after they'd fallen asleep the lads and Thalia had started to plot their devious plans.

The Company passed the Trollshaws by the evening. Now they were supposed to turn south and head for Misty Mountains. But somewhere around Rivendell they were forced to face a problem. Gandalf disappeared. Bilbo, Thorin, Fíli and Kíli were already used to the fact that Gandalf came and went with no especial logic, but Thalia, Arya, Robb and Jon were not.

"Can we manage without him?" Robb fussed.

"I should think so", replied Fíli. "He tended to disappear a lot during our last adventure too, and no one died."

"There were some close calls, though", added Kíli, "but nothing worse than that. Besides, we were fourteen at the time – fifteen Gandalf counted in. So you could've thought at least one of us would've died but it didn't happen."

"Now that's very encouraging", said Robb with a controlled sarcastic emphasis. Thorin told them to shut up because he was trying to read the map. The map was very old but the facts were still accurate. The landmarks were clear and Thorin was quite certain of their current position, give or take a few miles.

"Right everyone, we turn south-east from here", said Thorin. "You can see the Misty Mountains in horizon. When we reach them we turn south."

"One thing, Your Majestic Bossiness", interrupted Thalia. Thorin glared at her but it didn't so much as make her flinch. "Do you have any idea where that damn map could be or do we have to search through all the one thousand and one caves of Misty Mountains?"

"I do not care for your tone", said Thorin with a scowl, "but now that you ask, yes, I actually do have an idea. As stupid as the Orcs are they do know how to use the value of the map. My strongest guess is that we will find the map in Moria."

"This task starts to sound more and more suicidal", grumbled Thalia. "Well, I suppose it can't be helped. But I must admit that if I really have to follow a male then I might as well follow you, as much as I hate it."

The rest of the Company prayed this wouldn't develop into a fight but their prayers weren't answered.

"What do you have against the males?" demanded Thorin.

"Nothing really, I'm just not into their leadership because more often than not the males tend to screw up everything."

"What was that supposed to mean?!"

"Hey hey hey!" yelled Jon. "I thought we were in the middle of a quest here! You two are in the same side so would you please just try to stand each other and get along!"

Thorin and Thalia glared at each other. Jon huffed and said that the quest would be all for naught if two members of the Company spent all their time in bickering. The rest of the Company agreed.

"Jon's right", said Robb. "If you have to fight, then at least do it after we have reclaimed the map."

And then they headed for Misty Mountains. Thorin led the squad and Thalia remained in the bottom with Fíli and Kíli. The three of them continued their way to pass time, meaning they planned their devious plots.

"Honestly saying I don't understand what Bilbo sees in Thorin", whispered Thalia.

"Thorin is actually quite nice", answered Fíli. "And if you think of all the times they've saved each other's lives, I'm surprised they haven't realized their feelings for each other sooner."

"That is so true", Kíli agreed. "And Uncle hasn't ever hugged anyone except for us and Mum, and then he went and hugged Bilbo. I'm telling you, it's love."

"Okay, fine."

Meanwhile Bilbo and Arya had agreed that once the Company would reach Moria they would, as the smallest, sneak in. The others would make distractions outside. Arya was very impressed of Thalia's mines and was sure they would work also in Moria. Bilbo agreed with her but he also brought up another problem: how to keep out of sight. The Orcs were all for darkness and saw well in dark, detecting even the slightest movements.

"Sod it", huffed Arya.

"We'll come up with something", Bilbo assured her. "We have time. Besides, I have a plan in case an emergency but I'll tell it only when the circumstances are bad enough."

"Do make sure you will not get yourselves killed down there", said Thorin. "I would try to stop you if this wasn't why I chose you to this Company."

"When it comes down to that, do take care of Arya", Robb asked Bilbo. "It would demand a great deal of the art of explaining if she should die."

Arya gave her brother an are-you-kidding-or-are-you-just-an-idiot sort of glance. Robb ruffled her hair and said it was a bad joke. Arya muttered to Bilbo that Robb had never been able to joke at the right place at the right time.

"That was quite a lot of right", laughed Bilbo. Arya chuckled too as she realised that it was true.

"Oh please, Arya will survive, hopefully", said Jon. "Truth be told I've never met anyone as persistent as her."

"I will take care of her when it comes down to that", Bilbo promised. Arya smiled at patted the hilt of Needle. She felt very confident of everything. Unfortunately the same could not be said of her brothers who were lacking confidence on their sister – or truth be told, Jon did not doubt his sister's abilities but rather her self-control in a fiery situation. Bilbo turned to look at Fíli, Kíli and Thalia and said, "Hey, don't you also think Arya will do fine when we reach Moria?"

"Hm? Oh, there's no doubt!" exclaimed Fíli. "The Orcs will come to curse the day…"

"… when Arya Stark laid her foot on Middle-Earth", Kíli ended and smiled at Arya. She felt like blushing.

"With those skills I'd gladly recruit you to the Hunters of Artemis", added Thalia. "We'd finally get a hunter who knows her way around with the sword. I mean truly knows."

"Well there you go", Bilbo said to Robb and Jon. "You should have more faith in your sister."

Thorin tried not to smile. It did not pass unnoticed from Fíli, Kíli and Thalia. They gave each other knowing glances.

The Company reached the Misty Mountains three days later. They had had some trouble with the terrain but thanks to the harvesting skills of Thorin, Fíli and Kíli they could move on in a couple of hours. During that time Thalia had managed to teach Arya some handy disarming tricks and given her a knife for situations when she would not be able to use Needle.

"Well, looks like nobody's gonna turn back now", said Thalia when glancing the mountains with awe.

"For once in your life you are right, Thalia Grace", Thorin said. Thalia made a face upon hearing her last name. "Let's stick together. The mountains are treacherous."

"Oh, I don't like this, I don't like this at all", Kíli whimpered. He had got bad traumas last time he had been there.

"If possible, I like this even less than you", said Fíli and wrapped his arms around his younger brother protectively.

"We should go", said Bilbo. "The sooner we start climbing the mountains the sooner we get out of there."

"Will Grey Wind, Ghost and Nymeria manage?" Thorin asked Arya, Robb and Jon.

"I should think so", replied Jon. "At least they won't be giving up easily even if they wouldn't."

* * *

The Misty Mountains were not a place where Thalia, Arya, Jon or Robb would return if they had a choice. The path was extremely treacherous and they always had to be cautious of loose rocks. Bilbo and the Dwarves weren't much help either because the road they had used last time there had been destroyed months ago. As for these circumstances they just had to improvise and try to figure out especially by the stars at night where they were going. The good news was that the direwolves managed to walk in the mountains about as well as they could in a forest. Same could not be said of Thalia who turned pale every time the path narrowed even a bit and they had to walk by the edge. Unless the rest of the company hadn't known she was a daughter of the god of sky they would have thought she was afraid of the heights. Thalia walked her side first every time the path narrowed down drastically. They all would try to avoid the edge the best they could, naturally, but Thalia seemed to be so repulsed by it that it could've as well carried a disease.

None of them could tell how many miles they had walked or for how long they had been on the way. So far they hadn't been able to find proper places to sleep in so they were restricted to a four-hour's rest per night. Especially Arya was tired. Maybe because of her insomnia she stepped wrong and slipped over the cliff with a shrill scream.

"Arya!" shrieked Jon with a voice an octave higher than normal, dashed against the edge and looked down. Arya was hanging onto a small ledge and looked more scared than ever in her entire life.

"Help!"

"Hold on!" shouted Kíli. "Fee, give me the rope, I'll go get her."

"Be careful, _nadadith_", pleaded Fíli looking just as scared as Arya did. He bound the rope around his brother's waist and so Kíli started to climb down the mountain. Thorin, Bilbo and Robb helped to set down the rope while Jon was telling them what to do. Thalia was deathly pale and could not move.

"Thalia, help us!" Thorin commanded but the hunter wasn't able to budge. The direwolves were whimpering and especially Nymeria tried to get free from Jon's grip and go help her mistress.

Kíli descended to Arya as quickly as he dared. It was very careful business: one wrong step and he'd be worse off than Arya, dead. The thought seemed to fill Fíli's mind, as worried as he looked while setting down the rope. Kíli made a wrong step once and his foot slipped. Luckily he was able to correct his posture but it didn't stop Fíli from letting out a startled cry.

"Okay, he's there!" Jon told the others. "Hold the rope and get ready to pull."

Kíli wrapped his left arm around Arya's waist and told her to hold on tight. Arya didn't dare to loosen her grip of the ledge straightaway but little by little wrapped both her arms around Kíli's neck and grabbed his cloak as if her life had depended on it. She seemed to cry, or so Kíli thought. He started to climb while Fíli, Thorin, Bilbo and Robb pulled the rope. When the two of them were close enough Jon and Thorin reached their hands and pulled them into safety. Jon hugged his sister and tried to hold back tears. Robb would've done the same if Thorin, Fíli and Kíli hadn't been on his way. Fíli was squeezing his brother so tightly that Thorin was sure he would strangle him before long.

"Oh Arya, I was so scared", murmured Jon, ruffled her hair and hugged her again. "Thank goodness you're alright."

Arya indeed cried. She had been certain she was a goner. She was shivering like she had been very cold.

"Fíli, let me go!" Kíli shouted to his older brother's ear. "I'm right as rain! Get off!"

"Look", said Bilbo. "We should get out of here. I saw a cave not far from here, come on."

"Where?" asked Thorin.

"Twenty yards from here at most. Come along!"

As per typical for the mountains, the mist started to rise. Jon grabbed Thalia's hand and helped her to the cave. It was not a big cave but they could fit in it quite nicely. Robb wrapped his cloak around Arya's shoulders now that he finally had a chance and then helped Bilbo to get a fire going – they had taken some firewood with them. Arya still seemed to be in a shock. Fíli made his brother sit next to her and told him to stay there. The direwolves came in next and Nymeria pressed her head onto Arya's lap. Arya automatically scratched her ear. The last one in was Jon leading Thalia. Thalia glanced at Arya and then lowered her head as though she had been ashamed of something.

"You!" shouted Thorin. "What were you doing?!"

"What? I… N-nothing…" Thalia murmured.

"Exactly!" Thorin was boiling with rage. "Arya could have died and you – did - _nothing_!"

"Do you think I'm not ashamed?!" yelled Thalia. "Do you think I didn't help on purpose?!"

"I cannot believe it had to be you Gandalf chose to this Company! Not a worse choice he could have made – a coward."

All of the sudden Aegis was right in front of the dwarven king's face and he bolted several steps back. Thalia was breathing heavily. Her spirit had returned and her spear blazed in rhythm with her blue eyes.

"You can call me whatever you like for all I care", she growled, "but do – you – not – _dare_ – to – call me – a coward!"

"Thalia, calm down!" shouted Jon and tried to take the spear from Thalia.

"Don't you dare even _try_ to tell me what to do, Jon Snow!" screamed Thalia. Thorin pulled out Orcrist, ready for a duel. "Oh, so you're craving to get your ass kicked, Your Grumpiness?"

"Bring it on, pinecone face!"

Thorin wasn't sure why he called Thalia pinecone face. It just seemed like a valid insult. They prepared to attack each other whilst the rest of the Company was utterly helpless –

"Stop it!"

Arya had finally got her voice back. She squeezed Robb's cloak around her and instead of upset she just looked angry.

"Listen to yourselves! Kíli could've died for me, I almost died, and you… you're bickering like Bran and Rickon on their worst days! Grow up, both of you!"

Bilbo offered her some tea. "Arya has a point", he said. "Stop it right now. It won't help anyone if you just fight."

Thalia turned Aegis back to a bracelet and her spear back to pepper spray bottle and went to sit in a corner arms around her knees. Thorin put Orcrist back to its hilt and went to sit near the mouth of the cave. He was now glaring also at Arya in addition to Thalia. How did she dare to compare him to a child?

Arya paid no attention on the glaring because she was looking at Kíli who had also received a cup of tea from Bilbo. Kíli seemed almost unnaturally calm when you thought of what he had just done.

"Kíli – thank you", said Arya. "I owe you one."

Kíli ruffled Arya's already messy hair with a grin. "Never you mind, I'm always prepared to rescue my little sister."

"What do you mean?" asked Arya in confusion.

"Trust me, I've always wanted a younger sister or brother", said Kíli. "When you joined this company, I immediately felt like you could be someone I could call little sister, someone I could protect. The gods know how nerve-wrecking it is when one dunderhead tries to protect me from everything and won't let me return the favour."

Kíli poked Fíli's side with his elbow playfully. Fíli couldn't help a laugh. "Guilty as charged", he said and placed his hand on Kíli's shoulder. "I do try to be less protective on you, _nadadith_, but what can I do when I've got the cutest baby brother in the world!"

The brothers started to wrestle and the depressed atmosphere in the cave lightened up a bit. Robb sat next to Arya to wait for Bilbo and Jon to finish with dinner (or tea, you automatically lost your circadian rhythm in Misty Mountains). Bilbo and Jon laughed at Kíli's attempts to beat his brother. Fíli managed to tackle him every time. Nymeria waved her tail her head still on Arya's lap and Grey Wind went near the fire as if asking when they could eat.

"They're trying to be all grownup but underneath it all…" chuckled Bilbo while giving Fíli and Kíli a gentle look.

"You seem to like them a lot", Jon stated the obvious.

"Aye, I do", said Bilbo. "They remind me of everything good left in this world. Hey, stop it already and have some dinner!"

"Brilliant!" Kíli exclaimed and tripped Fíli so that he could reach the food first. Bilbo hit him on the top of his head with a wooden ladle gently.

"Mind your manners."

"Oops, sorry Bilbo."

Bilbo shared the plate and spoons. Jon wondered for a moment where Ghost had gone until spotted him from the furthest corner of the cave. Ghost had nuzzled himself against Thalia. She hadn't budged even an inch from the position she had been in for all that time. Jon filled one plate with soup and went to give it to her.

"Here you go."

"Not hungry", Thalia said with a thick voice. It sounded like she had wept. And then her stomach grumbled.

"You must eat, Thalia", persuaded Jon. "You need energy."

Thalia loosened the grip from her knees and took the plate. She had clearly cried, at least so Jon deduced from her red eyes. Jon went to get some soup from himself and a sausage for Ghost, and then sat next to Thalia to eat.

"Look, I understand if you don't wish to talk about it, but why were you so scared back then?" asked Jon cautiously. Thalia almost finished with her soup before answering.

"Promise me you won't laugh."

"I promise."

Thalia looked down and said with a hardly audible voice, "I'm scared of heights."

"How is that a laughing matter? It's quite understandable!"

Thalia looked at Jon with a sarcastic expression. "Well isn't it kinda embarrassing for a daughter of the Sky God to be suffering from a fear of heights?"

"Oh right, I already forgot about this whole business with the gods."

"I wish I could forget about it, too."

Jon patted Thalia's shoulder. "Well, it does explain many things. Do you want to hear a secret?"

Thalia nodded.

"I would've been just as terrified and deathly pale if it had been enormous spiders to attack Arya. Above all other creatures I hate spiders."

At this point Thalia couldn't help a quiet laugh. She had never even thought Jon would be scared of spiders. Jon on the other hand was satisfied that he had managed to make Thalia smile and almost laugh. Maybe they would get through also this unfortunate phase.

* * *

**Nadadith **= little brother

I seriously don't know if Jon's actually scared of spiders but it seemed to suit this part so I left it like that.

It was actually sort of fun to write about Thorin and Thalia yelling at each other. You two, just give each other a break, will ya?

... and Fíli and Kíli are adorable.


	7. Chapter 7

It's been a while since last update because now I officially am the laziest translator in the whole world. Sorry about that. Anyway, this chapter is one of my favourites in this story. You'll see why^^ And thank you for the lovely comments, they've definitely made my day.

* * *

Chapter seven

Where They Tell Stories

**~..~**

Even after the dinner Thorin was still sulking near the mouth of the cave. It ruined the mood quite badly. Because of it not even Fíli and Kíli had the energy to fool around. For the first time in a very long time Thorin had refused to eat, so angry he was. Bilbo had just sighed deeply and left some soup to the bottom of the pot just in case Thorin would want to eat it later that night. Most of the Company went to sleep quickly – only Thorin, Bilbo and Thalia in her corner stayed up.

"Thorin, would you please stop that ridiculous sulking already", snapped Bilbo quietly so that he wouldn't wake anyone. "Arya and Kíli are both fine."

"Do not tell me you accept the fact that Thalia did nothing", grunted Thorin.

"I did not. But you should think of it from her point of view. I don't see you budging an inch if you were scared of heights."

Thorin glanced Bilbo in surprise. "How do you know she is afraid of heights?"

"Well it has been quite clear", said Bilbo. "She went pale as a ghost the minute we told her we'd climb the mountains, remember? Plus she was always scared of the edge, had her gaze on the sky all the time and in narrow spots walked her side first. I just had to put these leads together in my head and bang, I made up a conclusion."

"Then why didn't she say anything?" asked Thorin.

Bilbo took a deep breath. "I think it's because you and her are so much alike."

"Whatever do you mean?"

"You're both very proud, never admitting it when you've made a mistake", Bilbo began. "Also from what I've understood, Thalia leads those hunters of hers whenever their goddess isn't there, and since she is a daughter of a supreme god of some sorts people always expect strong leadership from her. And I bet it's not easy if everyone assumes that because of it she is automatically a natural leader. I've understood that Thalia doesn't really like her role of a leader. I don't think you liked it either when you were getting used to it."

Thorin looked abashed. "But why is she questioning my role of leadership all the time if she doesn't like hers?"

Bilbo looked at Thorin as if the Dwarf were either an extremely bad judge of human nature, tactless or just slow. "She is so used to her role that she doesn't know anything else. Now that she doesn't have to lead she must feel herself useless. Plus she likes Arya a lot, because of which she is ashamed that she didn't act and is angry because of her fear of heights."

Bilbo breathed. He hadn't spoken this much in a row for a very long time. "What I'm trying to say here is that you should talk to her. Without flailing with the weapons, that is. A proper apology wouldn't hurt either. It was quite harsh, what you said to her."

"I will think about it", sighed Thorin. Bilbo was satisfied with it. Thorin hardly ever apologised to anyone so a promise to think about it was a big step.

Then Thalia moved to sit near the mouth of the cave, her hand on her pepper spray bottle. She looked very tired but clearly had decided to stay awake no matter what.

"Go to bed, you two", she said. "I'll stay on watch."

"I could use some sleep", said Bilbo and got up. He gave Thorin one last significant glance before snuggling up next to Ghost and falling asleep.

Thorin had never felt himself so uncomfortable. He had no idea whatsoever how to start a conversation. Thalia was looking outside, not that there had been any point in it because of the mist. She remained absolutely still, like… like a tree. Her eyes weren't thundering any longer, they only were excessively sad. Thorin was sure she was haunted by something else than just Arya's accident.

"I told you to go to bed", Thalia sighed without even looking at Thorin. "Do I have to spell it for you one syllable at the time?"

Thorin had to concentrate so that he wouldn't have been provoked to snap anything. "Thalia, I – I talked to Bilbo and he told me that he thinks I have treated you too harshly. I admit that he is right, and I'd also like to apologise for calling you a coward."

Thalia looked very surprised to hear that. "Did my old ears hear correctly?" she asked. "Did the ever so majestic Thorin Oakenshield just offer me an apology?"

"Yes", Thorin grunted. Thalia's face was graced by a relieved smile.

"Apology accepted, on one condition. You forgive me the loss of my nerves and getting to know Aegis a bit too well. I know from experience that it's not very nice."

"The condition and apology accepted", Thorin nodded. "Bilbo also told me you're afraid of heights."

Thalia looked at the Dwarf king with confusion. "How did he know? I haven't told anyone about it, except Jon and my friend Percy about a half-year back."

"Bilbo told me he drew a conclusion from your behaviour."

"Oh. Well, I suppose there's no denying it. I truly am scared to death when it comes to high places."

"Why didn't you say anything?" asked Thorin. "We could have found a detour."

"I'll tell you now the same I told Jon: well isn't it quite embarrassing for a daughter of a Sky God to be afraid of heights? To be honest I'm so ashamed of the whole thing."

"There is nothing to be ashamed of in a fear of heights", said Thorin.

"I wasn't talking about that, I meant how it affected my inability to help Arya", huffed Thalia impatiently. "You should be proud of Kíli. I've never seen such courage."

Thorin checked that Kíli was fast asleep. Not that it was actually necessary because Kíli was snoring one arm over Fíli's face as per usual.

"If I'm quite honest with you", Thorin said so quietly that Thalia almost didn't hear him, "I have never been fully sure if Kíli is brave or just very, very stupid."

"Sometimes they go hand in hand", grinned Thalia. "Sounds a lot like my friend Percy. He's always rushing to help everyone so that it makes him look very stupid but at the same time he also always manages to save the day so everyone thinks he's oh so brave."

Thorin laughed for the second time during the entire journey. Honestly saying it was a miracle no one woke up because of it. Bilbo made a slight move but didn't seem to be very disturbed. Thalia couldn't help bursting into laughter either. They laughed until they were wiping their eyes.

"And here I thought you're so majestic that you never laugh!" breathed Thalia.

"I am not the type to laugh very often", replied Thorin casually. They were silent for a moment until he continued, "You know, go to sleep. I'll take your watch."

"Are you sure?"

"Go to sleep or do I have to persuade you with Orcrist?"

Thalia giggled and then settled herself close to Robb and Jon who were sleeping under their cloaks against Grey Wind. Unlike these two, Thalia dug her rucksack until she found a bedroll, a sleeping bag and a pillow. She snuggled inside the bag and then asked one last time, "Your Majestic Grumpiness, is this really okay with you?"

"Will you just sleep before I do something I regret!" Thorin huffed.

"Alright, alright", said Thalia. Before drifting off she added, "You know, you really should smile more often. Trust me, it wouldn't make you look any less majestic. And I think Bilbo would like it."

After saying that Thalia fell asleep and left a flabbergasted Thorin to watch.

* * *

It was thundering in the morning. Mist had ceased but it was raining as if it had never rained before. It was not the weather to trek in the mountains, not if they had a choice. Fíli and Kíli were the first up and they were getting the smouldering fire going again. The cave was soon warm and lit again. In the shimmer of the fire the brothers could also see how Thorin and Bilbo were sleeping hand in hand.

"Well would you look at that", grinned Fíli. Kíli poked Thalia until she woke up because she couldn't miss this rare moment. She couldn't help a smile.

"Oh", she let out. "I never thought I'd say this but that's the cutest thing I've seen in a while, including one wolf pup in Minnesota."

"Let's get the breakfast done", said Kíli. "So, did you and Uncle Thorin kiss and make up?"

"Yeah", answered Thalia while getting some cereals laced with honey from her rucksack. "Though we didn't kiss, really, thank gods for that. But he did apologize to me for calling me a coward. I think he's got fever. Well not really!" she added after seeing the faces of the Dwarven brothers. "Anyway, we talked things through and agreed that from now on we'll try not to murder each other. He was actually quite friendly to me. I'm beginning to understand what Bilbo sees in him."

Thalia passed the cereal box to Fíli and briefly explained what they were. Fíli was completely in awe of Thalia's rucksack and its contents. He said that from now on she'd be their food wagon. Thalia laughed and promised to be that.

"By Mahal how it rains", sighed Kíli. "We are definitely not continuing the journey today. It's fun to be the hero but even I can't be there to save the Company all the time."

"You did it _once_", said Fíli. "Which reminds me that are you scared of heights, Thalia?"

Thalia let out a frustrated huff. "So what am I, Captain Obvious? Does the whole world know already?"

Fíli and Kíli simply shrugged and said that they only knew because Jon mentioned it to them. "I did think it could be it", added Fíli. "Because you certainly aren't a coward." Thalia's cheeks started to glow pink.

Then Bilbo and Thorin woke up, followed closely by Ghost. Bilbo rubbed his eyes with the hand that had just a moment ago been on top of Thorin's. Fíli, Kíli and Thalia did not miss it because none of them could control an almost annoyingly knowing grin.

"Morning", said Kíli with a slight insinuating emphasis on his tone. Fíli looked like he was biting his tongue to prevent himself from laughing.

Bilbo yawned. "M-m-morning. How long have you been up?"

"Fifteen minutes tops", answered Thalia. "And we're so not going on in that weather", she added to Thorin, pointing the mouth of the cave with her thumb. "_No_body in this Company can be _that_ suicidal."

"You're right", said Thorin. "We have too much experience on travelling here when it rains. Although back then the weather was even worse."

"True, because those blasted stone giants had to fight just then", Fíli said looking at his brother who seemed to be eternally traumatised for the incident. "We were incredibly lucky that nobody died."

"It was a close call, though", stated Bilbo. "Oh, you've made breakfast. That's great!"

Ghost sat next to Thalia silent as always and looked at her as if asking when he could be fed. Thalia scratched his ear and gave him some sausages from her rucksack. Arya woke up moments later and instantly got a bowl of cereals. Thalia also gave her a chocolate bar she had been saving. "I'll make yesterday up to you somehow", she promised.

"There's no need, really", said Arya, though she was very pleased of the cereals. They tasted good. "I'm right as rain."

"That's good to hear", Thalia smiled and hugged Arya. "If something had happened to you I would've died. I sure as hell would've."

"True, because Thorin would've murdered you", laughed Fíli. Thorin flashed him a I'll-murder-_you_-if-you-don't-shut-up-this-instant glance which made the lad fell quiet in less than a second.

"Let's not think of it anymore", said Bilbo. "I'd rather think of ways to kill time because it looks like we are stuck in here."

By afternoon the whole Company was nearly bored to death. Thalia and Jon were playing tic-tac-toe on her notebook but they didn't even concentrate on it anymore. Arya was most likely the most bored because there was no room for her to practise with her sword. She was already able to hold Needle straight for a half-hour which of course made her happy but did not save from boredom. Robb had fallen asleep again soon after breakfast.

"Oh, just leave it", Jon said after Thalia had beaten him for the third time in a row. "There's no point in this."

"Can you make up anything better to do?" asked Thalia. "Although quite truthfully you are right. There's absolutely no point in this anymore."

"We could tell stories", suggested Arya. Robb excluded the Company looked at her with interest. They had nothing better to do and considering their very different backgrounds the stories were bound to be new and interesting. Jon and Arya started the round by telling the story of the battle at Trident, ending with the Targaryen reign losing its power and Robert Baratheon taking the throne of Westeros. Jon also told the story how the wife and children of Rhaegar Targaryen were brutally murdered.

"Ewww!" shrieked Thalia. "Those poor children! How can anyone be that sick, seriously?!"

"That is war for you", sighed Thorin. "Not that it makes murdering children any more acceptable."

"Could someone now tell a little gentler story, please?" asked Bilbo. Jon and Arya apologised the sickness of their story but nobody would take it. They had agreed to tell stories and if someone couldn't handle it, it was their problem.

"I know a good one", grinned Thalia. "It's a fairytale pretty much all kids at home at the States have heard. Snow White and the Seven Dwarves."

"_What _and the Seven Dwarves?"

"Snow White", said Thalia and laughed at the faces Thorin, Fíli and Kíli made. She began the story like she'd been telling it for kids as a bedtime story, "Once upon a time in a land far, far away…"

Bilbo, Jon and Arya burst into laughter when Thalia started to recite the names of the Dwarves, "Doc, Bashful, Happy, Sneezy, Sleepy, Dopey… and last but not least, Grumpy." Thalia paused for a couple of seconds. "But actually for this version I could change Grumpy to Thorin."

Now also Fíli and Kíli started to chortle, which resulted to Robb waking up cranky and Thorin glowering at Thalia.

"Thalia, do you insist being killed slowly?" he asked.

"Well, no", admitted Thalia. "I'll just keep Grumpy as he is, Your Grumpiness."

The whole Company, Thorin included, laughed. Then Thalia went on with the story. She altered it a bit so that the Dwarves had a slightly bigger role than what they had in the original tale or in the Disney film. After it was over Thorin stated that the story had been quite enjoyable excluding some prejudices and delusions concerning dwarves.

"Ori could rewrite the whole thing", Kíli suggested. "He's an excellent writer."

"I wanna read that version then", said Thalia. "Snow White never was my favorite fairytale but I always liked the Dwarves."

"But of course", Fíli said like it were obvious. "Who wouldn't love us Dwarves?"

"Well, for example the elves", stated Bilbo.

"What on earth do the elves have against you, or you against them?" asked Robb.

"They think we're a bunch of greedy gits only interested in gems and precious metals", answered Fíli. "And we have a reason to hate them because they didn't help us when we lost Erebor."

That gave Thorin a natural transition to start telling the story of the loss of Erebor and the battle of Azanulbizar. Bilbo, Kíli and Fíli had heard the stories many times now but listened as closely as Robb, Jon, Arya and Thalia who heard them for the first time.

"So you seriously managed to block Azog with only a branch of oak?" Thalia asked with her eyes wide.

"Quite seriously", Kíli assured for his uncle. "Unfortunately that filth didn't die back then."

"That thrice-cursed…" Fíli called Azog with such a word that Bilbo had to smack him to the backside of his head. "OW! Quit smacking me!"

"Then don't use language like that", snapped Bilbo. "Go on, Thorin."

And Thorin went on until reaching the part where he, Fíli, Kíli and their ten companions met Bilbo at Bag End. That was where he ended the story because everyone more or less knew how it went on from there. Thalia, Jon and Robb couldn't help but to stare at Thorin in awe.

"That", said Arya, "was probably the best story I've ever heard. Beats even my favourite story of the ancient warrior queen Nymeria."

Then they noticed the rain had stopped. They decided to move on even though the path was most likely very slippery. Both Arya and Thalia looked a bit greenish at the thought of the grown risk to fall but there was no helping in it, they had to move on. The weather at Misty Mountains was fickler than anywhere else in Middle-Earth, it changed without any logic whatsoever. One could never know how long fair weather lasted and they had to make the best of that time. Arya decided to ride Grey Wind again because he was the steadiest on his feet out of the Company. She wouldn't take any more risks. Thorin tried to draw conclusions of their whereabouts at the moment but it was close to impossible. The sun didn't help much either because it was veiled by some thin fog. There wasn't much thin fog but enough to ruin precise orienteering.

Thorin turned to Thalia. "You don't happen to have any items to help us conclude where the north is, say, a compass?"

"Well bite me, thanks for reminding!" exclaimed Thalia. "Compass, compass… where in the name of Styx can it be…" she muttered while digging her rucksack. "Ha! Found it! How could I forget about the whole thingy…?"

Thalia pulled a small compass from the rucksack. Its needle pointed at the back of the cave. Bilbo mumbled that he would've taken his compass along if he hadn't forgotten it at Bag End. Thorin took the compass from Thalia and put it on his map. He still couldn't draw precise conclusions of their current whereabouts but at least now they could make sure they were heading south. They packed up their belongings so that they gave Thalia any extra weight they possibly had because they fit her bag. Then they got going.

* * *

I can't even being to describe how much I enjoyed imagining Thorin's expression when Thalia tells the Company Snow White xDDD And I also actually noticed when I wrote chapter five or six how alike Thorin and Thalia actually are. It was a bit spooky, really.

And Thorin and Bilbo are so cute together. This actually brings back my feeling of frustration when I wrote the original Finnish version of this fic. I was all, "Would you idiots just kiss already?"

I'm also quite unsure whether Kíli is brave or just very, very stupid.


	8. Chapter 8

Again, so sorry for this ridiculously long gap between updates. I'm gonna try to update the next chapter more quickly than I did with this one.

This chapter is something of a filler because nothing really happens but I needed a transition between the previous chapter and what's gonna happen in the future chapters. Hope you enjoy anyway.

* * *

Chapter eight

Where Fíli Is a Bully

** ~..~**

The Company reached the snowy part of Misty Mountains after three difficult days. They were now somewhere in the middle of the mountains, maybe soon at the east edge. Whatever the case they were in the better side. They'd been lucky, too. So far they had only bumped into two goblins who hadn't been any match for Fíli and Kíli. They hadn't seen any Orcs, which could be a good or a bad sign.

"We need to be quick here", said Thorin. "There isn't much shelter here, so move your legs."

"Easy enough for him to say", Jon grumbled while trying to move in the thick piles of snow. He, along with Robb and Arya, had dressed in their cloaks, and Thalia had changed her silvery parka to a longer black coat and added a warm beanie, a scarf and mittens. Bilbo, too, had added some additional clothes but he was still bare feet. When asked he said that the hair on his feet kept them warm.

They had been trekking across the snowy field for a couple of hours when a snowball flew on the backside of Jon's head. Jon cursed and turned around to see who had thrown it. Fíli, Kíli, Thalia and Arya were walking behind him so one of them had to be guilty, but which one? Jon thought about it for a moment and then pushed Arya so that she ended up in the snow.

"Oi!" screeched Arya. "It wasn't me!"

"Yes it was, it was Arya", said Kíli.

Arya glared him. "You bloody traitor."

Jon didn't hesitate and threw a snowball right at Kíli's face. It didn't take many seconds for the youngest members of the Company (aside from Robb) to be in a full snowball fight. Robb made a disapproving snort even though just a couple of weeks before he had also been fighting with all his heart. Thorin and Bilbo glanced at each other, and even though they were supposed to move quickly, they decided to let the children play. One snowball accidentally hit Bilbo to his shoulder and even though Fíli who had thrown it tried to apologise, Bilbo joined the fight. Thorin lit his pipe to kill some time. Robb sighed deeply and decided to hide behind Grey Wind just in case. Thorin should have done the same.

"Thorin!" Jon shouted trying to warn the leader of a snowball gone astray, but too late. The ball hit Thorin straight into his face. His pipe flew into the snow. No one dared to move for many moments and Bilbo looked guilty. Thorin narrowed his eyes dangerously.

"Two can play at this game, master Baggins", said the Dwarven king and joined the fight by tackling Bilbo. The fight didn't go on for much longer because the voice of reason, also known as Robb, told them to get going again.

Because of the difficult conditions it took them four days to get away from the snowy fields. Thalia cursed like a sailor every time she stepped wrong and her leg got stuck somewhere. The whole Company was incredibly relieved when they finally got rid of snow and were able to put their feet on solid rock. Fíli and Kíli were still keeping a close eye on Bilbo and Thorin. Bilbo had decided to walk the rest of the way so that he wouldn't strain Ghost too much. Arya made the same decision. Besides, the path was dangerously narrow again. It was easier that she walked on her own. This time Arya was much more careful on where she put her feet.

Then it started to rain again. Thalia looked at the sky with irritation and asked, "Dad, was that really necessary?" It most likely was the worst situation to be caught in the rain: a narrow mountain path that became slippery like ice immediately when wet. There seemed not to be any caves nearby and there was no point in staying put, either. Luckily it seemed to be only raining – a thunderstorm would've been absolutely awful. Jon was holding Arya's hand just in case. He wouldn't let his sister fall again. Fíli was walking behind the rest of the Company to keep an eye on everyone – especially Kíli who seemed to be quite displeased of this mothering. Thalia was looking at her feet so that she'd know where to place them. Behind Bilbo and Thorin Robb was doing the same.

"If we now bump into Orcs or goblins, I'm going to scream", huffed Arya when she had almost slipped on her buttocks in the wet hillside.

"It's alright, the path is getting wider!" shouted Thorin.

"Well about time!" answered Kíli. "My balance isn't very good at the moment, just saying."

The path truly started to widen at some point but at the same time they had to walk downhill, which wasn't especially nice when it was raining. Arya and Thalia cursed unanimously. Thalia already had enough trouble with her scare of heights; the downhill didn't ease it one bit.

"Careful with your steps!" Thorin told them.

"Yes, yes", grumbled the rear (also known as Thalia, Fíli and Kíli).

"One could think we'd be half-wits if you listened to the way he talks to us", said Kíli.

"Well, in your case it might be true", Fíli chuckled. "Uncle did drop you on your head often enough when you were little. Oh, how Mum used to yell at him when he did."

"Shut up", retorted Kíli.

"Behave, you two", said Thalia. "You better not start fighting here. Oh, I just wish we wouldn't bump intoOorcs or goblins…"

* * *

In a few hours they finally managed to find a cave. It was bigger than the previous one they had rested in and because the floor was covered with sand, Thorin and Bilbo went in first to check that it wasn't a trap set up by goblins. It would not be the first time if it were. They carefully inspected the cave – also that there wouldn't be any secret passages – and stated it to be safe. Thorin praised Bilbo for the good work and patted his back. Fíli, Kíli and Thalia looked at each other, sharing a knowing smile. Robb placed his soaked cloak on the rocks by the walls of the cave to dry and did the same to Jon and Arya's cloaks.

"How much do we have food?" asked Kíli.

Bilbo and Thalia went through the Company's supplies. They had now been on the journey for about one month, maybe longer, and the supplies were decreasing.

"Maybe for three days", answered Bilbo. "Which means we need to start rationing."

This announcement created common melancholy and groaning. During these weeks they had been on their way they had learned that when hungry everyone felt miserable and didn't have much patience.

Arya had decided not to feel depressed, so she continued her swordplay training with a disciplined expression on her face. This time her teacher was Fíli who was, as Arya had to admit, better in handling a sword than his brother. Fíli started to teach her some basic blocks and a wide scale of lunges – mainly because Needle was poor for cutting off heads. Arya repeated the movements with such precision that it left everyone flabbergasted. Just in those few weeks she had learned so much. On the other hand, when she had left for this journey, Arya had decided that she wouldn't be a burden to anyone, and one way to avoid it was to be a quick learner.

"Just mentioning, have you noted that the orcs rarely use swords that Needle could block?" asked Thorin.

"Of course", answered Fíli. "Right, Arya, the best way to block the orc swords, axes and javelins is to duck and then lunge. Do you understand?"

"Sure, I'm not a dunderhead", snorted Arya and ducked just in time when Fíli waved his sword over her head.

"Just so, shorty."

"Excuse me?" huffed Arya. But it was a plot. Fíli used Arya's slackening for his own profit and disarmed her.

"And now you're dead", he said. "Never fall for it, even if you were badly provoked by your opponent. Close your ears from the jibes and strengthen your other senses."

Arya picked Needle from the ground and answered, "Understood. Do we go on?"

"Do you still have the strength?"

"Of course I do." Arya breathed and continued, "Which one of us attacks?"

Fíli said he'd do it because he had more experience. Arya needed practise for blocking the attacks. She mastered the lunges almost perfectly. This time Fíli attacked very slowly but as she was wiser now Arya didn't let it bother. She waited patiently until Fíli truly got going. It was a very even battle. Fíli had an edge on his side because he was physically stronger than Arya but she was able to dodge more efficiently as she was a couple of inches shorter and quicker. After five long minutes Arya finally managed to strike Fíli's sword down with her right hand.

"Ha, beat you!" grinned Arya smugly.

"I admit you did", smiled Fíli. "Although I'd like to apologise to you."

"What for?"

Fíli kicked Arya in the shin and grabbed Needle. "That, I suppose."

"That's cheating!" snapped Arya.

"Best that you get used to it", Fíli stated calmly and gave Needle back to Arya. "The fights are never fair, and even less so if your opponent is an orc. Never assume the battle to be over when you've disarmed the enemy. A proper fight is won only when you've made sure the opponent can't fight back at all. But don't be sad", the dwarven prince added when seeing Arya's hurt expression. "It went really well. If you keep up this pace, you'll be a brilliant warrior in no-time. I'd believe you to stand a real chance against goblins now."

"Take a break, you two", said Bilbo strictly. "I mean it, you look like you'll pass out soon."

Arya collapsed next to Kíli. She hadn't even realised how much the fight had tired her or how sweaty she was. Fortunately it was cool enough for the sweat to dry quickly. Fíli was just as breathless. A part of his braids had started to come off during the fighting, so Kíli started to redo them. After getting them done he attacked Arya's hair.

"What are you doing?" asked Arya when Kíli took a small portion of her hair and started to braid it.

"How does it feel like to you? I'm making your hair, silly!"

Arya merely shrugged and let Kíli work. Jon and Robb raised their brows. Usually Arya told no one to touch her hair, let alone giving someone permission to braid it. She was very stubbornly keeping her hair open or bound to the back of her neck with a ribbon, never in any other ways no matter how much Mother, septa Mordane or Sansa tried to make them. But now Arya was sitting still and let Kíli make four braids to her hair.

"There, all done", said Kíli after putting a clasp to the last braid. "What do you think, everyone? Isn't she a real cutie?"

"They feel funny", said Arya and touched them lightly, as if fearing they'd come off.

"You'll get used to them", assured Fíli. "They suit you well."

"I agree", said Thalia. "They look really nice. I'd probably also want similar braids but I doubt you can make anything out of this."

Thalia touched her short black hair that had actually grown a bit during the last few weeks.

"Not really, no", said Fíli. "Maybe a couple of silly tufts but nothing more."

"Ugh, don't want those", Thalia blurted. "I don't wanna look like a seven-year-old."

Bilbo and Jon had started to prepare the dinner. It wasn't much but at least they didn't have to go to bed stomachs empty. They gave Arya the biggest portion because she was the youngest and needed energy the most. Arya tried to object because there was so little food but everyone else told her to shut up and eat. Before going to sleep Thorin checked that there was no one outside. The last thing they wanted was someone to attack. They also agreed on the watch turns which would last one hour per watcher. Fíli and Kíli would watch for two hours, though, because they refused to do it alone.

The night was calm apart from a little skirmish that had happened on Thalia's turn. Thalia had had to kill two goblins but there hadn't been much effort. One of them had frightened Aegis and had slipped over the edge, and the other had got an electric shock from Thalia's spear and died. They both were now disgusting carcasses, lying on the bottom of the gorge. After the breakfast Robb left to scout the path and returned with excitement.

"Guess what? The mist has ceased!"

"Has it?" Bilbo was overjoyed. "Wonderful, maybe we'll get out of here now."

"If we walk quickly, we will", said Thorin. "Robb, did you see anything else?"

"I did!" answered Robb enthusiastically. "I saw a grass field and some forest quite many miles away. Oh, and I saw two rivers, and I think the upriver of the other is somewhere near here."

Thorin took up the map and started to study it. "Right, I think we are now at the eastern side of Misty Mountains. The field you saw is called Gladden Fields, if I'm not wrong. We are there soon. Let's go."

And so a new day of the journey began. No one had been able to keep the track on how many days they had been on this trek. Not that it actually interested anyone, because especially Thalia and Arya were excited to get to the grass field. There still were many miles to walk, though. It would take the whole day, maybe even two, to reach the Gladden Fields. But at least it was easier to walk and the path seemed to lead the straight to the field. Everyone was praying that the weather wouldn't change. The sky was cloudy but it wasn't raining. The head wind created a minor problem. Luckily it wasn't blowing very hard or they would've been in trouble. After some time they reached the upriver of the Gladden river, which meant they weren't far away from the field.

At last the mountain path turned into a regular path. They had made it. Thalia collapsed on her knees and mumbled her thanks to every god she could think of. The rest of them were just as exhausted. Robb and Jon put up the tent the best they could. The Company ate quickly before falling asleep right where they happened to be, whether they were supported by a direwolf or not. Thalia had somehow managed to dig up her sleeping bag and pillow but for example Fíli, Kíli and Arya just fell asleep against Nymeria. Kíli and Arya were sleeping in Fíli's arms as per normal. Jon and Robb were sleeping under their cloaks, their heads in grass. Thorin and Bilbo had fallen asleep against Ghost's side as they were used to, and Ghost was sleeping his head over Grey Wind's. The watch shifts didn't even cross anyone's minds because no one had the energy to watch. They had walked so briskly to get away from the Misty Mountains. Fortunately the night was peaceful. The full moon helped, too. Orcs and goblins hated full moon almost as much as they hated the sun. For once the Company was safe.

* * *

The bickering between Fíli and Kíli is adapted from real life - from my and my sister's bickering. I'm so grateful that I have a little sister because it makes it so much easier to describe sibling bonds. From this chapter I started a phase where I kept the map of Middle Earth in front of me all the time when I wrote. If you think I've screwed up with the distances, I can only offer you my humblest apology. I've never been good at measuring distances.


	9. Chapter 9

I'm nice and done translating chapter nine, whee! Hope you like it - and hate the cliffhanger in the end xDD

I dedicate this, along with chapters 10, 11 and 12 to my little sister who is the Kíli to my Fíli. I'd walk to Mordor and back for her.

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Chapter nine

Where the Company Breaks

**~..~**

Fíli, Kíli and Thalia went hunting the next day. They all needed more supplies so it was a pure necessity. Thalia had dug up a bow and a quiver full of arrows and explained that archery was one of the first things the new Hunters of Artemis learned when joining. There wasn't much cover in Gladden Fields, so they had to crawl on the ground and whenever possible hide behind stunted bushes and great boulders. Still, they were lucky. There was a herd of deer nearby, grazing without an idea what was coming onto them. Thalia shot the first arrow to drive the herd apart. Soon after that it was Kíli's turn. He had spotted a deer slower than the others, so he aimed at it. The shot could not have been more perfect. The arrow hit the deer to its throat, killing it instantly. The three of them ran to see it. Kíli pulled his arrow out whilst Fíli bound the deer's legs. Thalia went to find her own arrow and then returned to help carry the deer back to camp. The beast was heavy but it wasn't that hard to carry it when there were three to do it. Besides the camp was close and the dwarves were strong.

"I'm so happy we were so lucky", said Thalia.

"Good shot, by the way", praised Kíli. "Right in the middle of the herd. It was perfect."

"Thanks. It was quite lucky, though. I've never been much of an archer, even though my skills have got better after I joined the Hunt. I'm more natural at open battle with a spear in my hand."

"Especially since you kill everyone threatening you just by touching them lightly", chuckled Fíli. Thalia laughed as well because it was true. She didn't need to stick her spear very deep when it was full of electricity.

After making it back to the camp Kíli and Thalia continued teaching Arya. They did this so that she wouldn't see the slaughtering of the deer. Arya had a lot of spirit for being only ten, but she was by no means ready to see anything that disgusting just yet. Arya didn't mind. She was more than happy to continue her training. This time Thalia was teaching her how to defend against weapons other than a sword. She began the training match with her spear, from which she had taken all the electricity so that she wouldn't give Arya a deadly electric shock. She also refused to use Aegis. She said the reason was that Arya would probably never have to seriously fight against her. Gods forbid if that were to happen.

"We'll all be doomed the day you two turn against each other", Kíli commented with a grin. Thalia told him to shut up because she and Arya had to concentrate. They did the movements slowly at first and then quickened the pace.

"Remember that you shouldn't rely on these things too much", reminded Thalia. "Every battle is a different one and every opponent has their own special way to fight. It'd be good if you learned to improvise at this - OUCH!"

Arya had hit Needle's side on Thalia's hand. Thalia was forced to drop her spear. She started to rub the reddish back of her hand.

"Sorry!" shouted Arya, terrified. "I… I didn't mean to…"

"My point exactly", smiled Thalia. "I sure did not teach you that. Well improvised!"

Arya gave a shy smile. "I didn't hurt you, though?"

"Yeah, you did, but it'll pass", promised Thalia. "I'm usually hurt for ten or fifteen minutes, tops. Then the pain goes away."

"Are you sure?" asked Arya.

"Yes, I'm sure. Kíli, take up from here, will you?" said Thalia. Kíli got up on his feet and took up roughly where Thalia had left off.

Meanwhile Thorin, Fíli and Jon had slaughtered the deer and gathered the eatable bits to one pile and the rest to another. Bilbo fried them and Robb packed most of the bits to bags he'd found from Thalia's rucksack. They were most likely meant for this purpose. It didn't take long to cook because deer was done quickly. Everyone felt happy when they got something to eat, including the direwolves who hadn't got a decent meal for days now. Jon had considered letting them go hunt on their own but decided otherwise – they didn't know the area and they might get lost.

* * *

The Company took off again about half an hour after the breakfast. Thorin had shown them their current location on the map and said that the eastern gate of Moria wasn't far away. It would be a three days' journey at most. Fíli, Kíli and Thalia cursed when no one else heard them. At this rate they'd have to hurry if they wanted to get Thorin and Bilbo together.

"I don't understand why it's so important to you", said Arya when they were taking break at around lunch-time. The Company had decided to follow a river called Andúin on their way to Moria, and they were on a break near one bend.

"It's important because it's bloody frustrating to look at Uncle and Bilbo", explained Kíli. "They've clearly been in love with each other for ages now but won't do anything for it. We just have to nudge them so that something would finally happen."

"And in addition we're behind schedule", added Fíli. "We have to figure out something, and quickly. If everything else fails, let's just push them so that they'll kiss."

"I like that plan", giggled Thalia. "Let's make it the plan B's plan B's plan B."

Fíli, Kíli and Arya looked at Thalia, puzzled. They had no idea what her point was. The Hunter sighed and clarified, "If everything else goes to hell, we'll just carry out Fíli's plan."

"Why didn't you say so immediately?" asked Fíli.

"Because I like to be as unclear as possible. Well, switching the subject, I'd like to know if you two have any hidden agendas behind this shipping. I know you like Bilbo a lot but according to what I've seen at home, whenever other people try to get two people together they always have hidden agendas."

Fíli and Kíli looked at each other, offended. They did not have any hidden agendas! How did Thalia even dare to hint so? They only thought of Thorin and Bilbo's happiness, nothing else. Except that…

"Well, if we're absolutely truthful", said Kíli with a light grin on his face, "I want to make sure that I get Bilbo's blueberry cupcakes as often as possible. They are divine."

The four of them burst into laughter and got either disapproving or wondering glances from Thorin, Bilbo, Jon and Robb. None of them understood what was so funny. Jon had tried to eavesdrop what Thalia and the dwarven brothers were plotting a couple of times but had never managed to hear enough. More often than not he had only heard the words "Thorin", "Bilbo" and "there's not enough time". By these words he had tried to make up a sensible conclusion but had failed. So Jon couldn't but wonder. Bilbo was wondering about it too but wouldn't let it bother him more than necessary. He was more worried about surviving. The hardest part, entering to Moria, was still ahead. Sometimes Bilbo couldn't understand why he had left Bag End once again but then he remembered how long it had taken to adapt to normal life after the previous adventure. Ten months. And when he had finally started to get used to peaceful life, Thorin, Fíli and Kíli had arrived and asked his help. Bilbo hadn't simply been able to refuse, mostly because (and this he did not admit even to himself) he missed adventures.

"How do they have the energy", muttered Thorin. "What are they even talking about?"

"Wish I knew", said Robb. "Though I'm not surprised Arya has joined them. It seems to be in her blood, joining secret things like that."

"As long as she doesn't get poor example", said Thorin. "I have already given up on Fíli and Kíli, but Arya…"

"I know", Robb sighed. "I'm worried too… uh, is your sword glowing, Your Majesty?"

Thorin pulled Orcrist from the scabbard and true, it was glowing bright blue.

"Orcs!" yelled Thorin. The others pulled out their weapons and the direwolves snarled. They gathered together and especially Bilbo and Thalia looked convincing standing by Thorin's side, their weapons glowing blue. Kíli put an arrow on the string of his bow, Fíli pulled out both his swords and Arya seemed nervous when holding Needle with both hands. Robb and Jon called Ghost and Grey Wind and told them to wait. Nymeria barely managed to avoid the first arrow that flew towards the Company.

"Kíli, shoot!" ordered Thorin and Kíli shot. The arrow hit its target, which is to say, the Orc archer's forehead. The Company decided to break up temporarily. Jon and Robb headed to the river with Grey Wind and Ghost, Thalia, Arya, Fíli and Kíli ran to the rocks with Nymeria and Thorin and Bilbo left for a small forest. The Orcs were confused by it for a moment, but they were smart enough to understand that they needed to do the same.

"How can they move in daylight?" asked Arya. "I thought they hated light and only moved when it was dark!"

"Apparently some can move also in daylight but it can't be nice for them!" answered Kíli. Then he turned around quickly and shot another Orc.

"Thalia, can you do something?" shouted Fíli. Thalia thought of it and then halted.

"Arya's your responsibility", she said. "I'll take care of them. Run!"

Fíli, Kíli and Arya took shelter behind a boulder, Nymeria closely behind them, as Thalia pulled Aegis in front of her and charged. The shield managed to drive away the most cowardly Orcs. Unfortunately most of the Orcs knew no fear and Thalia was forced to fight for her life. Fíli ran to help her out. Their pace on beheading Orcs was good, but they still drove them near the boulder behind which Kíli and Arya were hiding. Fíli had told them to stay hidden, but…

Suddenly one of the Orcs threw Fíli against the rocks nearby. Thalia would've run to help but she had her hands full with her own opponents. Kíli shot again. The arrow hit an orc that had approached Fíli with his axe raised up high. Meanwhile Arya was throwing the orcs fighting Thalia with stones.

"Oi, uglies!" shouted Kíli and stood up. "Get away from my brother!"

Kíli and Arya started to run towards the bank most of the orcs behind them. Their plan was working. Thalia took care of the rest of the Orcs and then went to check on Fíli. He had a nasty wound in his forehead and most likely some broken bones, but he was alive. Thalia sighed with relief. Thank gods the Dwarves were tough folk. Thalia dag a first-aid kit from her rucksack and started to clean Fíli's wound. It wasn't as deep as she had feared but it was bleeding rather nastily nevertheless.

"Kee… is Kíli okay…?" Fíli managed.

"I don't know", answered Thalia woefully. "He and Arya just saved our lives but…"

Fíli grimaced out of pain. Something grey sprinted past them and Thalia shrieked, "Nymeria, NO!" Nymeria did not obey but ran to aid Arya.

* * *

Kíli and Arya were running for their lives while the arrows of the Orcs flew past them. Kíli had a fleeting fancy to turn around and mock their pathetic aim but saw best not to jinx their so far unbelievably good luck. Arya looked like she was scared and extremely brave at the same time, as odd as it sounded.

"It's working!" exclaimed Arya. "They really went after us!"

"I know!" answered Kíli. "Now shut up and run!"

Suddenly the arrows halted. Robb, Grey Wind and Nymeria had reached the Orcs and were now slaughtering them one at the time. Robb didn't seem to mind where he happened to stick his sword, since his main purpose was to kill those that threatened his sister. One Orc stuck his trident to Grey Wind's leg. Grey Wind howled of pain (there was no wound, though) and limped away. Nymeria sank her teeth to that Orc's arm and was struck unconscious. Arya let out a furious scream. No one would hurt her direwolf and get away with it. She ran to Robb's aid, running Needle through the Orcs' armours. Kíli had switched his bow to sword and beheaded an orc that was just about to hurt Arya.

"You two, get away from here!" ordered Robb. "I'll be fine – AAH!"

An arrow pierced Robb's left shoulder. Kíli and Arya tried to help him but were struck unconscious like Nymeria. Grey Wind whimpered silently. He wanted to help but knew he couldn't manage alone.

"Mission accomplished", grunted one of the Orcs. "Take the Dwarf and the girl and head for Khazad-dûm."

"Leave… her alone", wailed Robb. The arrow was buried deep in his shoulder. The pain was burning and close to excruciating.

"And silence him", the Orc ordered. The rest of the Orcs started to run south, Kíli and Arya hanging on their shoulders. Only two remained: the one who told others what to do, and another who used bow and arrows. He first shot Robb to his thigh out of pure sadistic glee. Robb let out a cry of pain. He waited for the third arrow that would hopefully release him from the agony…

"Oi! Step away from my brother!"

Jon and Ghost attacked the two Orcs. Jon first sliced off the archer's both hands and then his head. Ghost took down the other one. Then Jon helped Robb to lean on a tree. Ghost pushed Grey Wind and Nymeria up with his snout. Nymeria looked very miserable.

"Robb, are you alright?" asked Jon. "Where's Arya?"

"Arya… they… they took her", Robb moaned. "Hurts…"

"You'll be fine", said Jon. "I promise you'll be fine."

"Robb! Jon!"

Thalia ran there followed by Thorin and Bilbo helping Fíli. They both were covered with blood but seemed mostly unharmed. Thalia examined Robb's injuries before grabbing her first-aid kit again. Bilbo came to help her by preparing the disinfectant.

"Okay, this is quite basic but I'll need help", Thalia told them. "Thorin, Jon, you need to hold Robb because I don't have any anesthetics."

Jon grabbed Robb's arm and Thorin grabbed the other after helping Fíli to sit down. Robb looked like he could pass out so Thalia slapped him. Robb cursed in spite of the pain in his shoulder and that was when Thalia pulled out the arrow. Bilbo gave her cotton wool coated with disinfectant and some gauze.

"We're lucky the most common injuries among the Hunters are arrows in wrong places", Thalia commented while cleaning the wound. "Robb, you're so fortunate. Neither of the arrows hit any vital veins."

"I'm not worried about that", sighed Robb. He gave Fíli an anguished look. "Fíli, I'm so sorry. I tried to protect them, Kíli and Arya, but…"

"Orcs are tough", answered Fíli and rubbed his forehead, for it ached. "It wasn't your fault, Robb. I tried to protect them too. Much help it gave them."

"Now see here, self-pity isn't going to get you anywhere", snapped Bilbo. "So be quiet and just try to get better."

"I'm taking off the other arrow now", said Thalia. "Thorin, if you could hold Robb again, please."

Thorin did as he was asked. Robb bellowed of the pain again and Thalia cleaned and bound the wound as quickly as she could. Both wounds were itching and it was so irritating, but as Jon said, it was better than being dead. "I couldn't bear it if you were killed. I vowed myself that I'd look after you, Robb Stark, and that's what I'll do." Grey Wind laid his head on Robb's lap and whimpered a little. Robb gave him an absentminded scratch behind his ear and said, "You were brilliant, Grey Wind. As were you, Nymeria." Nymeria gave Robb's cheek a quick lick.

Fíli got up, holding his head for a moment, and blurted out, "We must go. Those filths have Kee and Arya. We have to rescue them!"

"Sit down, Fíli", ordered Thorin. "We are not going anywhere before you and Robb are in better shape."

"I won't leave Kíli!"

"Fíli, calm down", said Bilbo. "None of us is going to leave Kíli and Arya but Thorin is right. You or Robb won't be much help in that state."

"Besides, we have three direwolves and an awful lot of orc smell", added Thalia. "Tracking them down won't be a problem. Now sit, you might as well have a slight concussion. Thank the gods you Dwarves are thick-headed, literally and figuratively."

Thorin gave Thalia's shoulder a gentle slap, like a father scolding his teenage daughter. Thalia couldn't help a grin despite the serious situation. She finished the bindings so that nothing was hanging and said that both Fíli and Robb would better lie down for a couple of hours. Neither of the two was satisfied with the decision but they couldn't really complain because in that state they sure weren't much help. Fíli was squirming, though, as if he was uncomfortable. Nobody could blame him, Jon and Robb the least of all.

"I wish Gandalf were here", Bilbo muttered while fetching water from the river with Thorin. "Fíli and Robb would be up on their feet already. Not that I wouldn't appreciate Thalia's skills, I really do, but I also understand Fíli's urge to go look for Kíli and Arya."

Thorin sighed deeply. "I think the worst part here is that we cannot know if they are still alive. If we even vaguely knew where the Orcs are taking them, it would help a lot. Oh, Dís will kill me if I return to Erebor without Kíli."

Bilbo pressed his hand on Thorin's shoulder. "We will find them, I know we will."

"If only I had your faith", said Thorin and corked the flagons. They walked back in silence. Fíli, Thalia, Robb and Jon were also quiet. Only the direwolves made little noises. Thalia was just changing Fíli's bandage. Fíli looked like he could burst into tears. Thorin sat next to him and hugged him after Thalia was done. And that was when Fíli stopped caring whether or not he behaved like the heir to the throne and cried on Thorin's shoulder. Thorin could remember only one similar situation. Fíli and Kíli had been only children. Kíli had been climbing trees and out of carelessness had fallen. Fíli had tried to tell him to come down before it happened and been greatly upset when the accident had occurred. He had blamed himself for not taking care of his little brother no matter how much Thorin and Dís assured him it wasn't his fault.

"Fíli", said Thorin silently. "We will find Kíli, and Arya, too. I promise you."

"Actually we can take off now if you like", announced Thalia. She and Jon had helped Robb up and checked he could move. "Under normal circumstances I'd keep Robb put for a while longer, but screw 'em now." She went to collect Kíli's arrows and put them into her own quiver. "We have some hunting to do."

Fíli dried his eyes and got up. "So we do", he said. "Nobody messes with my baby brother, nobody."

Jon and Robb said the same of Arya. Out of the blue Robb slapped his forehead.

"Gosh I'm an idiot. I forgot to tell you that one of the orcs said where they'll be taking Kíli and Arya."

The rest of the Company let out an astonished noise. Thorin pulled up his map and asked, "Where are they taking them?"

Robb looked at the map. The names of places didn't sound at all like the one he had heard. "It's not here. That orc spoke of Khazad-something."

Thorin and Fíli shared a relieved glance.

"Khazad-dûm is Moria's name in Khuzdul", said Thorin. "We need to go. We have a long orc hunt before us."

* * *

Please don't kill me! It had to happen, just saying.

And no worries, the blood on Thorin and Bilbo was orc blood... mostly.


	10. Chapter 10

Yay, chapter 10! More of Thalia's background in this chapter.

The theme song of this chapter is the beautiful Keep Holding On by Avril Lavigne. Please listen to it while reading this chapter.

* * *

Chapter ten

Where Bilbo and Thorin Get on Each Other's Nerves

**~..~**

They were ready to leave in ten minutes, out of which Thalia spent five putting on her breastplate, greaves and arm guards. She said she wanted to be properly prepared for the next battle, whenever it might be. No one even bothered to be surprised that there were such items in Thalia's rucksack. Actually Thorin said that he wouldn't be surprised if he one day found a whole library in there. Thalia laughed and said there was no such thing but thanks for the idea. Then they started to hunt some Orc. Grey Wind, Ghost and Nymeria took the scent from the dead Orcs and got going. Robb was able to run short distances fairly quickly but because of his leg he had to take breaks frequently, and whenever he was on a break, so were the others. Jon changed the bandage as often as necessary.

"We're moving on too slowly", Robb huffed when they had run a bit over ten miles or so. "Oh I wish I had been more careful…"

"Shut up", snapped Jon. "Bilbo told you self-pity isn't getting you anywhere. So just get a grip and try to cope."

"I'm trying!" whined Robb. "But this damn leg just hurts so much!"

"We know it does, but it practically was your idea to get going already, so you can only blame yourself", sighed Thalia.

The orcs seemed to follow the river Andúin. The Company thought for a moment that they could take a shortcut and run on the field because that way they could catch the orcs faster, but there was the risk that they would lose the trail. Thalia was constantly examining the dips on the ground, and also bloodstains. For everyone's relief she announced that the blood was not from Kíli or Arya. "Yuck, clear orc blood. Disgusting."

"Ew, did you taste it?" groaned Fíli.

"How else would I know what blood it is?" asked Thalia rhetorically. "Anyway, we're in the right direction. They passed this place about an hour ago."

"Good, let's move on", said Thorin. And the carried on running until the night fell. Jon and Fíli would've wanted to go on a bit longer but the others said there was no point. Even though the moon did light the way a bit, it was still so dark that they could hardly see past their noses. They couldn't afford to lose the trail just because they weren't able to see. So they put up a camp much more melancholically than usually. They hardly even spoke to each other and it made everyone feel bad. They had grown used to Fíli and Kíli being idiots whenever they put up their camp, so it felt somehow unnatural to see only Fíli leaning on a trunk with such a serious expression. It was also weird to camp without seeing Arya fighting against air with Needle. Naturally Jon and Robb felt the worst about it, but also Thalia was extremely shocked of Arya's kidnapping. Still, she wouldn't let it make her feel down. She remained as unyielding and fierce as always, especially when bringing Fíli some food.

"I'm not hungry", said Fíli.

"I know, I'm not either, but you need to gather your strength", answered Thalia strictly. "You're more for use on this journey if you're not completely half-dead."

Thalia thrust Fíli the plate and went to fill her own. The rest of the Company didn't seem to have an appetite of any sorts. Robb was rolling his meal on his plate and Jon didn't so much as nibble his. Meanwhile Thorin ate his meal quickly and then went to take his watch. Bilbo decided to go with him.

"Mum will kill me", muttered Fíli. "I promised her I'd keep Kee safe."

"Hey, they're still alive", said Thalia and pressed her hand on Fíli's shoulder. "I'm sure they are. Still, gotta say that I know how you must feel right now. I do know what it's like to lose a family member."

Fíli gave Thalia a surprised look. She hadn't really shared anyone anything about herself except for her divine heritage and her life as a Hunter of Artemis. Thalia smiled with sadness in her eyes.

"What I'm about to tell you now is something I've never told anyone, not even my best friends Annabeth and Luke. Oh well, Luke's not my friend anymore but that's beside the point. I, too, had a little brother once. Had. His name was Jason. He was the cutest little child you've ever seen. My terms with my mom weren't good and I'd already planned running away but Jason gave me a reason to stay. Mom wasn't… the most stable case. She drank a lot, pulled stupid stunts, was everywhere in the gossip media. She managed to pull herself together when Dad started visiting her again. I was seven. After some time Jason was born. I didn't trust Mom to look after him so I stayed."

"Where are you heading with this story?" asked Fíli.

"I'll tell you when I'm done", answered Thalia. "Anyway, at some point Dad stopped coming by again. That's the thing with gods, they don't stay around. Mom was furious and blamed it all on Hera, Dad's wife, the goddess of marriage. Mom was sure that Hera haunted us – which probably was also true. Well, when Jason was two, she took us to this park. I remember it being weird because Mom never took us anywhere. I held his hand – he'd only recently learned to walk – when Mom asked me to get something from the car. I wouldn't have wanted to leave Jason alone with Mom but it was only for a couple of minutes. When I went back... Mom was crying hysterically and told me Jason was gone. She said Hera had taken him and he was as good as dead. I thought Mom had finally lost it and so I ran around the park looking for him. Eventually Mom had to drag me away.

"It was the last straw, Jason's disappearance. I ran away from home and never went back, not even when Mom was killed a couple of years back. Couldn't bear the pain. The worst part is that I still don't know whether or not Jason's still alive. I'd be so relieved if someone told me he was dead. Wouldn't have to live not knowing."

Thalia pressed her lips together, hoping it would prevent her from crying. She wasn't absolutely sure why she had shared this with Fíli, someone she had only known for about two months, but it did feel good. It felt right. Fíli put his plate on the ground and gave Thalia a tight hug.

"I'd like to say something but I don't know what", he said quietly.

"It's alright", sighed Thalia. "I'm not sure either why I even told you that story. Maybe I just wanted it off my heart. Yes, and also tell you that there is hope, loads of it." Thalia looked at Fíli intensively. "Even if they've killed Kíli and Arya, we'll find them. And in whatever shape we find them in, we'll beat the shit out of the Orcs that kidnapped them."

"We have a deal", said Fíli. Then he happened to glance at the direction where Thorin and Bilbo were sitting. "Oh my, would you look at that."

Thalia looked at the same direction and smirked. "Well well, if they'd finally manage to do something."

Thorin and Bilbo had returned from the watch (which hadn't made any sense whatsoever, they'd practically just walked) and were now sitting against another trunk very close to each other. Jon and Robb had fallen asleep a while ago, so Fíli and Thalia decided to do the same – or rather pretend to sleep. If something did happen they didn't want to miss it for the world. It just was so painful to watch Thorin and Bilbo just sitting over there, not even giving each other a glance. Fíli whispered Thalia as silently as he could, "Do I give a push already?" Thalia kicked him in the shin to sign no. They'd wait a bit longer though it was difficult to pretend sleeping and try to watch at the same time.

"Go to bed", said Thorin eventually. "I'll keep watch."

"Then I'll do it too", Bilbo said sharply. "I am not going to let you be alone, not at a time like this. Other times, maybe, but not today."

"Bilbo, I am not going to discuss this. Off to the bedroll with you."

"Oooh, a lovers' fiery spat", whispered Thalia and Fíli had to put his fist into his mouth so that he wouldn't have burst into laughter. Bilbo was still sitting stubbornly where he was.

"Whether you want it or not, I'll stay with you", he snapped.

Thorin was almost boiling. Fíli and Thalia did everything they could not to start laughing and give themselves away. The only unpleasant thing about the situation was that Kíli wasn't there to share it with them.

"You are trying my patience, Halfling", growled Thorin. Bilbo didn't so much as bat an eye. He had grown used to Thorin's threats long ago.

"And your pride is getting on my nerves", he said.

"That is very un-Hobbit-like behaviour", Thorin pointed out sharply.

"Ugh, I know. But un-Hobbit-like or not, I will keep watch with you. And I'm not discussing of it."

"Kiss already, kiss already, kiss already", Thalia repeated a silent mantra. At least so far their wait wasn't rewarded. Bilbo and Thorin were very close to each other but nothing happened. Thorin only sighed deeply and said, "Very well. I do not feel like arguing now that Kíli and Arya are missing."

"Drat", Fíli muttered to Thalia. "How can they be so stupid?"

"We better change the plan B of all plan B's", Thalia whispered back. "I'll hold Bilbo, you Thorin, and then we make them kiss. And from now on, let's call this thing Operation Bagginshield."

"Why? And what does Bagginshield stand for?" asked Fíli.

"It's a combination of Baggins and Oakenshield", explained Thalia. "In the States you'd call it a shipping name. You get it combining the names of the people you wish to put together, or ship. Do you get it?"

"Yes, I do. It's a good name, let's use it."

Thalia grinned. "And do we have a deal with the plan B of all plan B's?"

"We do."

"And what are you two whispering here?" asked Thorin somewhere above them.

"Private matters", answered Thalia with a complete poker face. Thorin raised his brow but didn't ask any further questions, just told them to sleep. They would continue the Orc hunt at first light. Fíli tried to find a good position but he couldn't sleep. He hadn't slept without Kíli next to him since he was born. Or, well, they had a few times, but those had only been punishments of their pranks. And those times neither of them had slept for more than two hours at most and then had fallen asleep on the couch together the following afternoon.

"Thalia, are you sleeping yet?" Fíli breathed.

Thalia turned around and said, "No. What is it? You're not in pain, are you?"

"No. I just cannot sleep without Kíli. It doesn't feel right to even think of sleeping without him snoring and putting his arm over my face."

"Oh, right", smiled Thalia. "Do you want me to replace him temporarily?"

"If it's not too much trouble", said Fíli a bit shyly. Thalia just smiled, mostly because of relief, because she had feared Fíli to be in pain. She crawled beside the Dwarven prince and said, "It's no trouble at all. You need to sleep and if this helps then good. Do you want me to stick my arm on your face?"

"Well no", admitted Fíli. "Only Kíli may do so."

"Good, because it'd be weird if I did it", giggled Thalia and closed her eyes.

* * *

The Company woke long before sunrise. They didn't eat much, only enough for them to run for hours. Thorin also told them to go relieve themselves now because they couldn't stop for that for a long time. They were in a hurry. They had slept only for four, maybe five, hours but they still had lost many precious moments. Yet Thalia was absolutely sure they could catch the Orcs. Bilbo was the only one who shared her trust and optimism. Thorin, Fíli, Robb and Jon were all more or less sceptic about it. Thalia gave the direwolves one of Kíli's arrows to smell and they immediately caught the scent. The second day of hunt had begun.

Fíli and Robb were still running a bit more slowly than the others, but the rest of them could have sworn they healed unnaturally fast. No one could say why it was so but the main thing was that they were on the move. Fíli, though not cherishing much hope of finding Kíli alive, had apparently gained more energy from the conversation with Thalia (which he had promised to keep a secret, as requested by the Hunter), because not even Thorin had seen him so determined before.

Bilbo was the first one to be completely exhausted. They had run for maybe three hours and the sun had risen but was not yet fully up. They halted for five minutes so that Bilbo could ride Ghost again. This did not appear to slow Ghost down at all. He ran just as fast as Grey Wind and Nymeria and also stayed on the trail. After them and Bilbo was Thalia, running almost as fast as them. From time to time she got up on a big rock to examine the surroundings. She had shown the other Company her binoculars the same morning.

"Thalia, what do your eyes see?" asked Thorin when Thalia had once again got up on a rock.

"The Orcs are far off", she replied. "I can only see them as a blur. They've increased their pace!"

"Then hurry up, everyone!" exclaimed Bilbo. "We don't have time to waste!"

They ran for many more hours until Robb's leg started to ache again. After checking the situation Thalia stated that the wound had reopened. Everyone groaned upon hearing it. They were still hunted by bad luck. Thalia cleaned and bound the wound as quickly as she could but they still had to admit that Robb couldn't run anymore, at least not that day. Fíli kicked the ground out of frustration. He couldn't bear another night without Kíli. The previous night he had only just managed to fall asleep but he knew he the next night would be extremely painful.

"I'm so sorry", said Robb while leaning against Grey Wind.

"It's not your fault, brother", snapped Jon. "We can blame no other than those cursed orcs."

Thalia dag through the whole first-aid kit but found nothing to stop the bleeding. The bindings wouldn't be enough. They found some dried plants from Bilbo's rucksack that helped a bit but didn't stop the bleeding completely. It was frustrating to all of them. The wound hadn't fortunately become inflamed. Thalia also checked Robb's wound on his shoulder and Fíli's head, now that she was at it. Both wounds had started to scar, which was a good thing.

"I suppose we must stay here for now", sighed Thorin.

"No way!" shouted Robb. "We must carry on! If something happens to Arya, I… I…"

Thalia let out an impatient huff, piled up the plants on Robb's thigh and bound the bindings so tight that he cried out of pain. Then she said that they would go on no matter what.

"If Robb's suicidal enough to continue, then we better get going", she said strictly. Jon helped his brother up asking whether it would be wise. Thalia snapped that they had to since Robb insisted so much. Besides they couldn't waste the valuable daylight. And so they carried on. Robb didn't let a sound of whimpering because of his leg but everyone could see he was relieved when they stopped at nightfall.

Fíli sat on the ground and started to hone his swords, though there was only so much use in it. His swords were already so sharp that one could've cut off the head of a fully armoured Orc with one swing. Thorin and Bilbo knew Fíli, though, and knew he always honed his swords when he was nervous. Nervous was also the word to describe Thorin's state of mind. He had never been very hopeful with this rescue mission but now he was truly starting to lose hope. But he had to try. He knew all too well that Dís would kill him if he ever tried to return without Kíli. Even finding him dead would be better than nothing.

Jon and Robb ate quickly and then fell asleep. Fíli did the same, though he couldn't catch sleep. But he wouldn't ask Thalia to sleep with him another time. His pride did not allow it. There was nothing wrong with Thalia, she was actually quite a pleasant sleeping partner, she just… she just wasn't Kíli. She seemed to understand it without any words because she offered to take the first guarding shift. Bilbo agreed without another word and went to sleep against Ghost. Before that he still tried to convince Thorin that they would succeed with the rescue mission, and as if to confirm his words he pressed his lips on the Dwarven king's forehead. Thalia was the only one to see how red Thorin became. She smiled by herself when Thorin laid next to Bilbo, only facing his back at the hobbit. Things truly started to progress. At least Thalia knew what to tell Fíli once he'd wake up.

* * *

And from now on Fíli and Thalia are something like best friends forever. The story Thalia told is from The Lost Hero of Heroes of Olympus series (sequel to Percy Jackson and the Olympians) and at this point she doesn't know Jason is still alive (since this fic happens around the same time as Percy Jackson and the Battle of the Labyrinth, the fourth PJ&O book).

Thalia explained shipping to Fíli pretty much the same way I explained it to my mum.

And Thorin and Bilbo are adorable but also pretty damn frustrating, just wanted to add that.


	11. Chapter 11

Whee, chapter 11, which marks we're half-way to where I am with the original Finnish version of this fic. And thank you for the lovely comment, **LadyDunla**! I'm so happy you like this fic!

And we are graced by Kíli and Arya's comeback after they've been on a short break in Hawaii... no, wait...

* * *

Chapter eleven

Where They Track Like Crazy

**~..~**

Arya's head was aching worse than ever. She had regained consciousness some time before she and Kíli were thrown onto the ground as if they were nothing more than luggage. Kíli was still knocked out, which was a surprise to Arya, because she knew the Dwarves were thick-skulled folk. As soon as her eyes got used to the darkness, she started to survey the situation. Her hands and legs were bound and the orcs had taken Needle from her but they hadn't spotted the hunting knife Thalia had given her. They had also taken Kíli's weapons – Arya spotted them leaning against a decaying trunk about ten yards from them. There were Orcs everywhere, though they all seemed to gather around a fire. They all looked different but each of them was big, malformed and hideous. Arya felt sick just looking at them. So she turned her gaze to Kíli. Kíli seemed more or less uninjured but it was hard to tell for the dark. Arya crawled closer whispering, "Kíli? Kíli, are you alright?"

Arya had to elbow Kíli several times before he opened his eyes. Kíli seemed to be suffering from an even worse headache than Arya at the moment.

"Gah… why do I feel like I'd challenged Dwalin to a drinking contest and lost?" he asked with a suffering expression. Then he seemed to remember what had happened. "Oh, Arya, are you okay?"

"Yes", answered Arya. They both were whispering; they didn't want to attract any attention to the Orcs. "Though my head hurts as well and my wrists are asleep."

"Mahal help us", groaned Kíli. "No weapons… this is not good at all. What will Uncle Thorin say…?"

"Kíli, I've got a weapon", whispered Arya. "They forgot to take my knife. If I were you I'd check your situation."

Kíli did as he was told and lo and behold they had forgotten his knife as well. A similar mischievous grin to one when he schemed with his brother spread on Kíli's face. Speaking of Fíli… Kíli felt bad when he remembered what had happened to Fíli. Was his brother still alive? That hit against the rocks had seemed so terrible. Still, something inside Kíli was sure that Fíli was fine. He'd know if his brother were dead. But at that moment Kíli was more worried about the circumstances he and Arya were in.

"Arya", Kíli breathed, "do you think we could cut the ropes?"

"We could manage that", answered Arya, though a bit unsure.

"Good. I'll cut them for you. Then go get our weapons and do the same to me."

Arya seemed nervous and even scared but turned around so that Kíli could cut her ropes. It took Kíli a good five minutes to get a proper hold on his knife (he was still wondering how damn stupid the Orcs had to be not to notice a hunting knife of noticeable size) and to the top of that two minutes to get it on Arya's ropes so that he wouldn't accidentally cause her any injuries. It was tricky because they had to be back to back. Freeing the legs would thankfully be easier.

"Right then", said Kíli. "I'll start now. Tell me instantly if I hurt you or when you get free."

Arya nodded and simultaneously kept an eye on the Orcs. They seemed to assume they were still knocked out because there were no guards around and they were basically minding their own business around the fire about two yards from Kíli and Arya's weapons. Arya tried not to feel sick while keeping an eye. The Orcs were so hideous. Kíli moved the knife slowly so that he wouldn't accidentally drop it. He had to get Arya out of ropes because she had a better chance to get their weapons unnoticed than he did. Arya was almost as good as Bilbo at remaining unnoticed.

"Kee, you're done", Arya breathed. She pulled her hands apart and rubbed her wrists. The ropes had been so tight that one could see the bright red marks in her wrists. Arya cut the ropes in her legs quickly and got up to get Needle, Kíli's bow, quiver and short sword. The orcs seemed not to notice though they saw well in the dark. Everything just flowed too well and it felt dangerous. Arya put Needle in her belt and the bow and the quiver on her shoulder. She was just pondering what to do with Kíli's sword when one Orc noticed she was gone. Arya ducked behind the trunk quickly.

"Oi! Where's that girl?" the Orc said with a deep growl. He walked to Kíli and pressed the tip of his spear against his throat. "You! Where did that girl go?!"

"She left", answered Kíli with a hoarse voice.

"'Left'?!" the Orc repeated. "What do you mean left?!"

"Got loose and escaped", Kíli clarified untruthfully. He hid his knife behind his back the best he could. Arya came slowly closer while the Orc continued interrogating Kíli, face disgustingly close to his. She was five metres from them when the orc found Kíli's knife.

"Well well well", said the Orc with sadistic glee. "Got loose my arse. I should cut off your tongue for that lie, Dwarf, but unfortunately we were told to bring the heir of house Durin unspoiled. Can't say the same of the girl. She would make a very nice little toy…"

Hate flashed in Kíli's eyes. "Leave her alone! She's only a child!"

"Shut it!" the Orc growled and slashed a long wound into Kíli's face. He screamed for the pain. The Orc kicked him in his side and spat at him. "Be happy I don't hurt you more than that. An order is an order, though I'd love to damage your pretty _Elvish_ face –"

The Orc wasn't able to say more when his words were cut off by a nasty wet sound. He let out a horrid choking sound and fell dead on the ground, blood pouring from his neck. Arya ran to get her knife and spat at the Orc.

"That's for hurting my brother", she said. Then she cut off Kíli's ropes and gave him back his weapons just in time because the other Orcs attacked them as one horde. Arya had to kick them so that she could stick Needle to the places where their armour wasn't so thick. Kíli shot with ultimate precision but he did not have enough arrows and fetching them in the dark was too hard. At some point he had to start saving them and switch to using his sword. Arya was fighting with both Needle and her knife with a surprising skill when considering no one had taught her how to fight using two weapons. However, two against a whole hoard of Orcs… it was hopeless.

"Kíli, this isn't working!" shrieked Arya. "There's too many of them, I can't hold them back any longer!"

Kíli tried to think. If only Fíli had been there; Fíli had always been better at making up emergency plans. It was also difficult to see in the dark though their eyes had got used to it. Soon, however, Kíli exclaimed, "I got an idea! Come on!"

Arya ran after Kíli after finishing off one more orc. "Where are we going?"

"Just come on, quickly!"

Arya nodded. She had full trust on Kíli and understood the plan as soon as she could see in the fire's light where they were going. They were running towards a forest. The forest seemed very thick, so in other words it did not seem anything where the Orcs would voluntarily go. They'd just have to reach it before the Orcs reached them. Kíli shot his last arrow into the throat of the nearest Orc, giving Arya some lead. Arya made it to the edge before screaming, "Kíli! Come on! Hurry!" Kíli was almost frightened of her desperate tone. Although he had only known Arya for two months or so, he had never even thought she could sound so scared. Kíli speeded up as much as he could and against all odd he made it to Arya before the Orcs could catch him. He grabbed her hand and they ran deeper into the woods. The Orcs did not seem to follow them there. They did not stop until the ground suddenly gave way and they fell into a dark tunnel.

* * *

"How long is it to Moria?" asked Jon when drawing a quick breath before continuing to run.

"I have no idea, I haven't been to this area for decades", answered Thorin. "I wouldn't even care to be now but we do have to save Kíli, Arya and that bloody map."

Fíli briefly explained Bilbo, Thalia, Robb and Jon that Thorin hated the area because the forest of Lothlórien was nearby. The place apparently was swarming with elves. In addition Moria was a place from which Thorin did not have good memories. At the battle that had taken place at the gates of Azanulbizar he had lost his father, brother and grandfather. They all knew the story of battle of Azanulbizar and understood why returning there could not have been pleasant for Thorin.

The direwolves were still on the trail thanks to Kíli's arrows that Thalia had taken into her care. They were all pleasantly surprised of their tracking skills. Especially Thalia was thrilled because without them she would've probably led the company astray despite her own remarkable skills. Thanks to Nymeria, Ghost and Grey Wind it did not happen.

"Thalia, check the surroundings again!" Thorin ordered. Thalia did as she was told. She would've checked them soon anyway but it was good that someone reminded her of it.

"Pah, can't see anything", she swore. "They've got quite a head."

"May I see?" asked Fíli. Thalia gave him the binoculars though there was nothing to see in the environment, as beautiful as it was. Fíli did lower the binoculars soon with a deep sigh.

The Company carried on for several hours without seeing anything strange. They had to be on trail, though, because the direwolves weren't stopping and from time to time Thalia pointed at some footprints in the ground. Sometimes she bent to examine the dried blood in the marks. She never said it was from Kíli or Arya, which was a sign that they hadn't been hurt on the journey. The blood was always from Orcs. They were probably caught into fights in the middle of everything, but because there were no bodies nearby, they didn't kill each other. On the other hand not many of them had survived from the attack a few days ago, two dozen at most. Thalia, Fíli, Robb and Jon had killed them a good deal, and none of those that had attacked Thorin and Bilbo had survived. Bilbo hadn't been fighting at all since the Battle of Five Armies, but had been satisfied when realising that he hadn't forgotten the old skills.

After some time they were taking a break again. Jon checked Robb's leg while Thorin and Bilbo were keeping watch. Thalia put the binoculars back to her eyes and hoped to see at least a tiny sign of Kíli and Arya being alive. Fíli was standing beside her with a worried look upon his face, but still clearly better than the days before this. He only had a scar on his forehead and didn't seem to be suffering even from a minor concussion (blessed be the thick skulls of Dwarves, Thalia had said). Mentally he was still as bad as he had been.

"Oh, Kíli, where are you?" Fíli mumbled to himself whilst Thalia was looking to south-west with the binoculars. Suddenly she let out a terrified breath.

"Oh no", she said.

"What? Don't say 'oh no'!" Fíli exclaimed. "'Oh no' what?"

Thalia gave Fíli the binoculars. "We won't have to look for those orc filths any longer."

Fíli let out a breath just as terrified as hers. He had seen the same Thalia had: a smoking pile consisting of Orc carcasses. Thalia told this to the rest of the Company. They moved at once. It wasn't more than five or six miles. Robb cursed his aching leg but kept up to the pace the best he could. Thorin, Fíli and Thalia were running after the direwolves (and Bilbo who was still carried by Ghost), all three of them extremely nervous. At that pace it took them forty-five minutes to reach the pile. There were dead Orcs everywhere outside the pile as well. Thorin ran amongst them shouting Kíli's name. Jon and Robb were shouting for Arya. Fíli had fallen on his knees, arms tightly around him. Never before had he felt such despair. Bilbo pressed his hand on his shoulder but did not know what he could've said. Fíli didn't want words. He wanted his brother.

Meanwhile Thalia was studying the ground near a burnt trunk with Nymeria. She paid no attention on Robb and Jon's sobs or Thorin's cry of pain when he kicked one dead orc. She was more interested in the scorched grass. She was feeling it with her fingers until she found something else than just grass. Nymeria poked it with her snout and revealed a piece of burnt rope. Thalia also noticed the way the grass had sunk.

"A Dwarf lay here", said Thalia to herself. Her face lit. "Fee! Come here! Quickly!"

Fíli came. "What is it?"

"Look at this", said Thalia and put the piece of rope in his hand. "A Dwarf lay here. And there", she pointed out a dip ten inches from the first, "lay something only slightly smaller, which means it has to be Arya! They managed to cut the ropes!"

"Are they alive?" asked Fíli. His heart was filled with senseless hope.

"They might just as well be", smiled Thalia enthusiastically. "Depends whether or not they managed to escape. It looks good, though. They got their weapons back because they're not here and some of the Orcs have arrows in their bodies. Though it seems to me some of them aren't Kíli's."

Thalia got up and started to examine the other dips. Thankfully they were very clear in the scorched grass. Fíli let Nymeria smell the rope and she started to follow Thalia.

"They ran", mumbled Thalia. The rest of the Company came where she, Fíli and Nymeria were, all equally confused. "Because the prints don't go straight, they had to fight while running. One of them was injured, though not badly."

"What is this?" Thorin demanded.

"Shush!" hissed Fíli. "Thalia and Nymeria are tracking. Kee and Arya might still be alive."

The faces of Robb and Jon were lit at once and Bilbo let out a relieved sigh. They hadn't got as good news as this was, not even if getting away from the Misty Mountains was counted in. Thalia and Nymeria were carefully following the prints and were soon accompanied by Grey Wind and Ghost. The prints crossed a lot so Thalia deduced that Arya and Kíli had been fighting for their lives. They were leading away from the pile of Orcs, though, and it was a good sign.

"At this point they start to go straight", said Thalia and Nymeria barked to back up her words. "They ran… and ended up in the forest." Thalia, Nymeria, Grey Wind and Ghost halted. They looked silently at the tall trees that looked almost golden.

"Oh no, this is not good", Thorin groaned. He had gone pale. "The damned Orcs drove them to Lórien."

"I don't care", snapped Fíli. "Lórien or not, I'll go look for them."

"Oh no you will not!" shouted Thorin. "Dwarves older and wiser than you have either got lost or gone mad in Lórien. One who goes there does not return the way they were, my father told me."

Fíli couldn't have cared less when he stepped past the first trees. He turned around and gave the others a scolding glance – aside from Thalia who was just behind him with Nymeria. Robb and Jon came next. The forest frightened them but it got better when they thought of Arya. Their sister would've most likely done the same if the orcs had kidnapped either one of them. Ghost and Grey Wind followed their masters tails waving. After thinking of it for a moment Bilbo followed them as well. Only Thorin remained outside the forest arms folded.

"Thorin, will you please just come and stop being such a baby", sighed Bilbo. "If we fin Kíli and you're not with us, he'll never forgive you."

"Yes but…"

"No buts, come on!" ordered Fíli and Thorin had a passing thought that he sounded like a king.

Thorin gritted his teeth but came along anyway. He, too, knew that Kíli would never forgive him if he wasn't there. The Company started to walk after the direwolves. Their sense of smell left everyone flabbergasted because usually a trail disappeared among other smells in a forest. The woods were quiet aside from a distant birdsong. They all were very nervous, but even so especially Bilbo and Thalia paid attention to the beauty of the place. There was clearly some sort of ancient power in the forest but it didn't feel so much wicked as it felt calming. Thalia usually felt so much like home in forests that she could've passed an elf but also Bilbo felt calmer than he had.

"We must stick together", said Thorin with a low voice. "If we meet the Elf queen who lives here, do not – say - anything. I hear she has such powerful magical abilities of which most can only dream."

"Uncle, don't make me any more nervous than I already am", Fíli pleaded.

"What if we all were to shut up?" suggested Jon.

"Seconding that one", Thalia turned around to say and then carried on following the direwolves.

Suddenly an arrow flew in front of Grey Wind's snout. Grey Wind jumped up and ran to hide behind Robb and Jon. Another arrow hit the ground only an inch from Thalia's foot. She darted back two steps and turned her pepper spray bottle into a spear just in case.

"Elves", huffed Thorin.

An Elf with long golden hair and a lightweight armour stepped from behind the trees. Although he was male, he was so beautiful that Robb and Jon let out a gasp and Thalia let the tip of her spear accidentally drop.

"You all breathe so loud that we could have shot you with our eyes closed and hands tied behind our backs", the Elf chuckled. "For your luck we have been waiting for you. It has been a while since the Dwarves of house Durin have last wandered in Lothlórien. There have never been Halflings here before, and not many of the race of Men often come here either."

"Fancy that", said Thorin under his breath. The Elf paid no attention on him because he had moved on to eye Robb. Robb was grasping his thigh and looked like he was about to pass out from the pain.

"Robb, what is it?" Jon panicked.

"His wound has become infected", said the Elf. He beckoned there two more Elves whose faces were covered by helmets. He gave them orders in Elvish and they lifted Robb on a stretcher. Jon tagged along with Grey Wind and Ghost when the Elves started to take Robb somewhere.

"Where are you taking them?" asked Thorin with a grunt.

"Do not worry, Thorin Oakenshield", said the Elf again with common tongue. "They are taking the lads to Lord Celeborn who is an exceptional healer. Yes, we know who you are. I also welcome you, Bilbo Baggins, Fíli of house Durin and Thalia Grace. My name is Haldir, and Lord Celeborn and Lady Galadriel sent me to meet you. Follow me, please."

"Wait", said Fíli. Haldir turned to see him. "Have you seen my brother or the sister of Jon and Robb? They both have dark hair, and Kíli's weapon of choice is a bow and arrows, and Arya's a sword and a knife."

Haldir smiled enigmatically. "Follow me and many of your questions will be answered. Lady Galadriel is waiting for you."

There was no choice for Thorin, Fíli, Bilbo and Thalia but to follow the Elves.

* * *

As you all probably know, calling a Dwarf "Elvish" is probably the worst insult you could possibly make.

And Arya called Kíli her brother because that's what he practically is to her. I bet Kíli didn't mind. He's probably just happy.

And binoculars for the win! Who needs Elves for anything when you can have Thalia with binoculars? Speaking of Elves, for some reason I like Haldir a lot so I had to get him into this story. We'll have to see if I could get Legolas somewhere.


	12. Chapter 12

Whee, chapter 12! A longed friend makes a comeback and we'll see what's up with Kíli and Arya. This is one of my favourite chapters, just to mention.

I changed the spelling on the names of different races and edited the previous chapters a bit, but not drastically. It was mainly spelling and word order (and some typos I only noticed now).

* * *

Chapter twelve

Where Kíli Makes Important Promises

**~..~**

Kíli ended up in the bottom of the tunnel with a loud _thump_ but he didn't hurt himself because there was some grass to soften the landing. Arya landed onto him a moment later with a small shriek.

"Oh, I'm sorry", she said and grimaced a bit.

"It's alright", assured Kíli. "I'm not hurt. Everything's fine."

Kíli helped Arya back on her feet and wiped the biggest chunks of soil off her. Arya hadn't hurt herself badly even in the skirmish: she had minor cuts and bruises in her face and arms but nothing worse than that. Besides, she wasn't even that worried about herself. She was more worried about the long wound in Kíli's face. It looked scary even though Kíli told her this one wasn't even the worst he had got. Nevertheless, Arya tore a piece out of her cloak and wiped off most of the blood the best she could.

"I wish Thalia were here", sighed Arya. "I have nothing to clean this wound with."

"Arya, I'll be fine", said Kíli. "Trust me, I have seen worse than this. That was one amazing throw, by the way. You're quite a hidden talent."

"Sheer beginner's luck", said Arya.

"Nevertheless, it was amazing, beginner's luck or not."

Arya chuckled a bit and dried the rest of the blood off Kíli's face. Then they checked they hadn't lost their weapons when they fell into the tunnel. Everything was where they were supposed to be. Kíli was almost astonished he hadn't lost one single one of his many knives. Their eyes started to adapt to the dark and they realised they were at the beginning of a new tunnel.

"Where do you think this'll lead?" Arya pondered.

"No idea but best we found out", answered Kíli. "We can't really stay here, now can we? Come, let's go."

Kíli took Arya's hand and they started to walk deeper into the tunnel. It seemed to be consisting of different types of dirt because the walls seemed dirtied with soil but every now and then some gravel dropped onto the road. It wasn't very scary place but it wasn't pleasant either, and since it was dark in there Kíli and Arya wanted to get out of there as soon as possible. During what felt like miles the tunnel made only two turns and thankfully didn't fork at all. At some point they ended up looking at a stairway. Neither of them could see where it ended but they didn't have any other options so they started to climb. Arya was squeezing Kíli's hand so tightly out of pure nervousness that somewhere in half-way of the stairs he halted and pressed his forehead against hers.

"Calm down", said Kíli. "You're perfectly safe. I promise. No one will hurt you as long as I'm alive, deal?"

Kíli offered his fist and Arya punched hers against it with a small smile on her face. They continued the climb. The stairs ended to a thick veil of leaves. Together Kíli and Arya opened it slightly. The sight was so beautiful that it nearly made them catch their breath. They were standing on a tall rock surrounded by a bunch of trees the leaves of which seemed to be golden even in the dark. The trees were taller than any of those either one of them had ever seen and they seemed to have buildings and stairways in them more than they could ever count. The air smelt fresh and even in the dark the place seemed peaceful and safe.

"Arya, I think we're in Lórien", whispered Kíli. "I've heard countless of stories of this place but I never thought I'd see it with my own eyes."

"Oh Kíli, I would have imagined you had enough faith to think you would", said suddenly a familiar voice on their left. Kíli and Arya almost jumped up for the fright.

"Gandalf!" exclaimed Kíli. "What… how are you… why…?"

"Easy now", Gandalf smiled. "I knew the Company would pass Lothlórien so I decided to stay and wait here until you did. Although I must admit I did not know you two would arrive before-handed until Lady Galadriel told me so a couple of hours ago. She told me you would use the emergency exit so here I have been waiting for you."

"Where on earth did you disappear when we had passed the Trollshaws?" asked Kíli.

"I was obliged to carry out some important things that simply could not wait", answered Gandalf. "I am sorry to have worried you all. But that wound looks bad, my lad. We best show it to the Lady and Lord Celeborn. It must be treated as soon as possible. It would also do good for Arya here, so she would not have to worry."

Arya looked down. She had a faint flush on her cheeks because it felt so strange to her to be so worried about Kíli. Well, of course she'd worry because of a friend, and Kíli was an important friend for her, but for some reason this worry felt different. Arya did not understand. Last time when she had been worried about someone this way had been some years ago when Jon had had a high fever. Gandalf put his hand over Arya's shoulder and led her and Kíli to a stairway that led high up to a tree. At the end of the stairway there was a huge hall made of wood, but which still shimmered like the most beautiful gemstone. Arya made a sigh out of enchantment.

"Do you like what you see, Arya Stark?"

The speaker was a very beautiful woman with impossibly long golden hair. She was wearing long white robes, as was the silvery-haired man standing beside her. She didn't look young but on the other hand she did not look old either. The correct word was timeless. Arya soon realised they both had to be Elves because they had pointed ears.

"I-I do, um, Lady Galadriel", stuttered Arya with a voice somewhat higher than normally. Galadriel smiled at her gently and Lord Celeborn took some steps towards them.

"Sit down", he said. "I shall treat your wounds."

Two chairs had appeared to the hall that certainly had not been there moments ago. Kíli and Arya bowed a little and sat. Celeborn took up a bottle that contained some sort of medicine. Kíli was squirming on his chair and looked very uneasy. He was nervous to be healed by Elves though he knew what wonderful healers they were. The enmity of years would not be quickly forgotten.

"Welcome to Caras Galadhon", said Galadriel. "I feel you are going to stay for a while so I do wish you make yourselves at home."

Celeborn made one drop of liquid fall from his bottle on Kíli's wound. Kíli yelped a bit because it stung. Celeborn paid no attention to it and proceeded to examine Arya's wounds. He only cleaned those gently and said they would heal in time.

"Now, you must be tired", resumed Galadriel. "Mithrandír will take you to your rooms. You may wash up and rest. We have left you clothes you can change into."

Kíli and Arya bowed again and left the hall with Gandalf. The thought of a bath sure sounded very tempting. On the other hand they weren't too thrilled of the idea of separated rooms. Arya did have her own room back at home in Winterfell but when she was on a visit somewhere she rather shared the guestroom with someone. She didn't like sleeping alone in strange places. Meanwhile Kíli had the same problem as his brother: inability to sleep alone regardless the place. Unlike Fíli, Kíli had never slept alone, without his brother. (Except of course whenever Uncle Thorin and Mother had used it as a punishment for their pranks.) Even the idea felt like it was utterly impossible. Kíli pressed his lips together and prayed all gods he knew that Fíli was alright. Fíli had to be alright, for who else could ever keep Kíli out of trouble? Or rather who else would get them out of the trouble they had got into together?

"Gandalf", said Arya, "what did Lady Galadriel call you? It sounded beautiful."

"Mithrandír is my name in Sindarin", explained Gandalf. "And you are right. The Elvish tongues are the most beautiful languages in the world, as are their speakers."

Kíli let out a snort but it was actually more of an automatic reaction. He didn't really even admit it to himself (let alone others), but he also thought the Elvish tongues were very beautiful – though nothing could ever compare to the Khuzdul lullabies sang by his mother.

Gandalf left Kíli and Arya to doors opposite to each other and bid them good night. Arya and Kíli seemed to feel physically ill because of the separation but they both still were tempted by the idea of a bath. They weren't disappointed. In the homely bathrooms of both rooms were a small bathtub and several vats of warm water. On the beds were the spare clothes Elves had made for them. Arya took off her coat, shirt, trousers and boots for the first time in a very long time and realised also how filthy she was. This bath would be a long one. She took off the braids Kíli had done and placed the clasps on the spare clothes. She would ask Kíli re-braid her hair when they met each other the next morning. Arya took water from a vat with a huge ladle and filled the bath slowly but surely. The water smelt of something she couldn't define but at any matter it was a good smell. In the sides there were several soaps that smelt of different flowers. Arya smiled. The Elves truly loved everything beautiful, scents included. Arya slipped into the bath and started to clean off the dirt of too many weeks.

Kíli could not have been more embarrassed. It was bad enough that he had to dress in Elven clothes (hopefully no one besides Arya would _ever_ know) but that he had to wash himself with soaps smelling of flowers? Ugh, no self-respecting Dwarf washed himself with a soap that smelt of roses. Flowery scents were for Dwarf ladies, if even for them. Kíli searched through all the soaps in hope at least one would've been odourless but he was granted no such luck. Cursed weed-eaters, they had done it on purpose! Kíli swore out loud in Khuzdul but decided to yield. He wanted to wash up, after all. Thank Mahal no one from home was present. They would never stop bullying him if anyone knew he smelt like human lass. He heard too much mockery already because against all odds his beard wasn't growing the way it should have. Kíli had no idea what was wrong. His beard just stubbornly refused to grow and it made him very sad. At this rate he would never find himself a mate because everyone thought he was _Elvish_. Blah. No one had said so out loud for a long time, not after Fíli had cut off the braids of three worst bullies, but Kíli still knew most Dwarves thought so.

Kíli had just bathed himself and changed into the clothes the Lady had offered (that were also of perfect fit, which was a bit scary, and were even quite bearable for Elvish clothes), when someone knocked the door of his room.

"Yes?"

"It's just me, let me in!" asked Arya's voice from behind the door. Kíli went to open and Arya came in with a comb stuck in her tangled hair. It took all he had for Kíli not to burst into laughter. Arya reminded so much of Fíli on bathing days – a similar bored expression on the face, comb stuck in the tangles.

"I think you need help", said Kíli. Arya gave him a frustrated nod. "Sit on the bed and I'll untangle your hair. Do you still have the clasps I gave you?"

"Of course I do", answered Arya and opened her right knuckle. The four clasps Kíli had given her were shimmering against her palm. Kíli smiled and started to untangle her hair with both the comb and his fingers. He had noticed that the quality of Arya's hair was surprisingly similar to Fíli's, so it didn't create too much trouble for him to get the tangles off.

"Do you want the braids back?"

"Absolutely. I've already grown used to them."

Kíli had finished two braids and was working on third when Arya asked, "Why don't you have any braids? Fíli and Thorin both have them but you don't. Are you rebelling or something, or is there something else behind the whole thing?"

"Arya, that is a very, very personal question", answered Kíli. "If I didn't regard you as my sister I doubt I'd bother to answer at all. But now that you asked, I can tell you that I always let the world know I'm having my rebellious streak but the truth is a whole other business. I don't have any braids because when I was very young, younger than you are now, another Dwarf cut them off out of mere spite."

"Was it that bad?" asked Arya.

"There aren't many insults among Dwarves worse than that", explained Kíli and finished the third braid. "Fíli did pay back that bully and his friends, and I'm very glad he did, but since that day I haven't braided my hair or let anyone else do that for me."

"Why exactly…?"

"Because of my looks. The beards start growing when the Dwaflings are still in the cradle but I almost had to wait until I came of age before there could be seen any growth. The subject became a real laughing stock. The other heir of Durin can't grow himself a beard. It was embarrassing for my whole family. I got bullied, a lot. In addition there were some twats who got in their mind the idea that I was Elvish, which became another laughing stock. I can't remember if Thorin and Fíli have ever been so angry. Fíli got himself into all kinds of trouble after beating some of the bullies into pulp."

Arya was angry. She turned her head so suddenly that Kíli had to let go of the fourth braid he had just been finishing.

"But that's outrageous!" she exclaimed furiously. "What the hell was wrong with those Dwarves? It's awful to bully someone because of something they can't help!"

"Arya, turn your head, please", asked Kíli. "You'll ruin the braid. At any matter it was a long time ago and I won't let it bother me any longer. I'm not bullied anymore either. No one dares after my input in reclaiming Erebor."

Kíli finished the braid and then asked Arya to hand the last clasp so he could secure it. Arya was still boiling with rage, of which Kíli was actually quite thankful. No one besides Fíli, Mother or Uncle Thorin had ever been so angry for him that way. Kíli almost took pity on any Orc that had the misfortune of meeting Arya Stark in the future. The poor things did not know what was about to hit them.

"Did you finish it?" asked Arya after several silent moments.

"I did", answered Kíli. "Right, you best go to bed now. You'll need some sleep."

Arya was quiet for another moment before asking with hardly audible voice, "May I sleep here this night? My room is very beautiful and comfortable, but I don't really want to be alone."

Kíli couldn't help a smile. He didn't want to sleep alone either. "Be my guest. I've been told to snore, then, so try to bear it."

Arya went to fetch Needle and her knife quickly, because as she put it, she felt safer if she knew she had them at her reach. Kíli knew the feeling better than well. After the Battle of Five Armies he hadn't been able to sleep for six months without having at least a knife on his nightstand. Arya crawled to the bed right next to Kíli but didn't fell asleep straightaway.

"Do you think the others are in our trail?" she asked.

"Most likely yes", answered Kíli. "If Fee hasn't been hysterically running along the riverside of Andúin these past few days, I promise I'll eat my bow. And I don't think your brothers, Thalia, Uncle Thorin or Bilbo would even consider leaving us." Kíli stroked Arya's hair gently because he didn't want to mess it so soon after getting it untangled. "If I know them at all, they are right behind us. How near or far, that I can't say, but they'll find us eventually. I'm certain of it."

"What about those Orcs?" Arya continued.

"I think Galadriel and Celeborn have ordered their soldiers to shoot them. The Elves like everything beautiful and pretty so much that I don't think they'll ever let anything as ugly as Orcs reside so close to their borders."

Arya nodded and closed her eyes. It didn't take long until she was completely asleep. Kíli wrapped his arms around her the same way Fíli had wrapped his around him so long ago – or that's how it felt, at least. When had his life become like this? When had they started to spend most of their year running around Middle-Earth? Kíli looked at Arya's sleeping face and felt a tad envious. What he wouldn't have given to be a child again, preferably at home. As adventurous as Kíli was, in his heart he truly preferred staying home. Then he rubbed his eyes out of sleepiness. He and Arya had had a long evening. He wasn't sure how late it was but judging from his weariness it was very late. Right before falling asleep Kíli kissed Arya's forehead gently and promised to protect her now and always. And that was when, neither of them knowing what happened, Kíli of house Durin truly became brother to Arya of house Stark.

Kíli and Arya woke the next morning to sun shining straight into their eyes. Arya moaned and accidentally turned so much that she fell on the floor.

"Flaming…" Arya swore with one of the curses Thalia had taught her. She leaned on the side of the bed and got up. "Why aren't there any curtains here?"

"Beats me", said Kíli. "That's an excellent question. You're not hurt, are you?"

"No, not really, I've fallen off bed before", answered Arya. "Though usually it's because Nymeria has nudged me. I felt so irritated that I had to curse."

Kíli laughed. "Just make sure you don't use that word if Thorin or Bilbo can hear you or they'll start yelling at you."

Arya couldn't help but laugh either. Then Kíli got up after noticing someone had brought them breakfast. The breakfast mostly consisted of different fruit but there also were several sandwiches with meat. Apparently these Elves knew something about the food preferences of their guests. Kíli had not forgotten the time in Rivendell when they had only got vegetables. Meanwhile Arya noticed that their own clothes had been placed on a chair, clean and neatly folded.

"I have to admit, Galadriel and Celeborn aren't bad hosts", Kíli stated. He picked up a green apple, studied it as if to check there was nothing suspicious in it and took a bit. He'd never eaten a better apple and neither had Arya.

"I almost don't want to leave this place", she said. "I really wouldn't leave if there wasn't this one place here in Middle-Earth that I wish to see before going home."

"And what might that place be, pray tell?" asked Kíli. Arya laughed shortly.

"Erebor, of course. Do you think I'd miss seeing it after all those stories?"

"Fair point. Well, if there is any time for it, you are most welcome."

Kíli and Arya ate slowly considering they both were starving. They both had started to think where the rest of the Company was at that moment. Had any of them given up hope yet? Kíli couldn't help a sigh when he thought of Fíli. His brother was most likely sick of worry (Kíli refused to even think of the option where Fíli had been killed). Arya, in turn, was thinking of Robb and Jon, but also of Nymeria. Nymeria had got a very nasty blow. If only she were alright… if only they all were. Arya stood up and went to Kíli's bathroom to change. The Elven dress was very comfortable and nice to wear but Arya liked it better in her own clothes. Kíli did the same when she was ready. Then there was knocking on the door and Gandalf came in.

"Oh good, you're all ready", chuckled the wizard. "You are right on time. Come on."

"On time for what?" wondered Kíli whilst helping Arya to tie Needle to her belt.

"You'll see", said Gandalf with a knowing smile. Kíli and Arya shared a suspicious glance. They couldn't always trust Gandalf's schemes but this time his smile told them that the surprise would be pleasant, whatever it was.

* * *

And I do wonder what that surprise might be...? xD

I have all these different headcanons regarding why Kíli doesn't have any braids but the one described here is my favourite. If you really think of it, on Dwarven standards Kíli isn't the most attractive male. He doesn't have much beard or flamboyant braiding and he's leaner than your everyday average Dwarf.

That's also my favourite headcanon regarding Kíli's close to non-existent beard. I also have a headcanon that when he's older he still keeps it shorter than most Dwarves because it's easier to pracise archery with a short beard.

Anyway, this chapter was one of the hardest I'd written at the point because I had to keep scrolling FotR and check if all my Lórien facts are correct. It was a bloody nuisance, next time I'll use Internet. I also had to check whether Mithrandír was Sindarin or Quenya. I just wanted to be sure.

I also like where Kíli and Arya's relationship is going :D they're such cuties, don't you think?


	13. Chapter 13

I do love to have quick updates. This chapter was something of a milestone for me while writing this fic. You'll see why ;)

And do listen to either Misty Mountains (because of Richard Armitage's voice oh by _valar_) or Song of the Lonely Mountain by Neil Finn while reading this. (Or both if you like.)

* * *

Chapter thirteen

Where Thorin Understands Something Essential

**~..~**

In a way Bilbo had expected Lórien to remind him of the halls of Mirkwood's Elvenking (which had not been very homely at all), so he was surprised to see the tall trees and the buildings on their branches. The sight was very impressing and homely at the same time, as strange as it sounded. Thalia was just as enchanted of what she saw as Bilbo was. Fíli didn't even concentrate, he was thinking of Kíli and Arya. And Thorin was carefully keeping his face a grumpy mask though in truth he was also very impressed.

"Wow, you don't see stuff like this every day", sighed Thalia.

"This place is very unique even on Middle-Earth's scale, good Thalia", Haldir turned around to tell. "Come. You may admire the places later. The Lady of Light awaits you."

Fíli sank his hand to Nymeria's fur when Haldir led them to a long stairway that in turn led high up to a tree. Nymeria nudged him gently with her muzzle.

"Curse these blasted stairs", grumbled Thorin. None of the Company was exactly thrilled of the long stairway, Thorin least of all. He simply didn't manage. They had all run for about one thousand miles and now they were expected to climb a mile-long stairway? Damn it all.

"Thorin, we're almost there", said Bilbo quietly so that he wouldn't have offended Haldir. Thorin grunted something and Bilbo couldn't help but roll his eyes. Dwarves and their stubbornness would be is downfall one day. But in spite of all that Bilbo knew too well that he couldn't manage without them, especially not without Thorin and his nephews. Thorin may have been irritatingly proud, and Fíli and Kíli may have been stupid and reckless at times, but they were his family now. Bilbo put his hand on Thorin's shoulder and asked him to be patient. Thorin huffed but promised to at least try. Bilbo smiled at him and couldn't possibly know how Thorin's heart leapt at that very moment…

"Here we are", said Haldir. "Welcome to Lady Galadriel's –"

"Gandalf!" exclaimed Fíli. Thorin looked up and true, Gandalf was there in his old grey robes, leaning to his staff. The tall and beautiful Elf standing next to him was undoubtedly Lady Galadriel, and she was smiling kindly. She said something in Elvish to Haldir, who bowed to his lady and took his leave.

"Gandalf, where on earth have you been?" asked Thorin after bowing to Galadriel curtly (surprisingly neither of them took to glaring at the other as if saying "you are dead if you try something").

"I had things to take care of", answered Gandalf. "I shall explain it with more precision later. Right now there are more important things to deal with."

"What do you mean?" Thorin raised his brows. Gandalf opened his mouth to answer but two enthusiastic squeals did it for him.

"Fíli!"

"Thalia! Nymeria!"

Kíli and Arya ran to the hall. Arya hugged first Nymeria and then Thalia very tightly. There had never been a smile so wide on Thalia's face. "Oh, Arya, thank gods you're alright", said the hunter with most relieved sigh. Meanwhile Fíli and Kíli were hugging each other so tightly that it seemed like they wouldn't let go of each other ever again. Bilbo and Thorin couldn't stop smiling whilst observing the happy greetings. Thorin looked happier than he had for a very long time and soon he went to embrace both his nephews.

"Kíli, you stupid lad, you could have been killed", he scolded. "Don't you ever make me worry like that again or I will make sure you're grounded until the day you go grey."

"Where did you get that scar?" asked Fíli and touched the long scar on Kíli's face softly, as if fearing it might hurt.

"One of the Orcs slashed it", answered Kíli. "It would've been worse for me if it wasn't for Arya. She killed that filth."

Thalia let go of Arya, at whom everyone was looking half astonished and half admiring. Gandalf and Galadriel chuckled at each other. It wasn't every day people heard a girl of ten had killed an Orc twice of her width and height. Arya flushed of the attention she suddenly received.

"Well, I didn't have much choice, did I?" she said, looking at the tips of her boots. "That pile of crap threatened Kíli and even called him Elvish. Uh, no offence there, my lady."

Galadriel only smiled gently. "None taken, dearest Arya. You meant no harm so I am not offended even a little."

Arya bowed to the Lady of Light politely.

"And you just snapped?" Fíli finished the tale for Arya. She nodded, so Fíli grabbed her hand and pulled her into the embrace Kíli was in. "Thank you. There are no words in any of the tongues to express my gratitude."

"How did you kill that Orc?" asked Thalia with interest.

"She threw a knife right into the back of his neck", Kili answered enthusiastically for Arya. "There's a spot in the back of neck a good throw situated to can kill instantly. Arya hit exactly that spot. Not an easy task to do if you're that small and the throw is coming from five metre's distance."

"Our Arya is quite a talent", said Fíli and ruffled Arya's hair like a proud older brother.

"Where are Jon and Robb, by the way?" asked Arya.

"Robb is being treated by Lord Celeborn", said Bilbo. "His wound became inflamed. Jon is with him right now. I'm sure you'll see them soon."

Then Galadriel spoke. She told the Company they were most welcome and asked them to take their time to rest, wash up and eat. Bilbo and Thorin both became very interested when she mentioned bathing and hot springs. When you hadn't bathed for over a moon even the thought of it was heavenly. Thus Gandalf decided to take the Company to the hot springs. On the way they bumped into Jon who gave Arya a hug and said Robb was getting better and was sleeping at the moment. Arya sighed for relief and asked if Jon was interested in bathing. Jon was absolutely thrilled of the idea and joined them.

There were several vats of water and a few stools in front of the springs, so the area most likely served as a shower room. Gandalf took his leave because he had to discuss about something with Lord Celeborn and also check how Robb was. The Company was standing silently for a while until Thalia said what everyone was thinking.

"So, are we supposed to bathe all together?"

"Apparently", said Thorin without so much as batting an eye.

"Damn it", muttered Thalia. "Oh well, if I have to find a silver lining in this situation, at least I can now decide which one of you has the cutest butt."

"Excuse what?!"

"It was a joke, _a joke_!"

According to the faces the males of the Company were making it wasn't a good joke. Thorin gave Thalia another slap on the shoulder because he couldn't reach higher without making it look awkward (Thalia was very smug of this fact – had she been shorter Thorin would've most likely slapped her to the back of her head). In the end they came to the solution that the girls would bathe in one spring and Thorin, Bilbo, Fíli, Kíli and Jon in another. They would wash in two turns. (This was only because Thalia refused to show off her naked body.) Arya and Kíli sure had washed last night but there was nothing stopping them from doing it again.

"Oh yes, this is very nice", sighed Bilbo after getting into the spring. "These Elves must have the time of their lives here."

"There are several hot springs in Erebor, too", grumbled Thorin. "Although none of them is big enough for those two Dwarflings to swim in", he added after seeing how Fíli and Kíli were actually swimming in the spring.

"Oi! We're no Dwarflings anymore!" exclaimed Kíli a tad offended.

"You could've fooled me", answered Thorin with a hint of sarcasm in his voice. "Now do remind your old uncle: did we already have your coming-of-age feasts or did we have to postpone them because of your immature behaviour?"

"That was a cheap shot, I hope you know that", said Fíli.

Bilbo and Jon had to bite their tongues so that they wouldn't have laughed at this bickering and embarrassed Fíli and Kíli even more. They could hear some exited squeals from the spring where the girls were. It sounded a lot like Thalia and Arya had started a water fight. Jon went to fetch three buckets and grinned at Fíli and Kíli who instantly knew what he was up to. They sneaked to the girls after filling the buckets with cold water and then turned them down. Thalia screeched like a raven with pitch problems and Arya started to chase the lads in her rage. Bilbo couldn't help a laugh when Arya caught Fíli and gave him a taste of his own medicine.

"Show him, Arya!" Thalia cheered.

"Yeah, show him!" shouted Kíli from behind one vat. And Arya did as she was told. Thorin shook his head at the children.

"Wonderful, it's like Dís had had another child after Kíli", he said while watching Arya and Fíli fool around. "Oh well, let them play now that there is no risk of an attack."

* * *

Robb was awake when the rest of the Company came to see him. Both of his wounds were getting better all the time and apparently Celeborn had said that the inflammation had only been back luck. According to him the wounds had been cleaned and treated extremely well. Thalia looked so very proud upon hearing this.

"But I can only try moving tomorrow at earliest", Robb told them. "Lord Celeborn doesn't want me to take unnecessary risks with this leg. What about you, Arya? Are you well?"

"Yes, of course", answered Arya. "I've got a few cuts and bruises here and there but nothing more serious. It takes more than a horde of Orcs to take me down."

"Good", sighed Robb. "I have never been so worried in all my life. Thank goodness you're well, and Kíli too." Robb nodded to the dark-haired Dwarf. "Thank you for taking care of Arya."

Kíli merely shrugged. "Actually it's the other way around since Arya saved my life."

"I stand corrected. Thank you either way."

Jon remained with Robb when the night fell and it was time to go to bed. Arya didn't mind even though due the lack of space she couldn't stay with her brothers – she had already grown used to sleeping next to either Fíli or Kíli. Thalia on the other hand took some time for thinking whether to sleep with the others or taking this chance to sleep alone for a while (Galadriel offered her this choice if she saw it best for her). She chose to sleep with the others. Besides, she had something to tell Fíli and Kíli. There was a perfect moment for it when Thorin and Bilbo were in the hallway, discussing with Gandalf.

"Guess what, you two?" whispered Thalia when the Dwarven brothers had gone to bed and were waiting for Arya to join them.

"What?" asked Kíli.

"Last night Bilbo kissed Thorin on his forehead! I meant to tell you earlier", Thalia added to Fíli with an apologetic smile, "but there was so much other stuff today."

"That's alright", said Fíli. "I just feel bummed for not seeing it. How did Thorin react?"

"He flushed so bright red that I could've easily mistaken him for a very majestic tomato."

Kíli had a hard time to hold back a laugh. But this was a good sign. Things were finally starting to progress properly. The three of them didn't have to time to celebrate it, though, because Arya came to bed and Thorin and Bilbo returned from the hallway. Thorin told them Gandalf had had businesses with Elrond, which told them the reason the wizard had disappeared around Rivendell. Thorin wasn't too pleased with the matter.

"Blasted wizard", he grunted. "Why do they have to be such volatile folk?"

"It could be worse, you know", said Bilbo with a calming tone. "We could just as well have Radagast in our Company instead of Gandalf."

"That's a good point, Uncle Bilbo", said Kíli with the usual mischievous grin on his face.

"Shouldn't you be sleeping already?" sighed Thorin. "And Thalia, why aren't you sleeping in bed now that you finally can?"

Thalia had settled herself on the floor next to the bed of Fíli, Kíli and Arya and wrapped into her bedroll. ""It's too soft", she explained simply. "I can't sleep in too soft beds."

Thorin accepted the explanation. You see, he suffered from the same problem. Too soft beds felt strange and he couldn't possibly sleep in one. Well, he had grown used to sleeping almost everywhere during his years in exile. Those years had hardened him a lot. Thalia, as a Hunter, had most likely also hardened while wandering around. At least she hadn't complained even once during this journey even though more often than not it was the ground that served as a bed.

"Now see here, you three", Thorin sighed again after eyeing his sister's-sons and Arya who just wouldn't sleep. "You must get some sleep. We leave right when Robb has recovered and it's the best for all of us to have rested well before that."

"But we're not sleepy", complained Kíli and Fíli and Arya were nodding next to him.

"And then you even dare to ask me to treat you like an adult", snorted Thorin. "This isn't looking good regarding that matter, Kíli."

Thalia and Bilbo laughed. Kíli gave the Hunter a mortified look and she said, "On this matter I actually agree with His Majestic Grumpiness." Kíli sulked.

"I don't feel sleepy either", said Arya.

"Me neither", added Fíli and gave his uncle an apologetic look. Thorin glanced Thalia quickly as if expecting her to say so too. For his surprise Thalia tossed a bit in her sleeping bag and said she'd fall asleep when it would finally be quiet. Nymeria barked silently and walked to sleep next to Thalia because there was no room in the bed. Bilbo in turn was sitting on his bed and yawned. Thorin tried to figure out a way to make Fíli, Kíli and Arya fall asleep (a way that did not include knocking them off with a club). Finally he thought of a way that had worked almost always when Fíli and Kíli had been children and which hopefully would also work on Arya. Thorin sat on the edge of their bed and started to sing.

_"__Far over the Misty Mountains cold  
To dungeons deep and caverns old  
We must away ere break of day,  
To find our long-forgotten gold_

_The pines were roaring on the height_  
_The winds were mourning in the night_  
_The fire was red, it flaming spread_  
_The trees like torches blazed with light_

_The bells were ringing in the dale  
And men looked up with faces pale  
The dragon's ire more fierce than fire  
Laid low towers and houses frail"_

It actually worked. Kíli had fallen asleep with his arm over Fíli's face as per usual and Arya had curled up into a ball in Fíli's armpit. All three of them looked so peaceful when sleeping. So did also Thalia who had fallen asleep during first two verses. Thorin smiled and walked to Bilbo. Bilbo couldn't help but smile either.

"That's a neat trick", he said.

"Thankfully the lads aren't too old to hear lullabies", stated Thorin. "Although that wasn't one, not really. But it worked anyway and that's the point. They truly are still just children. Sometimes I wonder if it was wise to let them come at all."

"They may be just children, all six of them, but they have more courage than most adults", said Bilbo. He was silent for a moment and then added, "Do you want to hear what Thalia came to tell me while you were busy telling Gandalf off?"

"What was it?"

"She told me that even though she has only known us for this journey, this Company has become like a family to her."

Thorin seemed surprised. "Indeed? I must say, Thalia truly is full of surprises."

Then Bilbo bid him good night and went to bed. Sleeping in a good bed was very welcome indeed. The sheets felt like pure silk and there were no complaints on the pillow, so Bilbo would've fallen asleep quickly if Thorin hadn't asked, "Bilbo… why did you agree to join us? You wouldn't have had to."

Bilbo let out a small sigh and turned to face Thorin. "Friends help friends. I help you to find that map as a thank you for you to come and rescue me from dying out of boredom and constant nagging. You should've heard how Lobelia Sackville-Baggins nagged at me when I returned from Erebor. Awful woman, and I had to endure that torment for, what, ten months. I considered many times returning to Erebor but for some reason I never managed to make myself go."

"We had to give you a nudge out of the door again", opined Thorin. "If we survive this mess, you must promise to visit Erebor sometime. You are missed."

Bilbo smiled and promised to do so. Then he turned around and fell asleep. Thorin got up, put out the candles lighting the room and walked to his own bed. It was too soft, far too soft for his taste. In addition he was rather bothered by Bilbo – or rather by the feelings he harboured for the Hobbit. Bilbo was an important friend of his (and also a valuable ally) and until the day he had left Erebor after the Battle of Five Armies Thorin had thought his feelings for him where similar to those he had for Dwalin and Balin, for example. That is, until Bilbo truly had left Erebor. Thorin remembered how it had taken him months to get used to Bilbo not being there. Sometimes he had even thought he had been talking to him until had remembered he was not there. During those months he had managed to make everyone around him worried, from Dís to Óin and Glóin, let alone young Gimli. And all for one Hobbit.

Then the Orcs had managed to steal the map of Moria (it still remained a great puzzle for everyone how they had managed to do it). Óin had read the portents and told about the restrictions there were for the Company to retrieve it. Thorin had been secretly pleased to meet Bilbo again. His battle wounds had healed much better than expected (there were nothing more than a couple of scars here and there any longer), so nothing could've stopped him from going. In turn, Fíli and Kíli had almost forced him to let them go with him. They had even threatened never to talk to Thorin again if he wouldn't let them go on behalf of house Durin. They also had recovered well from the Battle of Five Armies against all odds, as bad as their wounds had been. Dís had been on the verge of a breakdown for weeks because of her sons (and threatened to kill Thorin with her own bare hands once he was back in shape – Thorin had taken the threat very seriously because he knew Dís could handle knives scarily well), so it was quite understandable she was reluctant to let them go. Unfortunately for everyone Fíli and Kíli were the most stubborn members ever to be born in line of Durin and there was nothing that could've ever stopped them. And they had been so ridiculously exited on their way to Hobbiton. Thorin knew they liked Bilbo, they liked him a lot, but thanks for years of experience he also knew they had some clear hidden agendas. Whatever those might have been, Thorin could not say, but he was sure they had something to do with those long sessions of whispering the lads had had with one certain Thalia Grace.

Thorin let out a sigh while observing his nephews and Arya. Kíli and Arya were holding hands so that they were resting on Fíli's chest. Thorin was not easily moved but now he was very touched to see that – mostly because of the way Fíli and Kíli treated Arya like a sister but also how Arya had attacked an Orc twice her size just to save Kíli. If Thorin had not known better he could have sworn Arya had some Dwarven blood in her. It was such brilliant luck that Arya had sneaked along. Then Thorin looked at Bilbo again. How odd it was that Bilbo, a completely ordinary respectable Hobbit, could make Thorin feel himself so uncomfortable. Oh well, uncomfortable wasn't exactly the right word, but Thorin had never been great with words and did not know how else to describe how he felt. He was by no means inexperienced or anything but no Dwarf or other creature had ever made him feel that way. Bilbo had been quite a nuisance during the previous adventure: complained about the handkerchief he had forgotten (Thorin couldn't but laugh at this memory), got lost more times than he cared to count and then even stolen the Arkenstone. Thorin shook his head. Though there were times when Bilbo was more irritating than Fíli and Kíli combined, he still wanted to be with him, find the map together, laugh in relief when it was over at last, preferably also return to Erebor together and…

Suddenly Thorin understood. He understood everything: the longing for closeness, strange leaps of his heart whenever Bilbo so much as smiled, the need to protect and also the extremely weird burning sensation in his stomach. Thorin internally cursed his own stupidity. The answer could not be more crystal clear than this… or actually more diamond clear because it described the situation far more concretely. How by Durin's beard had he not realised it sooner? The whole thing was so obvious. By _valar_ how he was stupid.

Thorin Oakenshield, the King Under the Mountain, had fallen in love with Bilbo Baggins of Bag End.

* * *

It's a great mystery for me why I wrote that bathing scene there but I just did. And I can tell you all that I think Dean O'Gorman has a very nice tushy xD And personally I'd love to be evaluating the butts of the males of this Company... and now there are Thorin, Fíli, Kíli and Jon standing behind me, ready to skin me alive slowly. xD

And I just wanna say that Thorin and Bilbo are cute.

And by no means, Thorin is not stupid. At least not when it comes to politics or fighting or stuff like that. When it comes to feelings, on the other hand... well, let's just say that he's not the brightest in that matter. And he's awfully shy too. It's so sweet, I love it!

But at least they are progressing now.


	14. Chapter 14

Another filler-ish chapter coming along but I do like this one a lot nevertheless. It was fun to write. The name of the chapter kind of gives away what's gonna happen xD

This chapter was also a lousy excuse for me to write about half-naked Dwarves.

* * *

Chapter fourteen

Where Fíli and Kíli Are the Champions, Arya Will Rock You and Jon Wants It All

**~..~**

The Company stayed in Lórien for almost two weeks (much to annoy Thorin), because even though Robb recovered surprisingly fast, Lord Celeborn would not let him go on until the inflammation had completely passed. And so the Company was stuck, as Thorin expressed it, because they could not go on without Robb. Though honestly it didn't bother anyone else but Thorin who had by the decades developed a deep dislike towards Elves. Fíli and Kíli weren't too thrilled of the Elves either, but either way Fíli was thankful that Lord Celeborn had treated Kíli's wound. And Kíli was very happy with the meals they got in Lórien. It might have been Elvish food but it wasn't all that bad. Plus he had the time of his life when he teased his brother with apples (Fíli still couldn't stand apples at all, not after they had escaped from Thranduil's dungeons with the barrels, and his barrel had been full of the smell of apples, good grief).

Jon was absolutely ecstatic that against all odds he had been able to meet Elves. He didn't leave his brother very often and thus he often discussed about things with Lord Celeborn whenever he came to check on Robb. Celeborn only smiled at Jon's endless flood of questions and was more than happy to provide him answers (except of course on questions about the greatest secrets of Lothlórien, and Jon learnt soon enough the questions he should avoid asking). There hadn't been children in Lothlórien for aeons, so the Company was a true joy for Galadriel and Celeborn. One night Galadriel had a very long conversation with Thalia and she even gifted the Hunter with a book about medical plants found in Lórien and other Middle-Earth. Thalia was completely flabbergasted of the gift. The book was truly needed since by a nonverbal contraction Thalia had been made the healer of the Company and knowing different plants would be very useful indeed. Bilbo knew several medical plants himself but he couldn't possibly remember them all. The book was a translation in Common Tongue so Thalia's only problem were the winding letters. Thankfully Bilbo promised to help her read them.

Still the day when they had to leave Lórien came too soon if you asked anyone but Thorin. They had started to like it there and it truly was a shame to leave. But their duty called. Gandalf, Bilbo and a reluctant Thorin had told Galadriel and Celeborn about their mission and they offered to help the Company the best they could. They weren't extremely fond of Dwarves but even less they wanted to have Orcs as their closest neighbours. Galadriel gave them plenty of food for the rest of the journey (they divided the pile to Bilbo and Thalia's rucksacks) and also Elven cloaks that would help them blend in the nature better. Thorin, however, refused to take one.

"Give it to me", Kíli said to Galadriel. "Best we have it close by in case Uncle changes his mind. He's about as stubborn as a ram, I'm afraid."

Galadriel gave a flowing laugh and gave the cloak to Kíli who put it in his rucksack. For Arya she gave another knife.

"Because it is of Elvish made, it will glow blue when there are Orcs nearby", the Lady explained.

Arya bowed. "Thank you, Lady Galadriel, so very much. I feel so much safer now that I know I will be warned before-handed wherever I am." Then she tied the knife in the opposite side to Needle and the knife Thalia had given her.

"The best of luck for you, Arya Stark", uttered Celeborn. "And also for the Company."

Arya bowed again and thanked Celeborn.

Robb and Jon were gifted two handsome shields. It was a great delight for both because they had inadvertently only taken their swords and nothing else. The shields would be of great use. They were bright silvery and in the middle there was a golden tree to symbolise Lórien. Robb and Jon could hardly wait a chance to use them against Orcs.

Then it was time for the Company to leave. Haldir took them as far as Drimrill River and told them to follow it upriver until they'd arrive to Azanulbizar. He bowed to them politely, wished them the best of luck (and asked them to slay as many Orcs as possible) and then disappeared among the trees. From now on the Company was on its own, but whole for the first time since the Trollshaws. Gandalf's presence brought them a certain sense of safety, and since it still was a long way to Moria no one really had the energy to worry. Thalia, Fíli and Kíli carried on with their whispering and nobody even bothered to find it strange any longer. Arya concentrated on spending more time with her brothers because she had a bad conscience for spending more time with Fíli and Kíli than Robb and Jon. All for naught, said Robb. He simply was satisfied that not all of his time was wasted on looking after his baby sister. Jon muttered something about Robb having a need to prove that he was just as good a warrior as Ned Stark. Arya, for her part, made faces and rude gestures behind Robb's back whenever he didn't look and made Jon, Fíli, Kíli and Thalia almost choke to. Jon enjoyed spending some time with Arya again and he even carried her piggyback for short distances, just like when she had been younger and smaller. The distances, though, were not long because Arya had grown rather heavy. Jon admittedly got some punches whenever he said so out loud.

"How long is it from here to Moria?" asked Bilbo and improved the position of his rucksack.

"Two days, maybe", answered Thorin after a moment's thought. "Before we get there we need to think how we will get you and Arya in unnoticed."

"How about an explosion?" suggested Thalia from the bottom of the queue. "If anything will ever get Orcs out of their caves, an explosion will. And now that we have these cloaks they won't notice us that quickly. In other words, those of us who remain outside can ambush the Orcs."

"That's quite alright but what are we going to explode?" inquired Jon. The whole Company save from Gandalf started to ponder that. Gandalf gave Thorin a meaningful glance. Thorin seemed to understand what the wizard was suggesting because he looked quite agonised when answering.

"The gates. We will explode the gates. Thalia, I'm giving you the full responsibility of the operation."

Thalia nodded and saluted. "It's settled then, Your Majestic Grumpiness."

Thorin ignored the last three words. He had already grown used to how Thalia talked to her and how she lacked politeness. It actually felt quite nice, though there was no way he was ever going to admit it, not even if tortured to get it out. In a year's time Thorin still had not grown used to being addressed overly politely. The old Company and Dís were the extremely welcome exception to the rule (though Dís didn't really count because she had spoken to Thorin extremely impolitely all her life, even more impolitely than Thalia could ever address him).

The journey continued still for several hours. Thalia arranged all of her explosives in her mind and thought of what she could need and for what purpose. Best if she used her whole arsenal and set up a minefield around the gates. "Mines, some dynamite, gunpowder… oh yes, I'd like to see how Orcs get past those…"

"Well well, Thalia has finally found a purpose for her life", chortled Jon while watching the muttering Hunter.

"As long as the work is good", sighed Thorin. "That will do. I wouldn't wish to let her explode the gates of Moria but there isn't much choice, it seems."

"Well, it's that one time it hurts and then it's done", said Bilbo. "And you can always rebuild the gates if needed, can't you?"

"That's true. I suppose it's best we just concentrate on figuring out how to get you and Arya in and out alive."

"No worries, I have a plan."

Gandalf raised his brow suspiciously but did not say anything, although he had his own suspicions concerning Bilbo's plan. Thorin, for his part, made an approving grunt. There was no more talk of that business that day, especially since it started to rain and it was completely forgotten. Thalia and Jon put up the tent under a tree as quickly as they could but by then everyone was positively soaked to bone. Only Gandalf was able to put up a fire and even he wouldn't have succeeded if it wasn't for magic. Arya was shivering and sneezed. Sure, all they needed now was her or someone else to get sick. Wonderful. Soon Gandalf was the only one who was still wearing all his clothes. Everyone else had taken off their wet clothes and searched through their rucksacks to find anything to cover what they didn't wish the others to see. Arya hadn't taken much spare clothes with her but Thalia had so many that she was able to share, though they were a bit too large for Arya. Arya absolutely fell in love with a soft brown cloth Thalia called a hoodie. It was absolutely lovely to wear for it was soft and warm.

"So, what are we gonna do now?" asked Thalia while sitting as close to the fire as possible and rubbed her ice-cold toes. "Gosh I'm cold just because of little rain."

"Tell me about it", said Fíli and squeezed water out of his hair. It was a bad idea because the cold water started to run down his bare chest and it felt very uncomfortable. "We must hope nobody catches a cold. It would be so embarrassing, especially now that we're so close to our destination."

That was true. They were now very close to Moria. Thorin said that the estimated distance was seventy miles, most likely less than that. Robb had dug a rope out of his rucksack and fixed it to the both ends of the tent to serve as a washing line. Grey Wind, Ghost and Nymeria had nestled against each other, because even though they managed well in cold weather, rain wasn't good at all for them. Their fur was somewhat water-resistant but a deluge like there was outside was very bad for them.

"I do hope it won't rain for long", said Bilbo while preparing them a nice cup of hot tea.

"I agree", Arya sighed and squeezed Thalia's hoodie more tightly around her. "What should we do now? We need to kill some time here."

In the end it happened so that Thalia was forced to teach the rest of the Company "traditional songs of her people". How traditional they were, that could easily be disputed, because after a couple of hours Fíli and Kíli knew the chorus of "We Are the Champions" by heart (which they were singing badly until Thorin told them to shut up). Arya, for her part, liked a lot the rhythm of "We Will Rock You" and Jon wanted to hear "I Want It All" again and again. In the end Thalia swore in her mind that she would not listen to Queen for a couple of months, as ingenious as the band was. But it was cheering to see their music had a good reception also in Middle-Earth. Oh well, rather their lyrics, because Thalia could not play the music. She had left her iPod in the States because she had borrowed it to her friend Annabeth, and on the other hand it wouldn't have been any good without speakers that she did not have at all.

"The music of your home country is weird", commented Robb.

"Actually it's English, not American", Thalia corrected. "Same language but two totally different countries. But that doesn't really matter now, would take me ages to explain the whole thing. Anyway, the lead singer of Queen, Freddie Mercury, was an absolute genius. I'd sing you 'Bohemian Rhapsody' if my voice wouldn't do it injustice. Plus these songs sound so much better with music but I can't really play it to you now."

After Queen Thalia carried on with something she called music from movies. Nobody understood what it meant but Thalia didn't explain it to them either. Thorin wasn't too thrilled with the performance because for the rest of the night a song Thalia said was from _Snow White and the Seven Dwarves_ called "Heigh Ho" was stuck in his head. Fíli and Kíli made the whole situation worse by continuing singing it when Thalia was done and they even swore they'd teach it to all their friends when they returned to Erebor.

"Goodbye peace", Thorin sighed. "Now that blasted song will be stuck in my head for the rest of my life."

"That's the point", Thalia chortled and barely ducked when Thorin threw his wet shirt at her.

It just kept raining for several hours until it finally stopped when sun was setting and then it was too late to carry on. The clothes were also still quite damp, which meant that the Company save from Gandalf remained half-naked for a good time. Thus they decided to eat some evening snack and go to sleep. Fíli, Kíli, and Thalia continued plotting whilst Arya made sure they weren't disturbed. Jon and Robb looked at each other but neither of them had any idea whatsoever what was going on. They both were tired enough to just let it go and snuck inside their bedrolls. Gandalf, Bilbo and Thorin smoked one more pipe before doing the same. Thorin and Bilbo's glances met and they looked at each other for a good while but didn't do anything. Fíli buried his face behind his hands and Thalia let out an impatient huff. Arya smirked a little and nestled against Kíli before falling asleep.

"Fíli, Kíli, your uncle is so stupid that I'm about to start crying soon", said Thalia.

"Get in the line", sighed Fíli. "And Bilbo isn't much smarter, just saying."

"No sir", admitted Thalia and huffed a bit more. "It's time we start to play it unfair. If nothing happens for the next couple of days I say we carry out the plan B of all plan B's. This is starting to bug me a lot. We've tried everything: insinuating comments, had them sleep next to each other _thousands of times_, and in Lórien we went as far as locking them inside some sort of a broom cupboard, but _no_!"

"Let's do that, I'm starting to get bugged too", said Kíli. "How did the plan B of all plan B's go again, we push them so that they'll kiss?"

"Oh right, you don't know", remembered Fíli. "We changed it with Thalia when you were… well, you know. Nowadays it goes like this: Thalia holds Bilbo, I hold Thorin, and then we make them kiss. We also call this whole thing Operation Bagginshield now. Thalia will explain."

Kíli thought of it for a moment while Thalia explained what Operation Bagginshield meant and then started to smile mischievously. "I like that, both plan and the operation name. Name's good and terse, and plan's simple and easy to carry out. And now I thought of something else we could carry out here, tonight."

Fíli and Thalia were all ears when Kíli told them how they could push Bilbo sleeping quite close to Thorin closer still. Carrying it out was left for Fíli and Thalia, though, because Kíli couldn't really move without waking Arya next to him. Thalia muttered something like "at least someone is sleeping close to someone". Then she and Fíli started to work. Pushing Bilbo next to Thorin wasn't the easiest task ever because it had to be done without waking either of them and then at some point the whole situation was about to make Fíli laugh. Thalia almost cursed out loud because the laughter was starting to get her too. Kíli made a huff and muttered not only insolences but also something rude about an incapable older brother and how he should've been born first. It got some sense back to Fíli so that he could finish the operation. Bilbo did not wake up at any point and after ending up next to Thorin he just curled up against his side tightly. Fíli, Kíli, and Thalia shared a satisfied look. If they had any luck things would start to progress from here. The three of them got into their bedrolls after agreeing how they would go on after reaching Moria. Fíli and Kíli promised to help Thalia set up the explosives. Thalia was very joyful to hear it because she had a lot of bombs. Then they settled to sleep however they liked. Kíli stuck his other arm on Fíli's face again and quite surprisingly Thalia curled up to sleep against Fíli's other side. Fíli did not mind either one. He was so used to Kíli and during the past few weeks Thalia had become like a sister to him.

Some time at night Bilbo woke up because it was hot. The reason for it was quickly unveiled when he looked around a bit. It was dim in the tent but the hairy strong arms around him were unmistakable. Though Bilbo couldn't really understand how he and Thorin had ended up sleeping so close to each other, since they had fallen asleep so that they were at least one and a half feet apart. One of them or both had probably rolled over in their sleep. Bilbo was not sure of it (he did have some slight suspicions concerning two young Dwarven princes and one half-blood girl), but it didn't matter, not really. It was nice, sleeping next to Thorin. Bilbo smiled to himself and huddled tighter against Thorin despite the fact that it was hot there. He didn't get chances like this that often and Bilbo did make out the best of them whenever he got them. It sure was extremely stupid, about the stupidest thing in the world, to have fallen in love with a Dwarven king who surely did not return his feelings but what could a simple Hobbit do about them?

Bilbo had realised he had feelings for Thorin after the Battle of Five Armies when Thorin had been gravely injured, but had understood they had been there for much longer, maybe ever since from that day on Carrock. Many nights Bilbo had spent by Thorin's side and he had had equally many chances to tell him how he felt but he simply could not bring himself to do it. In many senses Bilbo was stronger than he looked but he knew he couldn't take it if Thorin turned him down, even if it happened in a very gentle manner. It had been horrible enough to be cast out of Erebor because of the blasted Arkenstone; Bilbo did not want to experience that feeling ever again. He had been unspeakably happy when Thorin had asked to see him, had apologised to him what he had said (because during the battle he had seen some sense in Bilbo's actions) and asked if they could be friends again. There had been tears, though neither of them would ever admit it. Thorin had most likely never cried like that before. Bilbo had left his side only to relieve himself and occasionally to check on Fíli and Kíli. The brothers had recovered from their injuries far more quickly than Thorin and had been able to stand on their feet without assistance the day Bilbo had left for Shire with Gandalf. Thorin had needed Dwalin and Glóin to support him. Bilbo let out a soft sigh when remembering how sad Thorin had looked that day.

Soon Bilbo fell asleep again, unaware that Gandalf was still up. The wizard smiled to himself when Bilbo curled up against Thorin's side again. Finally something was happening. Gandalf had been most disappointed when the Company had finally arrived to Lothlórien and there had been no change whatsoever in Thorin and Bilbo's relationship. For some time Gandalf had played with the thought that the two of them were only acting and a whole lot of things had happened, but they sure weren't that good liars. And so Gandalf was back to square one, which is to say that both the King Under the Mountain and Master Baggins were so stupid that no one could really comprehend it. Fíli, Kíli, and Thalia naturally carried on with their plans (of which Gandalf knew everything) but they did not seem to be helping. Fíli and Kíli had been shooting insinuating comments like there had been no tomorrow, and the three of them had also locked Thorin and Bilbo in a cabin where the Elves kept their brooms and mops (Haldir passing the cabin had rescued them when they had been inside for two hours) when they had been in Caras Galadhon, Gandalf gave them that, but he wanted something to happen already. He did not wish his friends to spend their days alone, especially because it was obvious they loved each other so very deeply.

* * *

Enter Fíli, Kíli and Thalia, the ultimate Bagginshield shippers... and Gandalf, the captain of the ship. My headcanons are getting pretty weird but whatever. Weird is good and it's more fun to write with weird headcanons.

The last few paragraphs were a pain to write because I almost screamed at my own text like this, "Bilbo! Don't get depressed! Thorin loves you!" As if it would help at all. Frankly I'm getting back all the feelings of frustration I had when I first wrote this in Finnish. Those two are so stupid! (Fíli just told me to get in the line as well.)


	15. Chapter 15

This chapter is the longest thing about battle I've ever written in one chapter. I had to watch Two Towers and Return of the King at the time to get the right feeling (+ from YouTube the part from The Hobbit where Balin talks about the battle of Azanulbizar). The two songs that helped me write: Forth Eorlingas, Roast Mutton. Please listen to them while reading.

* * *

Chapter fifteen

Where Shit Gets Real

**~..~**

It was easy to follow Drimrill River. It didn't make any weird curves unlike so many other rivers in Middle-Earth, on contrary, it led straight to the Misty Mountains. None in the Company was especially happy to see the mountains again. They did not have good memories of them, Arya least of all. Because they were so close to their destination they had fewer breaks. Whenever they had them Robb and Jon had taken up Fíli and Kíli's old job as Arya's teachers. Soon it became clear, though, that their sister did not need much teaching any more. She had learnt to improvise well and in about five training matches out of ten she beat her brothers.

The Company reached Durin's stone midday one day after they had left Lothlórien. Thorin, Fíli, and Kíli briefly went to see it and prayed for Mahal to bless their attempt to reclaim the map of Moria. Then they carried on. The closer they came to Azanulbizar the more nervous Thorin became. Last time he (and his grandfather) had had a great army. Now they were only nine (plus three direwolves) and six of them were still more or less children. Thorin did trust both his nephews and Thalia, and the Stark siblings with all his heart but even the thought of losing them in the up-coming battle felt like a terrible nightmare. Thorin knew way too much about loss. He had seen both his grandfather and his brother being killed in battle, and on the top of that he was responsible for Fíli and Kíli almost losing their lives in Battle of Five Armies. Actually now that he gave the whole thing more thought he truly wondered how Dís had not decided to murder him before. And then there was Bilbo…

Thorin sighed deeply. Here they were again, on a lunatic mission because of his stupid pride. It just was too late to turn back and let it be. But next time if the Orcs managed to steal something from Erebor, whatever crap it was, just let them keep it. (Though he still was not sure how in _valar_'s name they had managed to steal the map in the first place.) Thorin internally cursed his inability to learn from his past mistakes. This would be the last time he'd ever endanger the safety of his family, or what was left of it, let alone his friends…

The sun was preparing to set when they finally reached their destination. The place was desolated and nothing grew there, except maybe stones – if even them. The Misty Mountains rose about fifty metres from them and in the wall there were huge closed gates.

"Azanulbizar", said Thorin plainly. "Thalia, start working."

Thalia saluted, dragged Fíli and Kíli with her and they started to install the explosives. The rest of the Company remained where they were, thinking about their attack positions and how they could ever get Bilbo and Arya inside without anyone noticing them. Robb suggested they'd work in pairs because it was more efficient. In addition it was easier too, since you didn't have to watch your back all the time because someone else took care of that. They accepted the suggestion and dividing the pairs happened quickly, though Thorin was not especially thrilled to be paired with Thalia (Robb and Jon naturally were comrades-in-arms, as were Fíli and Kíli, and Gandalf was allowed to go solo as much as he desired). During the past couple of weeks Thorin had grown to like Thalia but he wasn't sure how they were going to get along in a battle. Thalia had a very strong will, one that could compare even to that of Dwarves.

"Hey, wait a sec", said Arya out of the blue.

"What is it?" asked Robb. "Aren't you happy with the plan?"

"It's not that. Can't you hear?"

"Hear what?" Jon raised his brow.

"The mountains", said Arya. "They sing. I just noticed it. Can't you hear it?"

Thorin and Gandalf shared a sceptical look and Robb said, "Arya, the mountains don't sing. They can't, they're lifeless stone."

"Are you suggesting that I lie?" Arya began to lose her temper. "_They sing_. I can hear it clearly! Honestly! I can't figure out the lyrics but it's something wistful. _I can hear them singing_!"

"Arya, no one suggested you're lying", said Thorin wearily. "But I do suggest you don't concentrate on whether or not the mountains sing right now. We have a mission to accomplish."

For a moment Arya looked like she could've burst into tears but she regained the grip of herself and nodded. Getting the map back was at that moment her priority number one. She couldn't allow her thoughts to wander about. She had to concentrate. A bit abruptly Thorin leaned down and whispered to her ear, "Don't worry. I believe you because I can hear it too."

Aryan almost couldn't hide her astonishment but fortunately no one noticed it because Thalia, Fíli and Kíli had returned and they could not have looked more satisfied with themselves.

"Right, all done", Thalia announced. "All the bombs are at their positions, so are we gonna start make things to boom?"

"Yes", answered Thorin and explained the plan to them. The Company dispersed to their positions. Fíli and Kíli told Bilbo and Arya a safe route to the gates in case all mines did not explode. The meaning was that Bilbo and Arya went in while the explosions provided them some cover.

Gandalf came to Thorin and Thalia, who were kneeling behind a giant erratic boulder, to wish them luck before returning to his original post with Robb and Jon. Then Thorin nodded to Thalia, and she pressed the launch button ("Fire in the hole!" she shouted). The plan was a success. The explosives worked just as they should've and from inside the mountain a whole bunch of Orcs came to see what was happening. They, in turn, had to face their maker as they stepped into the landmines Fíli and Kíli had installed. (Thalia could not be more proud of her friends – and neither could Thorin.) Bilbo and Arya had apparently managed to sneak in because in ten minutes they were nowhere in sight and all the mines had blown up. There were still Orcs flooding from the gates and the Company was forced to start an open fight.

"Thalia, cover my back", ordered Thorin.

"I'm on it", grinned Thalia. "Let's beat the shit out of them."

And so they began the attack. Fíli and Kíli joined the battle a couple of seconds after them, and Gandalf, Jon and Robb soon after that. The direwolves were of help too, because in addition to attacking Orcs they also protected the members of the Company when needed (although Arya had specifically ordered that Nymeria would keep Thalia safe).

Meanwhile Arya and Bilbo were walking as quickly as they could. They had been able to enter Moria without problems but now they were facing another subject of worry. They had absolutely no idea where that map could have been, and because neither of them had ever been to Moria before, they didn't know at all how to navigate there. In addition to that Bilbo was worried how they were going to get out because in this relatively short trip they had several times almost bumped into Orcs.

"I'm scared", murmured Arya.

"Well you're not the only one", answered Bilbo. "And for this folly I left my comfortable Hobbit hole in Bag End. I must be out of my right mind."

"I, in turn, am starting to understand why Robb didn't want me to come."

"Orc!" hissed Bilbo and pushed Arya against the stone wall. The Elven cloaks Lady Galadriel had given them hid them perfectly and the Orc ran past them without noticing them. He bumped right into another Orc who landed on his bottom and cursed with a low rough voice.

"Be more careful, stupid maggot!"

"They sent me to check on the map!" croaked the Orc who had bumped into him. "There's the Dwarf who killed Azog! The one who managed to reclaim the Lonely Mountain!"

"Fine, go then", huffed the other Orc and left the place. Bilbo and Arya glanced at each other and started to follow the Orc who was concerned of the map. Unbelievable that they should be this lucky. They followed the Orc as briskly as possible. It was dim in Moria and there were loose rocks everywhere to make walking more difficult. Fortunately the Orc was walking straight and never ventured off the path. Bilbo and Arya only had to stay behind him and unnoticed. For Bilbo it wasn't a trick or anything (Hobbits were good in staying hidden), and Arya didn't seem to have troubles either. She had often enough sneaked to Winterfell's pantry to steal some tasty treats for herself, Nymeria, Jon and Ghost.

The Orc turned and went into a big chamber. There were currently three other Orcs there who were studying something, most likely the map. The Orc told his business to the others while Bilbo and Arya hid behind a throne made of stone to ponder how they should proceed from here. They quickly found a solution. Bilbo would get the map while Arya would throw stones against the armours at the other side of the chamber. There were plenty of small stones suitable for the job so Arya started to work on it. The faces of the Orcs were worth seeing when the armours suddenly started to clatter on their own. They went to see them and that was when Bilbo slipped the ring into his finger and disappeared. Nicking the map was relatively easy, though the table, where it was, was rather tall. Arya carried on throwing stones until she was forced to hide when the Orcs looked directly at the place where she was. Bilbo had sneaked under the table with the map.

"The armours can't just start clattering by themselves", said one of the Orcs and returned to the table. Soon after there was a horrible scream in the chamber. "The map! It was 'ere just a moment ago!"

The Orcs dashed out of the chamber weapons at the ready. Arya pulled the hood off her face and grinned at Bilbo who had returned into sight, equally laughing. He got up and ruffled Arya's hair.

"Well done, you", he praised. "That gave them something to wonder."

"I still can't understand how they could fall for that", giggled Arya. "They must be very stupid indeed. How's the map?"

Bilbo raised a piece of parchment tied into a roll. "Right, let's go back. I don't like this place at all."

They made sure the way was clear, and then hurried back to the direction they had come from. This operation had succeeded far more quickly than either of them had anticipated. Arya could hardly wait to see her brothers' faces.

When they were almost at the exit they bumped into a horde of Orcs. The Orcs couldn't see them but they were badly in their way. Arya and Bilbo hid behind a large boulder to think what they could do. They had to get out, one way or another. Arya was so small that she could've most likely sneak past the Orcs but even they could not be stupid enough not to notice her in the rays of setting sun. Goblins were a whole other case but Orcs had at least some sense in their heads. In the end only one idea that might have worked popped into Bilbo's mind, and there was no guarantee it would work, but they had to take the risk.

"Arya", said Bilbo, "I have an idea. It might not work but we have to try. I'll distract the Orcs while you sneak out with the map. Take this." Bilbo dropped his ring on Arya's palm. "It will make you invisible."

"What about you?" asked Arya.

"I will be right behind you", Bilbo promised. "You're quicker than me and you're a child. I won't let children die in a place like this."

Arya let out a soft breath but agreed eventually. She didn't have a better idea. "You better make sure you don't get yourself killed", she said with the assertiveness of a ten-year-old. "I don't want you to die here either." _Because of Thorin, too…_ she thought but didn't say anything aloud.

Bilbo smiled and told Arya to go. Parting from the Ring felt bad, as if he had lost a piece of himself, but Arya and her safety were more important at the moment. And as soon as Arya had put the Ring on and turned invisible Bilbo knew he had made the right decision. Then he got down the business. He had spotted an old and huge bell near the gates, and it would create a great echo. Bilbo hid under it and started to bang it. The whole Moria was ringing with a horrible sound completely out of tune and many an Orc dashed outside only to meet Thorin and Orcrist, and Thalia and her spear. Some of the Orcs fell back deeper into Moria, and as soon as the way was clear Bilbo ran out as quickly as his legs would take him.

At the same time Jon and Robb were fighting for their lives. The shields Galadriel and Celeborn had given them were extremely helpful, because they seemed to protect them even when they didn't think about their protections. Grey Wind and Ghost were far more ferocious than usually and they had more Orc victims alone than their masters together. Both had wounds and cuts here and there but they were direwolves, and direwolves did not. The four of them played well together. Jon and Robb were carefully protecting each other's backs. They could have been better but they had faced a slight problem.

"Where the hell is Gandalf?" bellowed Robb and chopped another Orc head off.

"I don't know!" answered Jon. "I heard him talking something about auxiliary troops but I don't know better!"

"Brilliant", Robb huffed. "I'm starting to understand why His Majesty thinks he's a complete nutcase. We definitely could use some auxiliary troops. If he has auxiliary troops why haven't we utilised them sooner?"

Robb did not expect his question to be answered, so he almost jumped out of his trousers when a strange voice answered, "Because according to the portents we weren't allowed to help until you got the map back."

Jon quickly ran his sword through an Orc's armour and turned to see what was going on. The speaker was a Dwarf, a tall one at that, and his bald head was full of tattoos. He had knuckle dusters in his hands in addition to two huge war axes and for a warrior he didn't have thick armour, only a breastplate. Gandalf was smiling behind him with a whole Dwarf army. Their numbers must have passed two hundred.

"Dwalin, at your service", said the Dwarf, bowed and then struck down two Orcs at once.

"Robb Stark, likewise", answered Robb in astonishment.

"Jon Snow, likewise."

"Good, now that the introductions are out of the way, let's kill those bastards", said Dwalin and turned to see the army. "_Baruk Khazâd! Khazâd ai-mênu!_"

The Dwarves answered with loud yelling and charged. Only a couple of them stayed behind, mostly to clear up the situation for Robb and Jon. Apparently right after arriving to Lórien Gandalf had sent a message to Erebor that they needed help at the eastern gate of Moria. Dwalin and Balin had gathered their troops and taken off two days after receiving the letter.

"Well, I suppose there's nothing else to say except that your timing was brilliant", Jon praised. "How on earth Gandalf managed to deduce that we needed help right now?"

"I wouldn't think of it too much, laddie", said Balin. "Gandalf cannot exactly foresee the future, but his instincts in cases like this are very good indeed."

"So it would seem", Robb admitted. "We really could use the help."

Then they ran after the army to rejoin the battle.

* * *

Meanwhile Thalia had managed to get in trouble. She was fighting against an exceptionally huge (and hideously ugly) Orc, when she suddenly felt a hard kick in her stomach and something threw her against the rocks. A smaller Orc had come to the bigger one's aid. Nymeria attacked the smaller one and managed to tear his throat open but the larger one kicked her on Thalia. Thalia was sure she this was the worst jam she had ever been in. The Orc came closer to her, sword at the ready and a cruel smile on his ugly face. Thalia tried to push Nymeria off her but the direwolf was heavy and also unconscious on the top of that. Thalia had never been more scared in all her life.

"Say goodbye", cackled the Orc and raised his sword. Thalia closed her eyes and waited for the blow. It never came.

"Lay one finger on her and I will skin you alive!"

Well, that added one more thing to Thalia's list of things she never thought she'd be, because she had never thought she'd be so glad to hear Thorin's voice. Thorin ran Orcrist through the Orc's chest, finished the work by slicing off his head, and then turned to check on Thalia. "Are you still in one piece and breathing?"

"Yeah", answered Thalia with a painful smile on her lips. "I'm a bit hurt all over but I'm more worried about Nymeria, to be sure."

Thorin was forced to kill three Orcs before getting a chance to check how Nymeria was. Luckily she was only unconscious. Thorin pushed her gently off Thalia because there was a chance she had broken bones, and he didn't wish to hurt her more than what was necessary. Fortunately Thalia managed to get on her feet all on her own. Her stomach was hurting but other than that she was fine.

"Thorin – thank you", said Thalia. "You saved my life, no doubt."

"Pray don't mention it", answered Thorin. "Let's just say I owed you it, so to speak. And now we need to stop this, the uglies are coming again."

Thalia's face was graced with a devilish grin. These Orcs did not seem to know who they were messing with. And so Thorin and Thalia attacked the Orcs together, both of their weapons glowing bright blue. Fíli and Kíli came to help them not long after because the Orcs were upon them as one horde and even Thalia's Aegis didn't help them much.

"It's a very nice day for a fight, isn't it?" Kíli joked.

"Shut up and shoot them!" ordered Thorin. The four of them started to get weary and all the time more Orcs were upon them. They needed auxiliary troops, otherwise this would be their last battle. At that moment Thorin would've been thrilled to see even the Elves of Lothlórien.

Without warning they heard a battle cry in the valley. The battle ceased for a moment and everyone turned to see where it had come from. A relieved smile spread on Thorin's face. He'd know that bald head everywhere. How Dwalin had ever known to bring his army to Azanulbizar that day, that Thorin did not know but he didn't really even care. He could also see other familiar faces in the troops. Thorin and the lads could see at least Bifur, Bofur, Dori, Nori, Ori and Glóin. They couldn't see Balin but Thorin was sure he was there somewhere. It would not be like Balin to stay at his home cave when there was a battle going on. But now the whole battle would change remarkably.

"That I did not expect to see", grinned Thalia.

"I've never been so happy to see Dwalin leading the army of Erebor, literally never", said Fíli, and Kíli was nodding next to him.

The Dwarves attacked the Orcs with such fury that it caught Thalia off-guard. All of the sudden half of the Orcs who had some time ago dashed from Moria had fallen. Dwalin and Glóin were the first to fight their way to their king, and Balin arrived soon after them. Fíli, Kíli and Thalia went to help Ori who this time had proper war-gear but who still was somewhat an inexperienced fighter compared to other Dwarves. Robb, Jon and the direwolves joined them not long after. Nymeria, too, had recovered from the blow she had got and didn't seem to be affected by it at all. She truly had grown tough during this adventure.

"It's such a joy to see you", Thorin said to Dwalin and Balin in the midst of the fight.

"Couldn't say better, laddie", Balin answered with a smile. "I was a tad worried about you all but you seem to have done well here. Where is Bilbo?"

"I wish I knew", sighed Thorin. "He hasn't come out yet, at least not that I know of. Actually I am not sure if Arya is out yet either."

Dwalin halted for a split second. "You took a _girl_ in the Company?"

"Two, to be exact. The other is fighting down there with my nephews. Her name is Thalia."

"Now I've seen everything", muttered Dwalin. "Womenfolk in an outright battle, give me strength."

It didn't take ten minutes for the Orcs to realise they had to fall back. They ran more or less everywhere to escape the wrath of Dwarves. Most of them retreated back into the mountains but some of them started to run towards Lórien – a bad mistake indeed because the Elves were ready to greet them with their arrows. Thorin, in turn, was pleased to see the Dwarves hadn't suffered bad losses. They just couldn't see Bilbo or Arya anywhere and it made him very worried. Robb and Jon were running here and there, calling for their sister. Nymeria, for her part, tried to catch Arya's trail but the smell of Orc carcasses overpowered all the other scents.

"Thorin!" shouted Fíli. He seemed extremely shocked. "Come quickly! Bilbo –"

Suddenly Thorin felt like his whole world was coming crumbling down. Surely Bilbo was not … Thorin couldn't even finish the thought.

* * *

Dwalin's battle cry is a traditional Dwarvish battle cry, meaning "Axes of the Dwarves! The Dwarves are upon you!" There's more Khuzdul in future chapters, just because I love it.

Anygay, it seems I like cliffhangers. No good, Erina, no good at all.

Initially I wasn't supposed to include other Dwarves than Thorin, Fíli and Kíli in this story but what could I do, I love Dwalin, Bofur and Ori - and all the others, to be sure.

There isn't much things that I planned when I first started to plan this story, except for two things: Arya gets the Ring, and Thorin saves Thalia's life.


	16. Chapter 16

Spent this night translating my ass off. It was worth it.

Songs that inspired writing this song: Sarah Brightman - I Don't Know How to Love Him, Ailee - Heaven, Berryz Koubou - Otakebi Boy WAO!, Can You Feel the Love Tonight in Finnish.

* * *

Chapter sixteen

Where the Oblivious Idiots Aren't So Oblivious Any Longer

**~..~ **

Fíli led Thorin to a place some twenty yards away where Bilbo was leaning against stunted pine with a spear in his side. Thalia was already working on it with Kíli. Kíli was holding Bilbo by his arms while Thalia first cut the spear shorter and then pulled it out (it wasn't very deep, luckily). Bilbo's cry of pain was by far the worst Thorin had ever heard, and he had heard his fair share of those during his long life.

"Oh goodie, you made it here quickly", said Thalia after glancing quickly and Fíli and Thorin. "Fee, be an angel and get the first-aid kit from by backpack. And Thorin, give me a hand, will ya? I need to get these clothes off Bilbo…"

"The… the wound isn't…" Thorin managed.

"No", assured Thalia. "It's bad, alright, and it needs very precise treatment, but Bilbo's not gonna die from it or anything. Or, well, maybe he could, but there's no way in Tartarus I'm gonna let it happen, mind you."

"And I am not so stupid as to go on this suicide mission without taking precautions, just to note", snapped Bilbo with a tense tone. Thorin raised a confused brow but was answered when helping Thalia to get Bilbo's shirt off. Under his shirt Bilbo was wearing a very familiar _mithril_ chainmail. Thalia was greatly amazed upon noting that thanks to it Bilbo's wound wasn't as bad as she had anticipated. "I did know _mithril_ was a wonder metal, that I give you, but I never thought it would be this strong", she said.

"There aren't many materials as durable as _mithril_", said Kíli with a wide grin.

"How quickly will it heal?" asked Bilbo.

"That's hard to say", answered Thalia. "Might take a couple of days but might also take weeks. We need to keep an eye on it. But now I'll go search for some medical plants with the guys. Thorin, could you please clean the wound in the meantime?"

Thorin agreed to it a bit suspiciously because his instincts told him Thalia had something on her mind. But he really didn't have anything against looking after Bilbo. In its own weird way it was kind of nice, to be honest. Thalia, Fíli and Kíli left to search for plants and left Thorin and Bilbo alone. The three of them shared a satisfied smile. Maybe now finally…

Thorin dampened one of the cotton cloths in the first-aid kit with disinfectant and pressed lightly Bilbo's wound with it. Bilbo grimaced because it was biting a lot. For some time they were in perfect silence until Thorin remembered something.

"Where is Arya?"

"I don't know", answered Bilbo. "She could be anywhere. I borrowed her my ring so I suppose she's still hiding somewhere, invisible."

"No I'm not", said a bright voice from their right. Arya had appeared there with a wide smile on her face. "Arya, at your service", she grinned.

Bilbo let out a relieved sigh. Arya seemed unharmed apart from a couple of scratches and bruises and as per usual also very cheery. Thorin was very relieved as well, more so because he had grown rather fond of her during the past few weeks than anything else.

"It's good to see you're well", he said.

"Here's the map", said Arya and passed the parchment roll to Thorin. "Right, and here's your ring, Bilbo", she added and pressed the item on Bilbo's palm. "I hope I'll never have to use it again. It… it did not feel good at all. It was helpful alright, and I made it out safely, but at the same time all these weird pictures started to flow in my mind, as if they were something I should remember. I doubt they're anything, really, but still…"

"The main thing is that you're fine", Bilbo interrupted her babbling.

"What about you?" asked Arya. "Is that bad?"

"Not as bad as it could be", answered Bilbo. "It could have definitely been worse if it wasn't for my _mithril_ chainmail."

Thorin felt a bit proud for giving Bilbo the said chainmail about a year or so ago. It had served its purpose better than well. Again they were silent for quite a long time until Thalia returned muttering something about "Dwarves who wouldn't recognize medical herbs even if they tripped over them". In her hand she had some polypodies and some leaves of waybread. She passed them over to Thorin after taking the roots off from the polypodies.

"Put them on the wound so that the waybread leaves are under the polypodies", she instructed. "The roots come on the top but you're gonna have to crush 'em first."

"Can I help at something?" asked Arya.

"Sure. Come with me, I need help at collecting plants. Those two are absolutely hopeless when it comes to herbs."

Thalia and Arya left, grinning at each other widely. Arya had a hunch of some sort why Thalia wished her to help with collecting medical herbs. Thorin put the waybread leaves and polypody leaves on Bilbo's side carefully (Bilbo turned a bit so that they wouldn't fall off until the wound was bound) and then started to crush the roots. He wasn't much of a healer, to be honest, but he did have some basic first-aid skills.

"Does it hurt?" asked Thorin.

"Not anymore, no", answered Bilbo. "Mostly it smarts like hell. But I must say that we were very lucky that Balin, Dwalin and the others happened to come here today."

"My dear Bilbo, it was not just a coincidence", said Gandalf who had just arrived, followed by Robb, Jon and Thorin's old Company apart from Óin and Bombur (they had had to remain in Erebor because of their jobs). "It was good sense."

"Gandalf, can you do something for this wound?" Thorin asked after putting the crushed roots on top of the leaves. Bilbo grimaced again because of the bite.

"Of course I could, but I have noticed that time is the best healer, at least for wounds like that one", answered Gandalf. "Besides, you have done excellent work with that one."

Thorin mumbled something insulting about insufferable wizards. Robb and Jon shared a quick glance and then said they were going to look for Arya. Dwalin went with them because he wanted to see for himself what sort of women Arya and Thalia were. He still couldn't imagine womenfolk on battlefield, even though he had been interacting with Dís for years. The rest of the Company split up to do whatever it was that they were doing. Glóin, Bifur and Bofur went to put up a tent in a small wood nearby while Dori and Nori went to look for more survivors. There weren't that many wounded or fallen Dwarves but it was always better to check for certainty. Balin and Ori lingered with Thorin and Bilbo. Ori told Bilbo the latest news from Erebor and Balin said he had sent the army home. Their few dead should be buried with honour. Thorin accepted it and started to bind Bilbo's side. Ori helped him the best he could.

Elsewhere Fíli, Kíli and Thalia were gritting their teeth. It was all going very nicely and smoothly and then Gandalf and the others had to come and ruin the atmosphere (that could have been more romantic, yes, but they had to make do with the little they had). Arya was laughing next to them and praising Nymeria. Thalia had told Arya how brave the direwolf had been and she could not have been more proud. Nymeria stood taller to show what a fine wolf she was.

"We'll do it tonight", said Fíli. "Enough is enough. Thorin and Bilbo just clearly are too darn stupid."

"Roger that", Thalia echoed.

"Oh, what are ye gonna do tonight?" asked Dwalin who had just arrived. Robb and Jon gave Arya a rib-cracking hug and told her she had been brilliant.

"None of your business, Dwalin", snapped Kíli.

"Now see here lads, and – Thalia, I presume."

"At your service", said Thalia and gave the big Dwarf a short bow.

"– Thorin is my best mate and any scheming that involves him is my business", Dwalin continued, "so let's hear it that. What are ye gonna do?"

Fíli, Kíli and Thalia had no other choice but to tell Dwalin the whole story. Arya confirmed everything she knew of the story, and it finally dawned to Jon and Robb why there had been all that whispering and secrecy. After Fíli had finished the tale, Dwalin smirked.

"So that's how it is. In that case Thorin is a bigger twat than I ever imagined."

"Ya think?" blurted Thalia.

Dwalin looked at the young Hunter. "I like this lass. She's got spirit."

"So has Arya", said Kíli. "And she's very quick to learn."

Arya blushed slightly from the praise. Dwalin looked at her and raised an eyebrow. So Thorin had taken a little girl like this to the Company. Dwalin could understand why Thalia was there but he couldn't stop wondering how Arya was still alive and in one piece. Well, maybe there was more to her than met the eye. It wasn't completely unheard of that a woman could handle weapons well. In a very early point Dwalin had learnt never to give Dís anything sharp unless he wanted it to turn against himself.

"Well, at any case we've tried during the whole journey to make Thorin and Bilbo see that they are in love with each other", said Fíli, returning to the original topic, "but nothing, absolutely nothing, has happened so far."

"Thalia, gimme that rock", Dwalin ordered. Thalia picked the rock up even though she did wonder why he needed it. "From this distance I could be able to hit the back of Thorin's head and this rock is big enough to nudge him. Should I give it a shot?"

Kíli struggled not to laugh and Fíli said why not. Jon and Robb still didn't understand the whole thing but they decided it was the culture differences. Maybe relationships between two men were perfectly acceptable among the Dwarves and the Hobbits. It was strange but the lads just let it be. Dwalin took aim and threw the rock. It did hit Thorin to the back of his head but at the wrong spot. Thorin cursed loudly and rubbed the spot the rock had hit.

"Son of a bitch, I missed", Dwalin huffed.

"I suppose the angle was wrong", stated Arya. When the others turned to give her surprised looks, she continued, "Well, taking the distance I think the throw shouldn't have been done the way Master Dwalin did it."

Dwalin thought of it for a moment and then swore so badly that Robb had to cover Arya's ears. "Well of course", he grunted. "I'm starting to get rusty."

Then Fíli and Kíli decided to take the medical herbs to Thorin (Thalia had checked twice that the herbs were what they should've been) because otherwise they would have raised suspicions. Thalia, Arya, Robb, Jon and Dwalin joined them not long after. Thalia checked on Bilbo's wound before giving Thorin permission to finish with the binding.

"Excellent treatment, I must say."

"It was not exactly the first wound I have treated in my life", said Thorin, "and I doubt it will be the last."

"Well, at least I'm not hurt anymore and it doesn't even smart", added Bilbo. Thorin smiled and squeezed his shoulder gently. Right out of the blue Thalia started to look like she was about to cry.

"What is it?" Thorin asked worryingly.

"You two are so stupid!" shrieked Thalia. "You're so stupid that even the Orcs will start laughing at you one of these days!"

And Thalia left just like that, apparently looking for usable arrows from Orc bodies, or so she said. Fíli decided to go help her and try to make her calm down (although he did agree with her with his whole heart). Thorin and Bilbo looked at each other, not understanding anything, and that made Kíli and Dwalin turn around so that they wouldn't give their frustration away.

"What on earth came over her?" Bilbo wondered, though he did have a slight hunch why Thalia had lost it so abruptly.

"Perhaps it is that time of the month for her", Thorin suggested. He knew what he was talking about if he knew women at all. Thalia's sudden switch with mood was similar to that of Dís when she had that time of the month.

"Nope, not for another week. Trust me, it's not that", said Kíli and shook his head. He went after his brother and Thalia while muttering insults in Khuzdul. Thorin didn't hear them but Dwalin did and he decided to give the lad a lecture later. Jon and Robb got up and went to help Glóin, Bifur and Bofur with the tent.

Kíli found his brother and Thalia sitting on a big boulder, legs in the air. Fíli had wrapped his arms around Thalia and was talking to her in a calming manner. She was crying out of pure frustration over Bilbo and Thorin. Kíli sat next to them, not saying anything. They didn't need words when he put his hand on her shoulder. Thalia sniffed and wiped her eyes.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to burst like that", she said. "I must be PMS-ing. Would not be a surprise, actually."

"It's alright", said Fíli. "I almost snapped too. But tonight we'll end this pain in the arse. We should've carried out the ultimate plan B and finished with operation Bagginshield ages ago."

"Yes, we should've", echoed Kíli. "I mean we should've done it the day Bilbo left Erebor. I say we deal with this thing right now. It's quite enough we 'accidentally' push Thorin. Bilbo can't really move at the moment, now can he?"

Thalia sneezed loudly to a handkerchief she had dug from her pocket (Fíli and Kíli grinned at each other – the handkerchief Bilbo had forgotten during the last adventure had become a great inside joke) and nodded firmly. Yes, they would take this thing out of their schedule now, within five minutes – or as soon as Thalia again had a hold over her emotions. They agreed they'd share the full responsibility on everything, except the stone Dwalin had thrown.

"All good?" Fíli checked from Thalia before they began carrying out the plan.

"Yeah", answered Thalia. "Let's do it before I screw everything up 'cause my hands are shaking."

"By the way", said Kíli, "I thought of something when the battle ended. Thalia, since you don't like your last name, why not make up an additional name for you? I mean something similar to Oakenshield. I actually have a pretty good one in my mind."

Thalia made a snort. "Well if it's something like 'Terrorshield', just forget it. I hear enough jokes about Aegis as it is."

"Don't be silly, silly", sighed Kíli. "I thought of something like Thunderspear. How does that sound to you?"

Thalia pondered it and tasted the name in her mind. It seemed like a perfectly valid option and soon she answered, "It's good, its' really good. I suppose it makes this the last day I'll go by the name Thalia Grace."

"Thalia Thunderspear", grinned Fíli. "I like that, it's got a nice sound. Well done, Kee."

Kíli seemed extremely pleased with himself.

While Fíli, Kíli and Thalia had made their decision, Arya was giving Thorin and Balin a thorough explanation on the song she had heard the mountains sing. She could still hear it clearly and though she didn't understand the language, the song was about a loss of some sort, she thought to herself. Arya almost felt tearing up when listening to it more carefully.

"What could it mean?" she asked while scratching Nymeria, who was lying on her feet, behind her ear. Arya was sitting on the ground near Bilbo.

"It is rather difficult to say", answered Balin. "It is hard to interpret the song of the mountains because everyone hears it differently. In addition usually only Dwarves can hear the singing. I have never bumped into a human with an ability to hear the song of the mountains."

"Does that make me somehow abnormal?" Arya inquired with wide eyes. Dwalin got up suddenly and said he was going to make sure Dori and Nori had finished their job. Thorin raised his brow a bit but let Dwalin go. He was more interested in Bilbo's condition. The Hobbit was resting at the moment and was reading Ori's journal notes on reclaiming Erebor.

"Well, I would not say abnormal, Arya darling", Balin chuckled, "but you are, however, a very quaint little girl."

"That she is", commented Bilbo. "Kíli told us she killed an Orc by throwing a knife straight to the back of its neck from five metre's distance. We hear it was a perfect hit."

"And it still was sheer beginner's luck", sighed Arya. "It wasn't anything special, honestly."

"Beginner's luck or not, I am grateful that you did it, either way", said Thorin. "I admit I had doubts about you joining the Company in the first place but you do have more battle spirit than any army I have seen, Arya."

Arya made a funny little laugh. She felt odd to hear all these praises. At home she would have provoked the anger of her mother, septa Mordane and her sister Sansa if they had heard she had killed an Orc by throwing a knife at it or that she had participated in a battle. At home the whole idea of a woman fighting her own battles was absurd.

"Oh, while I remember, what do you think is the language of the song?" asked Arya.

"Khuzdul, most likely", answered Thorin. "And if you can still hear it and not understand the words, then I think we should teach you some Khuzdul. I wish there was more time…"

Then, without warning, Thorin felt three pairs of hands in his back. Fíli, Kíli and Thalia had managed to sneak behind him completely unnoticed. Bilbo was still reading Ori's journal and didn't pay any attention on his surroundings, Ori was sketching something to his new journal, and Balin and Arya had been so engaged in their conversation about the song of Misty Mountains that they hadn't noticed anything. Only Gandalf had paid any attention on what was going on but since he knew well what those three were up to he hadn't had any intentions to give them away.

"What are you doing?!" Thorin bellowed.

"Something we should've done weeks ago", Fíli answered strictly.

"Ori, do rescue your journal", advised Kíli. Ori almost jumped and took his journal from Bilbo who was staring at the threesome and Thorin in confusion. Balin was observing the situation worryingly and Arya did the same with some clear interest. Nymeria couldn't have cared less because she was yawning so that her tongue was hanging outside her maw.

"What are you blabbering?" Thorin demanded from Fíli.

"In a nutshell it goes like this", said Thalia, "Thorin, Bilbo, you are the biggest dunderheads I've ever had the misfortune to meet. Just guess if it has been painful to watch how you two are looking at each other wistfully when you think the other isn't looking, and are so disgustingly in love with each other, but haven't done anything for it!"

Bilbo's confusion changed into disbelief and for a moment Thorin looked like he wanted to sink deep into the ground out of pure shame. Gandalf had covered his mouth with one of the sleeves of his robes because he didn't wish to embarrass anyone. Thorin's face was starting to look like a very majestic tomato. And then Fíli, Kíli and Thalia pushed Thorin together so that his lips touched Bilbo's. Bilbo blushed even deeper red than Thorin, but the winner of the overall competition was Ori who had buried himself behind his journal and only his bright carmine red forehead was showing. Later on Fíli and Kíli told Arya and Thalia that it was so only because Dori had raised his youngest brother in a barrel. Then Dwalin returned with Dori and Nori and grinned when seeing what was going on.

"About time", he laughed while Dori ran to cover Ori's eyes and ears (as if there had even been a need for that). Balin did disapprove of the method Fíli, Kíli and Thalia were using but he would have lied if he had said this was something he hadn't wanted to happen. Arya, in turn, had covered her eyes and said she didn't even want to see her own parents kiss each other, much less other people.

When the threesome finally let go of Thorin, he left the place with amazing speed, muttering something about checking the tent. Balin shook his head and chuckled.

"Now that was one trick you three pulled", he said.

"We had to do something", answered Kíli. "Please forgive us, Bilbo, but you two really didn't leave us other choices."

"It's alright", said Bilbo quietly.

"Did you have to do that when Ori was present?!" Dori screamed so that it made everyone startle, including Dwalin and Nori who had long since grown used to terrible noises.

"See here, Dori, you can't keep Ori in a barrel forever", snapped Nori. "Plus I do think Ori has seen more terrible things than two blokes kissing while the other bloke's nephews are pushing his back. Does the Battle of Five Armies ring any bells, perhaps?"

Dori glared at his brother and Nori glared back. Fíli, Kíli and Thalia calmed the situation by apologising to Ori, though. Dwalin and Arya were merely rolling their eyes. Bilbo, in his part, was nibbling a too long strand of hair in nervousness. He had never believed his feelings could've been outed in a way like this. And how on earth had Fíli, Kíli and Thalia known? He had been so precise, so careful not to reveal anything. Apparently the threesome was more observant than Bilbo had ever assumed. Truth be told it was a bit disturbing. In addition Bilbo was concerned of Thorin's reaction to the whole thing. The King had been so embarrassed when he had excused himself. What could they make of this in the future? What if they wouldn't be able to even look at each other because they had been so thoroughly embarrassed? Bilbo didn't even dare to wish there could be a better twist in the plot.

* * *

I can't believe I made Thorin talk about menstruation. Tolkien must be rolling over in his grave.

And it's a movie canon fact that Dori mothers Ori. And I think it's kinda cute in its own way.

AND FINALLY THEY KISSED! Well, Fíli, Kíli and Thalia did help but still. ABOUT TIME YOU TWATS! When I finally wrote that part, I looked at this Bagginshield picture on my wall and laughed, "Ha ha, beat ya suckers!"

And Dwalin rules.


	17. Chapter 17

I remember this chapter took me a long time to write when I wrote it in Finnish because these two idiots refused to work the way I wanted. Well, at least I kept up with my plans and didn't wander like I usually do.

Chapter was rather inspired by the Finnish version of Can You Feel the Love Tonight? I was listening to it when I wrote this and at some point I realised how fit for Thorin and Bilbo it is. The Finnish version, I mean. The English version is also fit, of course, but not the same way.

* * *

Chapter seventeen

Where They Take Wages and Talk About Cultural Differences

**~..~**

Thorin kicked a stone out of frustration. He'd kill Fíli and Kíli, he'd seriously kill them, no matter the consequences. In passing he also considered murdering Thalia, but gave up the idea because he did not want to anger any gods (from what he had gathered from Thalia's tales, both Zeus and Artemis had quite a temper). He had enough to deal with a furious Dwarf lady who also happened to be his younger sister. Thorin buried his face in his hands. How could he ever be able to look Bilbo in the eye after this shameful incident? Thalia had said that they loved each other but Thorin just was not able to believe it. He found it rather irrational that they were even friends – for pity's sake, he had tried to kill Bilbo because of the blasted Arkenstone! Thorin still did not understand how Bilbo had ever been able to forgive him. Hobbits sure were incredible creatures, Thorin gave them that.

"M' Lord? May I have a word?"

It was Glóin. The tent was up and Bofur was cooking something. Thorin took a deep breath to get himself together and asked, "What is it, Glóin?"

"Your sister asked me to give you this", said Glóin and gave Thorin a sealed envelope. "She did not look too pleased when she gave it to me… actually if we're exact, she seemed rather murderous."

"Oh dear", mumbled Thorin. "What have I done wrong this time?"

"If I know her ladyship at all, then she must think it's something dead serious", Glóin smirked. "Read it. My da always used to say that it's the best to face unpleasant things as soon as possible so they won't haunt you later."

Thorin sighed deeply and opened the envelope as soon as Glóin had left him alone. He wished to survive at least from his sister's letter without an audience. Besides, knowing Dís the letter would also be rather aggravating. "Well", Thorin said to himself, "it will not get any better if I keep dawdling." And so he opened the envelope and began to read.

* * *

_Erebor, 14th of May, 2943_

_To my brother Thorin who is the biggest twat ever lived in Middle-Earth _("Could you finally make up something new, Dís", Thorin muttered)_,_

_ What the hell are you playing at down there?! I received a letter from Gandalf where he tells you're stuck in Lothlórien because you went and managed to lose Kíli on your way to Moria. Exactly how damn stupid are you? I told you to look after my boys! If Gandalf hadn't assured me in his letter that both my sons are alive and in good health, I'd gone with Dwalin and murdered you with my own bare hands._

_ To switch the topic, I've also been given the image that you have feelings for a Mr. Bilbo Baggins (Gandalf hinted something like that, as did Fíli and Kíli before leaving for your suicide mission, Mahal bless them), but you're not doing anything for the matter. Thorin, if Mr. Baggins has given any signs he feels the same way to you, then for Durin's sake do something! You have every right to be with the person you love (Fíli and Kíli have praised Mr. Baggins from earth to heaven and I trust them at this matter). Stop being a bloody idiot and tell him how you feel – as far as you can express them, we all know you have the emotional range of a teaspoon._

_ Everything is well here… oh well, I'd be better if I didn't have to suffer from a herd of dolts every day. I can hardly wait for your return. The deadly boring meetings of the council are just the right punishment for you. You're going to suffer a slow and painful death… All right, fine, that was a joke. But you are needed here, so return as soon as possible, do I make myself clear?_

_ Anyway, just bring Fíli and Kíli home safe and healthy when possible and if you can, bring also Mr. Baggins. I am dying to meet him. From what I have gathered from the tales of Óin and Bombur (I've been asking them a couple of things and they've been answering very generously), he seems like a very charming Halfling and very suitable partner for you if it comes to that – and I hope it does. Mahal knows you need someone with some sense in their head by your side._

_ Send Fíli and Kíli (and Mr. Baggins) my love._

_ Your loving sister (although not sure you deserve it),_

_ Dís_

* * *

Thorin stared at the letter and could not believe his eyes. So did also Dís know about his feelings for Bilbo? Gandalf was going to pay for this. Thorin did not know when or how, but one day the wizard would pay for sticking his long nose in other people's businesses. Thorin made an angry huff. He had liked his sister better when she had still been a tiny snotnose who threw wooden knives around, usually at Frerin or Dwalin. At the point where Dís had grown up she had started to stick her nose in other people's businesses very much like Gandalf, especially Thorin's love life (or rather the lack of thereof, apart from some one night things that they did not talk about). At any rate Thorin could not understand how it was possible that basically everyone had known he was in love with Bilbo even before he himself had realised it. Was he really that obvious?

"Uh, your majesty, dinner is ready", Robb called. Thorin was startled by it.

"Oh, right", he answered. "Thank you Robb, I will be there in a minute."

The others were already eating when Thorin finally arrived after reading Dís' letter two more times (he wasn't sure when he had become such a masochist – probably around the same time he had fallen in love with Bilbo). Bilbo gave him a quick glance and then looked back at his plate full of stew. Fíli, Kíli and Thalia weren't able to meet Thorin's gaze either. They were the only ones to eat in full silence. The others were having lively conversations and occasionally threw food around. To Thorin it was like Bag End all over again, although Óin and Bombur weren't there and they were joined by three teenaged humans and one child. Robb and Jon had given their swords for Dwalin to examine and he said they were perfectly fine weapons, considering they were made by Men. Arya in turn was chatting with Bofur and learning the Dwarvish sign language, Iglishmêk, simultaneously to be able to converse with Bifur. It was mainly because Arya was fascinated how Bifur had got an axe in his skull and survived. Bofur said very proudly it was because the Dwarves had thick skulls.

"And not a small amount of resilience and Bifur seems to be pretty damn resilient", Arya grinned and Bofur translated. Bifur seemed very delighted and started to blabber something in Khuzdul so fast that no one managed to understand what he was saying.

"What the heck did he say?" Thalia whispered to Fíli and Kíli.

"I have no idea", answered Kíli. "Bifur has spoken this dialect of ancient Khuzdul ever since he got that axe in his head. Or at least I think it's ancient Khuzdul…"

"It's hard to tell what's going on with Bifur", added Fíli. "More often than not it's safest to just nod along and smile. Works like a charm."

"Oi there, was it Thalia", Nori called out

"Yeah", answered Thalia. "What?"

"What is your weapon of choice?" asked Nori.

Thalia was rather taken aback of the question because she was hardly ever asked that. On the other hand she was also pleased. "Oh, I use a spear and a shield. I can also fight with a sword and shoot with bow and arrows, plus use a hunting knife, but spear is my primary weapon of choice."

Nori gave a nod. "Thought you might use a spear. You seem just that type of a person."

After this Fíli, Kíli and Thalia participated in the conversations actively, but were still keeping some distance to both Thorin and Bilbo. Thorin was glaring at them in the manner that they had to be cautious or they would be murdered in their bedrolls. They had no such fear when it came to Bilbo, but they were badly embarrassed either way.

Bilbo was eating in complete silence. Everyone realised he was not in the mood where he wanted to chat and so everyone left him in peace. From time to time Bilbo glanced at Thorin who wasn't in a talkative mood either. He let out a small sigh. If there was any believing in Thorin's nephews and Thalia, then they did share similar feelings for each other, but what should they do now? Bilbo knew he had to talk things through with Thorin one time or another but at that moment he simply did not have enough courage… or at least it would take him forever to gather it. The whole situation was awkward, there was no denying it. Bilbo ate some more spoonfuls of the stew Bofur had made and started to think what he could say to Thorin once he'd had gathered the courage and talked to him at last. He couldn't possibly know that Thorin was thinking of the exact same thing, had actually done so during the whole meal (whenever he wasn't glaring at Fíli, Kíli and Thalia).

Thorin was, if possible, even more nervous about the matter than Bilbo. The Dwarves only fell in love once and being rejected was equal to the end of the world. That was the reason so few Dwarves ever chose to marry, or even start courting: the fear of being rejected was too great. There were a few exceptions, though, Glóin as the best example. Glóin was actually talking about his son Gimli at that very moment, and no one seemed to be interested. Thorin actually heard Kíli mutter that "if I have to hear one more story of The Amazing Deeds of Gimli the Great, I'll cram Bofur's cooking fork in my throat". Thorin made a silent short laugh. Kíli was always so dramatic. Thorin actually was rather fond of Glóin's stories, even if they started to be repetitive at some point. They made him think what it would be like to live in perfect peace, without that many worries. And then Thorin knew what he had to do.

Bilbo was greatly surprised when Thorin got up suddenly, walked to him and said, "Bilbo, I need a word with you. Alone, to be precise."

"Oh… alright", Bilbo squeaked for an answer and walked out of the tent after Thorin. Bofur lit his pipe with a lot of grinning and said, "Wanna bet it only takes a few moments and then they are practically eating each other's faces?"

"Clarify the time a bit 'cause I can take time", answered Thalia. And so they all started to take wages on what would happen and when. Gandalf was chuckling with a pipe in his mouth at the Dwarves and their whims but ended up participating himself. Only Arya, Robb, Jon and Ori did not lay their bets (though Ori didn't do it only because Dori forbade it). Thalia did not put her drachmas in either but it was only because she was taking time and had to remain impartial.

Bilbo and Thorin walked some yards away until the voices coming from the tent were just vague noises in the background. They both were nervous about this situation. Everything Bilbo had planned to say to Thorin simply disappeared from his head, and Thorin was thinking too much of everything, mostly his fears. But as Grandpa Thrór had used to say, in situations like this one one just had to grab the Dwarf by the beard, as was the phrase. Thorin breathed a couple of times before saying, "Bilbo, at first I wish to apologise on behalf of my nephews. I promise they will be punished."

"There's no need for that", Bilbo answered quickly. "They're ashamed anyway, I know they are."

"Secondly", Thorin continued as though Bilbo had not said anything, "I must confess that the thing the lads and Thalia said about my, uh, feelings… well, it was not entirely untrue. No, wait, I correct that: it was… it was completely true."

For the umpteenth time that night Bilbo blushed bright red. Even though it was not exactly a direct confession of love, coming from Thorin's mouth it roughly meant "I love you so bloody much, shall we have at it now?" Well, maybe not that frankly put but it was more or less the bottom line of Thorin's words. Thorin was looking at the tips of his boots and nibbled the fur collar of his coat nervously. Bilbo had never seen him this shy before. To be quite honest it was rather endearing, really.

"Thirdly", said Thorin, and now he started to sound extremely unsure, "I want to say that I understand if you do not feel the same, but I… I do want to be with you."

"Thorin…" Bilbo started.

"I also understand if you don't wish to speak to me ever again, this is rather sudden, I know –"

"Thorin…"

" – but I must speak my mind because otherwise I will just keep churning in my thoughts and get nothing done…"

"Thorin…" Bilbo began to sound irritated.

"… I can't believe I can even say these things. To be honest this is the first time I've ever spoken this frankly to anyone –"

"THORIN! Will you please shut up for five seconds!" Bilbo yelled. Thorin shut his mouth immediately and somewhere behind them a pack of Dwarves plus a wizard and three humans gathered to the mouth of the tent to see what was going on.

Bilbo sighed deeply and said, "You know what, your nephews and Thalia are absolutely correct. We really are stupid. Yes, and you don't need to worry because I feel the same for you and I want to be with you too."

Afterwards it was very unclear which one of them had initiated the kiss (or if they had done it simultaneously) but it didn't matter much. Thorin had never been so happy, not even that day on the top of Carrock when he had seen the Lonely Mountain in the horizon for the first time in decades. Bilbo, for his part, felt like he was about to explode. Thorin was a very good kisser, no complaints there at all, even though it was rather clumsy at first.

The moment would have been perfect if they hadn't abruptly heard from the tent a lot of whistling, Thalia's fascinated sight (because it could not be Arya, Mahal forbid) and Dwalin's sarcastic yell, "Lads, go have at it in the bushes and stop ruining the scenery!" It got even worse when Fíli, Kíli and Thalia got their greatest flash of genius ever and started to sing (out of tune).

_ "Can you feel the love tonight?  
The peace the evening brings  
The world for once in perfect harmony  
With all its living things…"_

"I will kill them all", Thorin mumbled against Bilbo's lips. "I will kill them and hang them up to a tree from their testicles."

Bilbo laughed. "Please don't do that. It would make a terrible mess. Besides, your sister would never forgive you if you did so."

Unfortunately it was true but Thorin couldn't help it, he just automatically started to boil when Fíli and Thalia continued singing, this time in two solo parts. Bilbo was trying to hold his laughter. Thorin was once again looking like a majestic tomato, although this time it was because he was trying to control his rage.

_"So many things to tell him  
But how to make him see  
The truth about my past (Impossible!)  
He'd turn away from me"_

_"He's holding back, he's hiding_  
_But what? I can't decide_  
_Why won't he be the king I know he is_  
_The king I see inside?"_

Kíli burst into roaring laughter while the other Dwarves asked for an explanation. Thalia explained with her whole face in a grin what the song was all about (and also told them the plot of _The Lion King_) and added, "Oh by the way, who guessed it took six minutes, including yelling and an extremely hot kiss?"

Bofur seemed very pleased with himself when the others started to grit their teeth and throw their pouches of gold at him. Arya was giggling so much she fell on her back, Jon was scratching the annoyed Ghost from the back of his ear and Robb was rolling his eyes at all this. The Dwarves sure were a peculiar lot. The lads looked at each other, grinning, when Fíli, Kíli and Thalia once again continued singing (they could say a lot of things about the pitch) and at some point Thorin bellowed, "SILENT!" That didn't much jerk the threesome. They just carried on as if there had been no interruption. At that point it started to get also on Bilbo's nerves

"On the other hand the murdering and the hanging begin to sound tempting", he muttered. "No privacy whatsoever, then."

"Best you try to get used to it", said Thorin. "We might just be able to get rid of the other twats, but I can swear Fíli and Kíli will not leave us in peace even if it killed them."

Thorin's words were convinced when the singing out of tune just went on and on, and it made Bilbo moan out loud.

_"Can you feel the love tonight?  
You needn't look too far  
Stealing through the night's uncertainties  
Love is where they are…"_

Thankfully someone (probably Balin) asked Fíli, Kíli and Thalia to change the song. And since Thalia was on fire that night, she began to have a wide-scale performance of her favourite music (though she did leave Queen's songs to Fíli, Kíli, Arya and Jon – Robb decided to sing "We Are the Champions" with them because he liked the song). Thorin and Bilbo let out a relieved sigh. Maybe now they'd have a moment alone. They had so much to talk about and go through. The culture of the Hobbits was so different from that of the Dwarves that there were some things they preferred to talk through now so that there would not be any awkward and unfortunate misunderstandings. Bilbo also knew that from now on there would be a lot of pressure and expectations aimed at him, Thorin, after all, was a king. Talking about being a king…

"Thorin, I'm asking out of pure interest that don't you have to, um, father heirs?"

Thorin simply shrugged. "Not exactly. Fíli and Kíli fill that gap. As my nephews they have just as much claim to the throne as would any of my direct descendants, so we won't have to worry about that. And if we're exact, many a Dwarf counts them as my sons. After all, I did raise them… or at least I tried to. Dís spoiled them rotten."

"Hey!" they heard Kíli's loud objection from the tent. "Don't start mocking Mum!"

"Yeah, do you really want us to tell her you questioned her methods in raising us?" Fíli echoed. "Bilbo, if I were you I'd start thinking what sort of flowers you'll put on Thorin's grave, because if Mum hears …"

Bilbo made a slight snort (lilies-of-the-valley might be perfect, he thought) and rolled his eyes. Well, this was all his fault, this was what he got from going and falling in love with a Dwarf who had a very crazy and insane kin. On the other hand he did want to meet Dís. He wanted to find out whether or not she was as scary as he was told. Fíli and Kíli emphasised often how Dís was at that moment the only living thing in Middle-Earth of whom Thorin was truly afraid. Thorin denied it every time, though and said he only felt healthy respect to his sister, as she was not only a very sharp woman but also very good at throwing knives.

"Now see here, lads, if you won't shut up and leave Bilbo and me alone now, I shall see if you're not too old for thorough bashing", Thorin made threats. They heard laughter from the tent, from which Bilbo deduced that the boys did not take the threat seriously. Soon Fíli put his head out of the tent and said, "Uncle dear, after Mum's treatment your threats are mainly ridiculous. She did give us a thorough bashing, as you put it, only a couple of weeks before going on this quest."

"What kind of mess have I got myself into?" Bilbo bemoaned.

"The kind you've never seen before?" Thalia suggested helpfully after appearing above Fíli and by that statement received a smile from both Bilbo and Thorin. Luckily she also added that she, Fíli and Kíli would now leave them alone.

"Finally", grunted Thorin. And so he and Bilbo continued going through the cultural differences (though it was open for argument how intense that discussion was, because the both of them were about to get distracted all the time).

Meanwhile Balin had started to explain Jon and Robb, who had got interested in the matters, about the same things about the differences, although the emphasis was on the Dwarves's side of the coin. Balin was very thorough, and the boys couldn't help but be amazed of his memory. Jon was listening silently but Robb asked some questions every now and then, if he wanted some things to be cleared.

"Let me get this straight: the same-gender relationships are perfectly acceptable among the Dwarves, right?" asked Robb.

"Oh yes", Balin smiled. "Only one third of our people are female, so defining relationships only for different genders has never worked. In addition to that Dwarves only love once, and naturally one cannot control with whom they fall in love with. Although because of this our birth rate is very low, because not even nearly every Dwarf wishes to marry, and there aren't that many children who are born out of wedlock."

"Why not?" asked Jon.

"For some reason it is not accepted", explained Balin. "There are few marriages because most Dwarves dread that they are rejected. There are illegitimate children born maybe five out of one thousand and often the child's background is hidden in those cases. More often than not the other parent of the child is not a Dwarf and too often the child is given away because of it. There are Dwarves who want to keep our race 'clean' as they say, and won't accept for example a relationship between a Man and a Dwarf."

"Does it happen often, I mean, that a child is born out of a relationship like that?" Jon continued.

"No. It doesn't happen that regularly that a Dwarf falls in love with someone from another race. There are exceptions to this rule, naturally", said Balin and pointed at the mouth of the tent, referring to Thorin and Bilbo. Robb and Jon nodded, smiling at each other. Neither of them had a problem with Thorin and Bilbo sharing their bedroll from now on. If it was accepted among the Dwarves, they had no right to say it was wrong. Besides, they both thought that there should never be anything wrong with love.

"To unused eyes the culture of the Dwarves is rather complicated", Gandalf said after blowing out a couple of smoke rings.

"You said it, Gandalf", Balin chuckled. "Trust me, laddies, even many Dwarves are confused when it comes to our traditions."

Bilbo and Thorin only returned when everyone else was asleep. Neither of them had energy to hear any more teasing, no matter how good-natured it was. Bifur was on watch but he was the type that did not chaff. He just grinned and put his thumb up. Everyone else was sleeping. Thorin was a bit surprised to see that this night Arya was sleeping between Robb and Jon probably for the first time during the entire journey (everyone was so used to see her sleep with Fíli and Kíli). In turn he was not surprised that Thalia had nuzzled against Fíli's other side (Kíli was naturally on the other side). With a smile Thorin place two bedrolls, two pillows and a blanket opposite to his nephews, close to Dwalin. There was a lot of noise in the tent because Dwalin, Glóin and Kíli were snoring in a choir. Bilbo yawned and nuzzled against Thorin on the bedroll. Thorin put the blanket over them carefully and wrapped his arms around his Hobbit just before the both of them fell asleep. Bifur chuckled to himself. He might have had an axe in his skull but he was not stupid. He'd never seen his king so happy before, even if the births of Fíli and Kíli and the reclaiming of Erebor were counted in.

Bifur watched Bilbo and Thorin for a moment before taking his watch turn again. The Orcs had to be very stupid if they tried to attack this night. Thank goodness the tent blended in despite its size, and most likely the Orcs would think the snoring was some kind of noise made by a terrible monster. Other than that the night was warm. Some time at night Ghost woke up and walked to Bifur to keep him company. Bifur did not mind, he just scratched Ghost's head. He waved his tail and looked vigilant. He raised his head a bit when Thalia yawned in her sleep and pressed herself tighter against Fíli. Other than that nothing happened during the night – no one minded.

* * *

First menstruation and now testicles. I am so sorry, Professor Tolkien, I did not mean to.

Okay, I base the Dwarven culture mainly on my headcanons that have formed from the many Hobbit fics I've read because Tolkien never mentioned much about it (I did go through the appendix of The Return of the King and tried to stick as close to canon as possible).

And if you ask me, there's too little Bifur in the fics, so I wanted to bring him up now.

And unsure Thorin is almost the cutest thing ever. (Almost, because there's nothing cuter than stupid Kíli.) I have a headcanon that when Thorin is very nervous, he starts to blabber.

And the inspiration to interpreting Thorin's words as "I love you so bloody much, shall we have at it now?" came from this post in Tumblr where it said, "In Middle-Earth we don't say 'I love you'. Instead we say 'I have never been so wrong in all my life' which can also translate to 'I wanna fuck your brains out'." or something like that.


	18. Chapter 18

I remember this chapter was a relief to write when I wrote it in Finnish once I had all university entrance exams off my neck (I failed them, though). Otherwise this was a rather difficult chapter hence all the feelings.

* * *

Chapter eighteen

Where No One Wants to Go

**~..~**

"Say Uncle Bilbo, are you now coming to Erebor with us?" Kíli asked the following morning at breakfast. Thalia was recently introducing her honey-laced cereals to a pack of suspicious Dwarves. Ori was the only one who dared to taste out of politeness. Everyone else just poked the cereals with their spoons and wondered how anyone could eat them. Bilbo raised his look from his bowl of cereals and looked at Kíli who looked enthusiastic and suffering at the same time (suffering because Fíli had painfully poked his side). This wakened also Thorin's interest. They hadn't discussed over this matter just yet.

Bilbo tilted his head a bit and answered, "I haven't decided yet. I mean, I haven't decided whether I'll come now or a little later. At some point I must visit Bag End, naturally, but…"

"You have to come now!" announced Kíli. "Mum wants to meet you, especially now that you're family! Family members have to stick together!"

"Kíli!" hissed Fíli.

"What? That's what Mama always says!"

Bilbo couldn't help a smile. "Actually that's what my mother used to say too."

Kíli gave his brother a smirk, as if to say "there you have it" and put out his tongue. Fíli did the same and as a result Arya, Jon and Robb were wriggling in laughter. Thorin had a fleeting fancy to bang his head against a wall – that is, if there had been one nearby. Perhaps Thalia would borrow Aegis for that purpose…? How was it even possible that Thorin had such idiotic nephews? It had to come from the boys' father's side of the tree, no such stupidity had ever been in the line of Durin. Bilbo, however, just smiled at the lads and Thorin could not help wondering how patient he was. Hobbits sure were marvellous creatures. Thorin sank his fingers into Bilbo's hair.

"Just go romp in the bushes", Dwalin said, not bothering to look up from his bowl of cereals, which he had also now dared to taste. Both Thorin and Bilbo froze and gave Dwalin horrified looks. Balin shook his head. As soon as they'd be back in Erebor he'd make his brother wash his mouth with soap. Gandalf was laughing by himself and smoking his pipe. Dwalin looked extremely pleased with himself, which made everyone else laugh. Bilbo could have sworn this whole scene was Bag End all over again.

Thalia sighed quietly. This was the first time during the entire journey when she felt like she was a complete outsider. She hadn't known anyone before-handed prior this quest, was not related to anyone, let alone had been someone's sweetheart (she grimaced at the whole word. It was far too sappy for her taste). She also knew that now that they had got the map back her ways with the rest of the Company would inevitably part. She'd return alone to America, to the country that had been her home for so many years, but that did not feel like one any longer. Middle-Earth was completely (oh well, not completely anymore) unknown place for her but every single boulder, blade of grass and riverbend felt more home than the United States had ever felt. The Company in turn was the first proper family for her since the years she had spent with Annabeth and Luke. Sure, the Hunters provided her safety and company, but they didn't feel like a family, not the same way. There was this certain sort of warmth in the Company that the Hunters lacked.

But Thalia knew she had to go. Artemis and the Hunters were most likely mad by worry by now, she had after all disappeared without a warning. She would've blamed Gandalf in any other situation, but without his intervention she wouldn't have experienced this adventure or got new friends. She'd miss them all, but especially Arya, Fíli and Kíli. They were like siblings to her. Thalia had never properly got over of Jason's disappearance but thanks to this adventure the pain had finally started to fade. She wasn't sure whether or not she should've felt guilty of it but either way she was thankful that especially thanks to Fíli she no longer saw nightmares of the day when Jason went missing.

Thalia woke up from her thoughts and laughed along the others when Kíli asked, "Hey, when are you going to get married?" Bilbo flushed bright scarlet and Thorin buried his face in his hands and looked as though he was crying (or laughing, Thalia wasn't absolutely sure how to interpret the weird shaking).

"Kíli my lad, don't agitate Bilbo any further", Balin chortled in good nature. "Let us begin with him coming to Erebor and meeting your mother."

"That you don't have to worry about, Uncle Bilbo", assured Fíli. "Mama likes you already, she said so herself some time before we left for this quest. We've told her everything about you and she wants you to be family already because quote you'd be the first sensible person in all Erebor since Balin."

"So that's the image your mother has of me", grinned Bilbo after recovering from the surprise. "Thank you very much. I do hope Dís likes me also after we've officially met."

"Of course she will", said Kíli excitedly. "Mama also said that no one who has the guts to stand against Uncle can be absolutely hopeless."

"I will kill her", grunted Thorin.

"Never gonna happen", laughed Kíli.

Thalia sighed again. This was what she'd miss the most: bickering about tiny matters in warm manner, just like it should be in a family.

"Thalia?"

Jon had somehow managed to stalk behind Thalia in secret and scared her now very badly. Thalia cursed out loud. Such a damn rookie mistake, Artemis would scold her. Thalia had let her guard go down. The first thing Lady Artemis had taught her the day she had joined the Hunters had been constant vigilance. Always be on your guard. Thank goodness it was only Jon and not an Orc, for example.

"By River Styx, don't scare me like that Jon!" she exclaimed. "I almost got a heart attack!"

"Sorry", said Jon sincerely. "I only wished to check if everything is alright with you."

No, it bloody well is not, Thalia wanted to scream. How could anything be alright with me if a land where I've only been for a couple of months feels more like a home than the country I've lived in my whole life? Thalia didn't want to make a childish scene, though, so she answered with a strained smile, "Yeah, just feeling a tad wistful, that's all. The missions' accomplished now so I reckon we'll break up one of these days."

"WHAT?!" shrieked Kíli. "What do you mean we'll break up?! No way!"

"Kíli, calm down", said Thorin.

"I won't calm down! Thalia, for Durin's sake, don't be daft, we cannot just break up! We're family!"

Afterwards Thalia couldn't say exactly whether she had acted in an emotional haze of PMS symptoms or for some other reason, but she burst into tears and gave Kíli a rib-cracking hug. Kíli had never been so taken aback. He had never been used to weeping girls, so he merely clapped Thalia's back without an idea what to do.

It took at least fifteen minutes to get Thalia calm down. She was very embarrassed of the scene she had caused and said she was sorry about it over and over again. This wasn't like her. She had never before started to cry like this.

"Not all tears are evil, Thalia", said Gandalf. "Sometimes crying helps."

Thalia sipped tea Bilbo had offered her. "But still. I don't usually cry. Prior this journey I hadn't cried for many months."

"Well, at least I got assured that not everything is alright with you", stated Jon in passing. Thalia glared at him, thanks to which everyone knew she was back on her feet. Thalia's glaring was frightening enough to scare anyone, except maybe Thorin (and that was just because Thorin had a similar glare himself).

Arya knew almost exactly how Thalia was feeling at the moment. She didn't fancy leaving either, especially because at home she was waited by a lecture from her mother, septa Mordane and in worst case also Sansa, grounding and the confiscation of Needle – which was the most terrible idea ever. Arya didn't want to be forced to sit sweetly with the other girls and do stitches. She wanted to perfect her fighting skills, to become a real warrior just like Thorin, Fíli and Kíli – and Thalia. Nymeria put her head in Arya's lap as if she had guessed what was troubling her mistress, and she scratched the back of her ear. Oh, Arya would have given anything just to see this adventure go on a bit longer.

Jon was almost torn apart. On one hand he was already a bit homesick and it would be nice to see father, Bran and Rickon again, but on the other he'd miss the feeling of freedom he had experienced. In Middle-Earth no one had (at least yet) looked down to him and regarded him as their inferior just because he was a bastard. At home he was always forced to hear people mock him (although usually Robb would pay the mockers back, unless Jon had already punched the bullies himself). In addition Jon knew he'd miss Fíli and Kíli, especially their sense of humour. Yes, going home would be hard. Ghost seemed to enjoy Middle-Earth as well, since no one saw him as a freak. On Jon's scale there were so many weirder things in Middle-Earth that an albino direwolf was actually something relatively normal.

Robb did not have to be psychic to know what was going on in the heads of his brother and sister. Neither of them was very willing to go home. Robb himself missed Winterfell dearly and wanted to return to show off not only his new skills but also his battle scars. Plus he was wondering how Bran and Rickon were faring. Had Bran already picked a name for his direwolf? And yet… very much like Jon Robb would miss the sense of freedom, which in his case culminated to the fact that here he could only be Robb Stark. He did not have to be Robb Stark, eldest son of Eddard Stark and the heir to Winterfell. Robb was proud of his title and happy for the privileges it brought him, but there were times when they chained him too much. At home everyone would've had a fit if they'd known he had taken part in a drinking contest (last one standing was the winner, Robb had lost handsomely to Bofur), but here in Middle-Earth no one thought it was strange. Apparently drinking contests were very common among all races. At home Robb wasn't allowed to have fun the same way. Sure, he had more freedom than Sansa or Arya, but there were times when he wished that he had been born either later or to a bit inferior family.

Kíli did not understand anything. If none of them wanted to go and leave Middle-Earth, then why should they do so? When it came to Arya, Robb and Jon he did understand their duty to their family but Thalia had no such thing as a family. Nothing would stop her from staying. Just a short glance to Fíli told him that his brother was thinking the same.

"I don't want any of you to leave", said Kíli and looked absolutely miserable.

"Well I don't wanna go either but I have to", sighed Thalia. "Lady Artemis and the Hunters must be maddened by worry by now or then think I'm dead. I have to go back."

"Yes but… if they actually think you're dead, then why don't you just stay?"

"Because I have my duty to Artemis and the Hunters. I couldn't be peaceful if I didn't return to America at least for a while and told them I was fine."

Kíli still seemed sceptical and even a bit hurt, so Thalia switched the subject. "Oh, by the way, Bilbo", she said, "how is that wound? I think we need to change the binds around now."

"Let's do it", said Bilbo. "It itches like crazy and I can't scratch it."

"Well, at least that's a sign it's healing", Thalia grinned. Along the years she had come to notice that the faster a wound healed the more it itched.

* * *

They began to move on at around noon. There were no Orcs around anywhere, which raised the moods a lot. Everyone was also cheered up when Bilbo said he had decided to go to Erebor with the Dwarves. Gandalf promised to tell the Shire what was going on and also watch that the Sackville-Bagginses wouldn't get their sticky paws on Bag End. Upon hearing this Fíli and Kíli had practically started to jump out of joy.

Before that they would take Robb, Jon and Arya home. After a bit of persuasion Thalia had decided to linger a bit longer. She was in no hurry. The Stark siblings, however, could not linger much more. It was time for them to return home, as much as Arya dreaded the whole idea. There was most likely going to be a life-long house arrest in front of her. It would not be very fair, Robb and Jon gave that much credit and promised they'd stand up to their baby sister if need be. In the end Arya had been the one who had been for most use in this journey. After all, she was the one who had brought the map out of Moria.

Arya was still hearing the song of Misty Mountains in her ears but did not understand it any better than she had before. After a closer listening it had started to resemble like a lullaby – even somehow a familiar one, which of course was absolutely senseless. There was no way Arya could have known any Khuzdul lullabies. Was she going mad? Arya bit her lip while wondering about the matter. She didn't even notice she was leaving behind the others until Jon put his hand on her shoulder and said, "Arya, keep up. We better not get lost here."

"Sorry", Arya mumbled.

"Are the mountains still singing to you?" asked Jon.

Arya frowned. "You still don't believe me, do you?"

"Please forgive me", Jon said with an apologetic smile. "It just sounds so incredible. I do think on some level I want to believe you, but…"

"You won't until you hear it yourself", Arya filled in. Jon nodded. Arya let out a small huff and continued, "I wouldn't pay so much attention on it otherwise but it sounds strangely familiar, as if I'd heard it somewhere before."

Jon seemed surprised. "Have you mentioned this to anyone?"

"No", answered Arya. "The whole idea is absolutely crazy. I must be imagining it."

"Arya, listen. If you ask me, I think you should go and talk about it with Thorin or Balin. One of them must know what is going on."

Arya sighed. "That's it, really. Usually only Dwarves can hear the song of Misty Mountains. I'm abnormal already in that sense. What do you think would happen if I told them that by the way, the song sounds familiar, have Khuzdul lullabies by any chance spread to Westeros?"

Jon shook his head and said strictly, "I don't deny that you wouldn't be special, but you're not abnormal. You've never been and never will be. Don't you even dare think so."

Arya could've kissed Jon but on their scale it would've been extremely weird, so she settled in only hugging her brother. Jon grinned and patted her back. His sister had never been abnormal or weird to him. Jon thought Arya was simply special, had been ever since she had been a child. For bedtime stories she had always wanted to hear stories of far-off places, famous warriors and magic spells very much unlike Sansa who had preferred traditional stories of brave knights and fair maidens. From those tales Arya had been inspired to become a warrior herself, even though it was frowned on at home. Jon had never thought it was weird, just a tad peculiar, but it made Arya the person she was.

After some time had passed Gandalf announced there was a good place to send Arya, Jon and Robb home. There were some trees around that provided cover. Thorin, Fíli and Kíli would go along to escort the Stark siblings safely back home. Arya saw quite clearly that Fíli and Kíli weren't in a good mood because of it. Thalia didn't seem to be in any better one, since she looked like she was holding back tears (blasted hormones, Arya heard her mutter). Arya took one of her knives off her belt with the sheath.

"Here", she said and offered it back to Thalia.

Thalia made a funny little sniff and said, "Keep it. You'll need it more than I do. Arya, remember then that you'll obey your mother and your sister, and promise me you'll learn to make proper stitches."

"The hell I will!" Arya exclaimed.

"That's my girl", grinned Thalia and Jon burst into laughter. Robb's mouth was twitching. He tried to remain serious and dignified the best he could, but there wasn't much use of it, the way Thalia made jokes.

Thalia bent down and hugged Arya. "Well no, what I truly want is you to promise that you'll train whenever you can. Promise me also that you won't give shit for cross-stitches."

"I promise", replied Arya. "Oh, I wish you were my real sister."

Thalia detached herself a bit and looked Arya in the eye and said, "There's more to sisterhood than just blood-bond. It demands a lot of mutual trust and affection. In my eyes you'll always be my sister. Don't you forget it."

Arya nodded. She would not forget. Then Jon came to embrace Thalia and said that he'd otherwise promise to keep in touch, but there unfortunately were no ravens that flew from Westeros to the United States. Thalia had to laugh at that, after which she had a passing thought that after returning home she could always try Iris-messaging – that is, offering a couple of drachmas to Iris, the Rainbow Goddess who was also an occasional messenger and quite often let demigods communicate via her rainbows. One could never know if Iris-messages worked in communicating between the States, Westeros and Middle-Earth. Thalia did not say anything, though, for she didn't want to raise false hopes.

Then Gandalf announced everything was ready. Once again he had created a silvery circle on the ground, into which Thorin stepped first to check there was no peril in the other side. After Thorin went Robb and Grey Wind, then Fíli and Kíli, and lastly Jon, Arya, Ghost and Nymeria. Arya gave Thalia and Bilbo one last quick glance before disappearing along the others.

* * *

Don't know what else to add. Kíli is a cutie, when they get to Erebor Dwalin will have to wash his mouth with soap, and I like Arya a lot.

And before worrying, I can say that the Stark siblings' part in this story is not over yet.

I guess that's it. There's gonna be more Bagginshield in future chapters (with one or two smut scenes too).


	19. Chapter 19

This chapter has been one of the hardest I've ever written. I listened to "Evacuating London" from The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe when writing it and I suggest you do too.

* * *

Chapter nineteen

Where Thorin Keeps His Promise

**~..~**

Jon knew instantly that something was wrong. The forest was too silent and there was a smell of smoke in the air. He was holding Arya's hand to make sure she wouldn't disappear. Arya glanced first at Jon, then at Robb, and asked, "What is it?"

"I'm not sure", answered Robb. Fíli and Kíli shared a worried look and Thorin frowned. Grey Wind and Nymeria turned towards whence the wind was blowing and snarled a bit. Ghost, in turn, sniffed the ground. That was just enough to tell Jon that something wasn't right.

"Let's go", he said. He feared the worst when remembering how he had felt like he had seen Winterfell like he knew it for the last time the day he, Robb and Arya had left. Jon had, at the time, thought his imagination was toying with him, but now…

They were perhaps half a mile from Winterfell when they saw the smoke. It would not have been anything unusual otherwise, but the smoke was darker and thicker that it would've been if it had risen as it should have from the chimneys of the castle's fireplaces. Grey Wind let out an angry bark and Robb had to hold him from his scruff to prevent him from running anywhere. Jon and Arya were holding each other's hands tighter, and Nymeria yelped.

Winterfell was burning.

"Fíli, Kíli, take Arya back", Thorin ordered.

"What? No way!" shrieked Arya. "I sure as hell won't go!"

"You sure as hell will", snapped Robb. "It's too dangerous here for you and you're too young –"

"And which one of us had to slip through Orcs and gods know what other terrible things just to get one map, pray tell?" Arya retorted.

"Will you both just shut up!" shouted Jon. "We don't have time for this. Arya, be a good girl and go with Fíli and Kíli, please. We don't want you to get in danger anymore."

For a moment Arya looked like she was about to object, but eventually she nodded tearfully. She did understand her brothers' worry but she was equally worried of them. Robb and Jon were equally prone to get in danger and hurt themselves. Sure, they'd have Thorin with them, but still. Nymeria whimpered silently by her side. Jon hugged his sister quickly and promised her they'd see each other soon enough. Then Kíli took Arya's hand and started to take her back to the portal with Fíli.

"Hey, don't look back", Kíli said when Arya was giving Winterfell last tearful glances.

"Yes but…"

"Don't. It'll only increase the pain", interrupted Fíli. Tears were pouring down Arya's face and she didn't even bother to wipe them away. Without any confirmation of the matter she knew that the worst had happen. Winterfell was no more, and neither was her home. The worst, though, was that she did not know what exactly had happened. Where were father and mother? Surely Father could not have let this happen. Father was always so pedantic of Winterfell and the North overall. What had happened to Bran and Rickon? They were still so young, this wasn't fair to them. Ultimately Arya thought of Sansa. Never had they been able to get along, but Arya would've gladly given anything, even Needle, just to know if her sister was still alive. Just the thought of the possibility of Sansa having been burned along with Winterfell made her feel sick. Sansa was always so beautiful, so neat… it could not be true. Sansa couldn't have… Arya squeezed her eyes shut and tried not to think of it, as hard as it was.

Right after Arya had left Robb had run towards Winterfell with Grey Wind. Jon swore his brother's hastiness and went after him, otherwise Robb was bound to end up hurt. Jon had always been more temperamental than his brother but for some reason Robb was the more rash one of the two of them. He never, absolutely never, thought things through, especially not if it was about the family.

"Father! Mother!" Robb shouted after reaching the gates. There was smoke everywhere and no one answered, but Robb would not give up. "Sansa! Bran! Rickon!"

Grey Wind was howling and Robb could've sworn he tried to call for Lady, Shaggydog and Bran's wolf, but in vain. There was no reply. Robb put his hand in Grey Wind's scruff and told him to try finding the scent of at least one of their family members. Grey Wind did what he could but there was too much smoke and it bothered badly his sense of smell.

"Robb! Seven hells, you should at least sometimes think before running into possible danger", Jon cursed after stepping inside the gates of Winterfell, followed by Ghost and Thorin. At that point the smoke was starting to cease and it revealed the devastation there was in Winterfell. The castle was more or less intact, but the stables, for instance, had been badly burned in the fire. Here and there were boards that had dropped, detached or removed stones from the walls and – bodies. Robb and Jon knew it had been best to send Arya away. Their sister sure had seen her fair share of death and destruction, but the victims had been nameless Orcs. Now it was about people who they had known, who had been their friends.

Robb knew he was crying from the rage. He turned to Jon and asked, "Who could have done this?"

Jon looked around. It was clear there had been a battle at Winterfell, but there were no banners or sigils to tell them about the winner. "Let's find out", he said. "There must be survivors here, just must be."

Robb nodded and the brothers started to work. The stables were so badly damaged that Thorin forbade the lads to even go near the place. "You're going to get detached boards into your heads and die", he said strictly. They searched all the other places the best they could but the survivors had either fled or been taken as hostages. After half an hour Robb grew so frustrated that he kicked a helmet that was lying in the ground. Jon had a flash and ran after it. There usually were some kinds of signs of the house of the helm's bearer.

"Can you make anything of it?" asked Thorin.

"No", sighed Jon. "It's too burned. I can make absolutely nothing of it."

Thorin asked to see it. Jon passed him the helmet and continued the search with Ghost. There was no sign of the family, which could've been either a bad or a good thing.

"Boys, you better come see this", Thorin called them after a moment. Robb and Jon arrived and Thorin continued, "It's a tad unclear, but there clearly is a picture of a creature with tentacles in this helmet. Does it say anything to either of you?"

Robb and Jon shared a shocked look. No, it could not be true. Jon had to squeeze Robb's arm so that his legs wouldn't have given in.

"The Greyjoys", Jon spat out the name as if it had been full of poison. "That thrice-cursed Theon Greyjoy has betrayed Winterfell."

"Jon, it was not necessarily Theon", Robb said silently. "There is no proof it was him. It could've been some other Greyjoy."

"There's also no proof that it wasn't Theon", snapped Jon. "And I'm leaning on that option. There has always been something suspicious in that bastard."

Robb was in pain. It couldn't have been Theon. Theon was like a brother to him, he couldn't have betrayed Winterfell. And yet a tiny mean voice nagged in Robb's head that it had happened.

"We must leave", said Thorin strictly. "It may still be dangerous here and I promised your father I'd look after you."

"No, not yet", Robb said. "I must find out the truth."

Thorin sighed deeply. "Very well. I would be lying if I said I don't know how you must feel right now. I wasn't that much older than you are now when Erebor was lost."

Robb nodded and said he would go check the godswood. Jon went back inside the castle with Ghost and Thorin stayed in the yard with his hand on the hilt of Orcrist in case it would be needed. Jon didn't take his time. He had found no one alive. At the same time he couldn't help wondering how this must have felt for Thorin.

"It's hopeless", Jon huffed. "Nobody seems to have survived."

"Jon! Come quickly!" they abruptly heard Robb's voice from the godswood. Very untypically for himself Jon startled the sudden sound, but immediately ran to Robb. His brother was sitting by the heart tree, holding Maester Luwin's hand. Maester Luwin was breathing uneasily but was breathing anyway and smiled upon seeing Jon. Jon felt something tightening in his chest. There was a severe-looking wound in Maester Luwin's chest and it looked as though he was dying slowly and painfully.

Maester Luwin coughed and asked with a hoarse voice, "Is Arya well?"

"Yes", answered Jon. "Arya's alive, in one piece and safe."

"Good, good", sighed Maester Luwin.

"What about Father, Lady Catelyn, Sansa, Bran and Rickon?" asked Jon and kneeled opposite to Robb.

"Your lord father is accused of high treason against King Joffrey", Maester Luwin told. "I know not whether Lord Eddard is still held as prisoner or if he has been executed already. Lady Catelyn, in turn, left to see him in King's Landing about a month ago. I assume she has either gone to her home in Riverrun or to her sister's in Eyrie after that. Soon after you left, King Robert made your lord father the Hand of the King and since then everything has been a mess, gods forbid. Sansa is still in King's Landing and is as good as a prisoner, but I think she will survive. Bran and Rickon…"

"Please tell us they are alive", Robb pleaded. Maester Luwin coughed and this time there was blood.

"I know not if they are. They ran with Hodor and a wildling woman named Osha, whom Theon had captured some time ago."

"This Theon", interrupted Thorin. "Did he betray Winterfell? Jon believes it is what happened."

Maester Luwin nodded. "And so unfortunately happened."

Jon moved next to Robb and took his hand to prevent him from completely breaking down. Maester Luwin smiled a bit and said, "You must leave. Winterfell cannot rely on its bannermen any longer. Rumour has it that the Boltons plan a rebellion. If they find out you're alive, Robb…"

"I can't leave Winterfell", wailed Robb. "If Father is dead or as good as one, then I am the lord of Winterfell. I will not abandon my heritage."

Maester Luwin coughed some more blood. "Do as I tell you!" he croaked. "Leave this place and look after each other. You cannot help your family anymore but you can keep each other and Arya safe."

Jon nodded. They did not especially have a place to go but there was no way he would leave his brother and sister defenceless. He pressed his hand on Maester Luwin's shoulder and swore by the old gods and the new that he would look after Robb and Arya.

"Go!" Maester Luwin ordered. Robb and Jon got up and left the godswood tearfully with their direwolves. Why had this happened? And how could anyone accuse their father of high treason? Their father was not like that, he couldn't have… There must have been a mistake. Robb squeezed Jon's Elven cloak while they left Winterfell behind.

Thorin remained by Maester Luwin's side for one more moment. Maester Luwin looked at him and asked, "Do it. Release me of my pain."

"I will take care of them", Thorin promised. "Robb, Jon and Arya will be safe with my people."

"Good", sighed Maester Luwin. "Now do it, I beg you. End this."

Thorin caught up quickly with the boys. Grey Wind was howling and Ghost was restless. They hadn't made it very far but Thorin was pleased to see they were heading back to the portal.

"What kept you?" asked Jon with a thick voice.

"I gave a promise to a dying man", answered Thorin. "To be sure it was the same I gave your father, only with an addition."

"And Maester Luwin?"

"He left painlessly and in peace."

Jon and Robb knew from Thorin's tone what he meant, but neither of them asked for more details. They had to make it to Arya, tell her what had happened and then think of their future. Grey Wind was twirling under Robb's foot and looked about as miserable as his master did. Jon managed somehow to keep himself together, though not an easy task.

"Don't look behind you", Thorin said grimly. The boys and Arya did not deserve this.

* * *

Thalia jumped up as soon as she saw movement at the portal. Nobody, though, had expected Fíli and Kíli to come from it with Arya. The worst part was to see that she had cried. Arya hadn't cried at all during the entire journey, so Thalia's protective instincts woke up and she asked sharply, "Right, do I have to commit a brutal murder?"

"That's very possible", answered Fíli. "Winterfell has been destroyed. Thorin told us to bring Arya back here."

"I suppose tea won't help in this matter", said Bilbo. The Hobbits were fond of fixing things with a cup of tea and maybe with a blueberry cupcake or a piece of cake, but there was no way any of those things could've fixed a loss like this. Arya sniffed and shook her head to confirm Bilbo's words.

Kíli lifter Arya up into his lap carefully and sat with her on a trunk nearby. Arya didn't seem to pay attention to it otherwise than by clutching his coat and refusing to let go. To be honest Kíli hardly would've let her go anyway. He'd never seen anyone so miserable in all his life.

"What about Thorin and the lads?" Bilbo asked Fíli.

"They'll be right behind us", answered Fíli. "I suppose they're looking for survivors and trying to find out what happened."

Bilbo gave an absentminded nod. He did trust Thorin, Jon and Robb, but he just couldn't help worrying about them. Ruins were dangerous places, Bilbo knew it from experience. By the gods, he had seen the city of Dale and even been to Erebor when it still had been in ruins. Still, he did whatever he could to hide his worry. Arya was more important now.

Nymeria poked Bilbo's hand with her muzzle and whimpered a bit. Bilbo scratched the back of her neck and muttered, "I know, Nymeria, I know. I'm worried too." Nymeria's eyes were like two moons just about to cry.

Thalia was nibbling her chain bracelet angrily. It hurt her to see Arya so devastated, so in her mind she started to plan a very cruel and brutal murder, which would be directed at the idiot who had caused this misery. No one would make Arya cry like that and live to tell the tale. Thalia owed Arya that much.

Meanwhile Gandalf discussed the future with Balin, Glóin and Dori. Arya, Jon and Robb needed a new home. Balin announced instantly that the children would move to Erebor and live there until they all came of age and became old enough to reclaim Winterfell. Dori and Glóin agreed. The Dwarves weren't known to abandon children in need anyway, no matter their race.

"So I can trust that they will be fine?" Gandalf checked.

"Absolutely", answered Balin. "And if they do not find Erebor to their taste, the city of Dale has been recently rebuilt apart from the last minor details and I should believe Bard to look after them if need be."

Arya heard this and said with a thick voice, "I wanna go home."

"Oh, Arya, I know", Balin sighed. "It just cannot happen right now."

Kíli wrapped his arms tighter around Arya. "Erebor's a mighty fine place", he said. "Right now it may not feel like a home even as a thought, but maybe with some time…"

"Home", Arya sniffed and pressed herself against Kíli as if to seek safety.

"By Mahal, where the hell are those three dawdling?" chuffed Dwalin. He'd hardly even said these words, when Thorin, who was grasping his arm, Robb and Jon appeared from the portal and told Gandalf to close it immediately. Nymeria, Grey Wind and Ghost were surprisingly enthusiastic when greeting each other.

"Right, who do I have to kill?" Thalia asked straightaway. "Nobody will make Arya cry like that and survive as long as I draw breath."

"Who did it?" asked Arya. Robb and Jon felt a nasty twinge as they saw her bloodshot eyes.

Jon took a couple of breaths and said, "Thalia, you'll have to get in the line, because I'm going to commit some murders when I go back."

"Who was it?" Arya repeated.

"It – it was Theon – _fucking_ – Greyjoy", Robb spat. "And what Jon is referring to: we had to run away from who we think were Theon's minions. They had no banners or sigils."

"Are you alright?" Bilbo wanted to know. He automatically ignored Robb's cursing. Thorin grunted something incoherent as an answer and was still grasping his left arm that seemed to be bleeding.

"One of those arseholes slashed Thorin's arm when he tried to give us lead", Jon explained. "It was a good try, but…"

"Give me your arm, Thorin", ordered Thalia. "Or pull the sleeve out of the way first so I can see how much damage there is."

"I cannot believe I made such a beginner's mistake. I looked at the wrong direction – I must be getting rusty", Thorin growled and sat next to Kíli and Arya on the trunk. The wound wasn't very deep, luckily, but either way Thalia deemed it would leave a permanent scar. Thorin merely shrugged upon hearing this. Dwarves didn't flinch by some scars, on contrary, they were viewed as signs of courage and endurance, and they were just about as appreciated as thick beards.

"You were damn lucky, though", Thalia said after wrapping some gauge around the bandaged wound, so that no dirt would get into it. "This could've easily been a lot deeper."

"And thankfully it was not my sword arm, either", added Thorin.

"Well, that too", grinned Thalia. "Okay, I suppose it'll be better in a couple of days."

In the meantime Robb and Jon told Arya everything they had heard from Maester Luwin. Arya couldn't say she was too surprised to hear about Theon's betrayal, although otherwise the news came like a bolt out of the blue sky. Theon had always been sort of loathsome, and Arya had never really liked him.

"What about the family?" she asked.

"Fallen apart", answered Jon. "Bran and Rickon are missing, Sansa is taken as hostage in King's Landing and Lady Catelyn is either at Riverrun or in the Vale of Arryn."

"And Father?"

Robb took Arya's hand. "Father... Father is accused of high treason against the king. Maester Luwin couldn't say if he has been executed already."

Arya let out a small whimper and closed her eyes. "Yes. Father is dead."

"How do you know?" asked Robb.

"I… I had a dream of it a few days ago. Father was at the Sept, ready to be executed and right before… right before it happened, he looked directly at me and… smiled", Arya told them. "Father smiled and mouthed me the words, 'Be safe.' That's what he said. I woke up right after that, so I didn't see when they…"

Jon and Robb had seen and experienced so much during the past couple of months that this didn't really even astonish them. They were more confused by the fact that Arya hadn't told them of her dream before. It was unbelievable how she had been able to be so breezy even after such a terrible nightmare.

"In the future, please don't keep things like that inside you. Just tell us", said Jon.

"Well, I did think about it, but neither of you believed me when I told you about the song of Misty Mountains, so I didn't really feel like telling", Arya answered with a grim expression.

"Oh gods", Robb mumbled. "What are we going to do now?"

"Well isn't it obvious?" Fíli asked rhetorically. "You're coming to Erebor, of course!"

"Yes, or if you like, you could stay in the city of Dale, I think it could be managed", added Balin. "But you wouldn't be abandoned under any circumstances."

"We couldn't possibly", said Robb modestly. "We don't wish to intrude."

"Nonsense, without you those ugly Orcs would still have the map of Moria", Kíli stated. "This is the least we can offer as a thank you."

Kíli looked at Thorin as if to seek support to his words, and wasn't disappointed. Thorin said he had promised Maester Luwin that he would look after the Stark siblings, and he intended to keep his promise until they all came of age. He also practically called off any objections Robb tried to make. Jon was too sad and too exhausted to try to fight Thorin, and Arya just wanted a home. Eventually Robb gave up.

"Fine then", he sighed. "It's not like we'd have another plan or place to go, and our father used to say that when in a dead end, the wisest man gives up."

"Your father was a wise man", Thorin said. "It is settled then. Let's go home."

Jon lifted Arya on Grey Wind's back before they took off. It was a journey of a month or two to Erebor so they had time to get used to the idea of a new home. Maybe in time Erebor would be a home. They could never know what the future brought.

* * *

Right, so according to this headcanon of mine, everything that happens during this fic also happens during A Game of Thrones and A Clash of Kings (/during the first two seasons of Game of Thrones), but in a different order and at different times. So in this fic for example the Greyjoys see their chance to take over North when Ned goes to King's Landing, and since he's there he can't prevent the attack. The main difference really is the fact that what happens to Robb, Jon and Arya in the books won't happen in this fic.

... did anyone even understand what I'm trying to babble here?

There's gonna be some smut in the next chapter, be warned. And I also start my studies next week, so I won't be updating so often, but I try to update as often as I can.


	20. Chapter 20

And we're in chapter 20!

When I first wrote this, I'd promised my Finnish readers that I'd write some Bagginshield fluff after the depressing chapter 19. Well, things happened and somehow I ended up writing smut instead of fluff. Woops.

So, I give porn alert for this chapter (don't feel like changing the rating for one tiny scene in one chapter). I think you should be able to skip it if you don't like that kind of stuff. I'll also warn you that this is only the first successful smut scene I've written (and second overall), so I'm open for constructive criticism.

* * *

Chapter twenty

Where Thorin and Bilbo… You Know

**~..~**

Jon and Robb thought they had seen everything. For many weeks now they had assumed they wouldn't wonder anything they'd see in Middle-Earth anymore. They had now been on the journey to Erebor for two weeks and during that time they hadn't seen anything incredible save from a snow-white deer. And so their faces were worth seeing when the Company decided to take a well-deserved rest at Beorn's house. Thorin had forgotten to mention that Beorn was a seven-foot tall skin-changer, and no one else had mentioned the matter either. Robb was just about to jump from his trousers and Jon's mouth fell open when Beorn came out of his door, greeted the Company cheerfully and introduced himself to the Stark siblings and Thalia (who hadn't been astonished of anything in years).

"Well, did you get that map back?" Beorn asked from Thorin. Thorin and the lads had stopped at Beorn's also on their way from the Lonely Mountain to the Shire and explained the situation.

"We did, but the price was hard", Thorin answered bitterly. "Robb, Jon and Arya lost their home whilst they were helping us."

"Now that really is too bad", stated the skin-changer. "Children should have a home. What are you going to do about it?"

Thorin and Gandalf told Beorn of the plans to give the Stark siblings a new home in Erebor while the rest of the Company settled down. Thalia was so tired that she didn't even bother to take off her combat boots, she just fell straight on a bed in one of the guestrooms and fell asleep. Fíli, Kíli and Ori did the same, though Fíli first pushed his bed against Kíli's. Robb, Jon and Arya lingered for a moment to introduce themselves properly to Beorn and assure him that their direwolves knew how to behave. Beorn was absolutely thrilled of the wolves and immediately said what fine beasts they were. Grey Wind ruffled his fur and tooted his own horn so much that Arya burst into laughter. That, in turn, made Robb and Jon happy, because during the past two weeks she had hardly even smiled, let alone laughed.

"Good grief, you're all skin and bones, poor girl", Beorn exclaimed when paying closer attention on Arya. "Come to the kitchen and we'll see if there's something for you to eat. Did you run out of supplies?"

"More or less so", answered Bilbo who had just returned to the hall. He'd gone to drop off his rucksack to one of the guestrooms. "Nevertheless, Arya has got the most food of us all."

"In that case you're also coming to the kitchen", Beorn announced. "If you ask me, Hobbits need to be a bit plump and little girls should eat properly. When those things happen, things are in proper order."

Arya made a slight grimace at "little girl" because she thought she had grown a lot during the adventure, but she also noted she was very hungry, so the words kitchen and a good meal sounded tempting. Beorn gave also the direwolves some snacks, since they hadn't eaten well either for some time. In the kitchen there was a smell of some kind of a soup, which to Arya's eye seemed a bit suspicious at first (se it was strange yellowish green), but she tasted it anyway and realised it was delicious. There was no meat in it (as there wasn't in any of the other dishes there was), but it didn't bother her one bit. During the journey she had eaten so much meat that a break from it was welcome.

"The hollow spot in my stomach says thanks", Bilbo stated after a couple of spoonfuls (he, too, had ended up eating the soup). The rest of the Company migrated to the kitchen whenever they happened. Beorn said that there would be food in there all night, so those who now had gone straight to bed could come down and eat anytime they wanted.

"We can never thank you enough", Thorin said to Beorn. "Know that you're more than welcome to stay in Erebor whenever you wish."

"Thanks, but things get a bit messy here if I'm away for longer", answered Beorn. "Or on second thought I might be able to get good old Radagast to look after my animals. It's not like it wouldn't be the first time he did so."

While speaking Beorn patted the head of one of his grey dogs. The dog was very interested in the direwolves that had arrived and familiarised himself with Ghost. Ghost was absolutely thrilled of this new acquaintance and was soon wrestling with the dog on the floor. Not long after Nymeria and Grey Wind joined them.

Arya yawned. The day had been a long one. She thanked for the meal and then climbed up to the same guestroom where Thalia was. It seemed like it had been forever since she had last slept in a proper bed. Arya pulled her boots off and curled on the other of the beds in the room practically half asleep already. Nymeria followed her soon after and fell asleep on the floor in between Thalia and Arya's beds. Thalia mumbled something in her sleep before turning around. Arya smiled and fell asleep peacefully for the first time in a long time. Thankfully also her dreams were peaceful. In the morning she couldn't recall anything of them except for the blurred image of a dark-haired woman and a gentle voice that called her "my little wolf". Actually Arya woke Thalia just so she could tell her about it and ponder what it could mean.

Thalia was quick to make up an answer. "You want a mom", she said simply. "Or someone like one. And I can quite understand, suffering from such losses so young." Thalia let out a sigh and continued, "I do know what it feels like to lose a family member. My baby brother went missing when I was nine. I haven't seen him since, or even know if he's still alive."

Arya was surprised to know this – and also realised how little she actually knew of Thalia. Thalia hadn't really talked about her background during the journey; before this Arya had known only that her father was a god and she'd run away when she was very young. Other than that Thalia was a great mystery.

"I'm scared", Arya said silently. "I don't know what's happening to me, since I see weird dreams and hear mountains sing. A-and if Robb or Jon d-dies…"

Thalia hugged her. "It'll be alright, one way or another. Robb and Jon aren't going to get themselves killed anytime soon, at least not that I know of, so on that matter you can be calm."

They both sat in silence for a while until Thalia added, "'Little wolf', huh. That's cute. Can I use it?"

Arya made a face and started to smack the Hunter with the nearest pillow. Thalia let out a shrill scream that soon turned into laughter. Two could play at this game, so she grabbed another pillow and started a counter-attack. At some point Fíli, Kíli and Jon came to check what was going on, and without thinking any further they went to fetch themselves some pillows too and joined the fight. The fight went on a long time, since Arya was laughing again, and Jon didn't want it to end.

The screams of delight and bursts of laughter of the youngsters echoed throughout Beorn's house and managed to wake up nearly everyone. Only Glóin and Balin didn't seem to notice it, and later on they said they hadn't heard anything. The laughter was audible especially well to Thorin and Bilbo's room, and Thorin was far from pleased since he had to wake up so much sooner than he had originally intended.

"The sun has barely even risen yet", he grumbled.

"Just let it go", said Bilbo and kissed the Dwarf lightly. "At least Arya is laughing again."

"That _is_ the reason I don't get up and go yell at them", Thorin chuckled. "It's someone else's turn to be the cruel spoilsport today."

Bilbo grinned and kissed Thorin again before getting up. "Nature calls", he said and padded from the room. Thorin pressed himself against his pillow for a moment and pinched his arm to make sure he wasn't dreaming. Then he got up too and went to his rucksack to search for the map of Middle-Earth. For two months now he had been meaning to learn it by heart so no one could ever again make fun of his sense of direction. After searching for a while Thorin's hand found something that certainly hadn't been there the last time he had packed it. He pulled the item up and went pale. Someone – Dwalin, most likely – had put a vial of lubrication oil in his rucksack.

"This must be a joke", Thorin huffed.

"What then?"

Oh shoot, Bilbo was back. Thorin had meant to slip the vial back to the rucksack in secret so that he wouldn't have to talk about it. Now it wouldn't succeed even if he tried because Bilbo most likely had already seen it, so he sighed and said, "This." He passed the vial to Bilbo who didn't realise what it was at first.

"A vial of oil, what's so funny about –" Suddenly Bilbo understood what it was. "Oh. _Oh_."

"I know", muttered Thorin. "As said, it must be a joke."

Bilbo started to examine the label with a slightly interested expression on his face. The lubricant was most likely from the Laketown or then…

"Well well, your nephews have been diligent", said Bilbo after noticing the Elven runes. "If I were you I'd tell them off for stealing this from Lothlórien."

"Excuse me?"

"Did you suspect Dwalin again?" Bilbo laughed shortly. "No, this is from Celeborn's medicine cabin, I'll bet my head on it. Though I still guess Fíli and Kíli meant it as a jest."

Thorin would've immediately started to plan a cruel double murder (triple murder if it was ever discovered Thalia had been a part of this) if he hadn't been scared for his own skin. Dís' face, if she'd see her brother now, flashed in his mind. Besides, he would've told a blatant lie if he had said he wasn't interested in the vial, what came to its contents and its use.

Something about Bilbo's face made it clear that the Hobbit was thinking the same. He was still studying the vial with a slightly interested expression, but Thorin could've sworn he knew what was going on in his imagination.

"So, what do we do now?" Thorin asked as nonchalantly as he could.

"Well", said Bilbo in a controlled manner, "we don't really have to do anything. On the other hand it would be a shame to waste perfectly good lubricant…"

That was all Thorin needed to hear. He put the vial on the nightstand before kissing Bilbo passionately. Bilbo couldn't help a smile. He was very excited to see where the things were heading. He couldn't say specifically how many times he had imagined this situation in his head but the reality won his imagination hands down. It didn't take even half a minute until their clothes were dumped into an unformed pile on the floor. Thorin pressed his lips on Bilbo's ear and nibbed it lightly. The Hobbit ears were extremely sensitive to touch and it made Bilbo stir just the right way.

"Mmh, Thorin…" Bilbo sighed.

"Remember to tell me if you're hurt", said Thorin.

"Should I turn around?"

"No, don't. I wish to see you the whole time."

"Good."

Bilbo's sighs soon turned into loud moans when Thorin pushed his fingers coated with lubricant (that by the way smelled suspiciously like strawberries) inside him one by one. He had some previous experience in carnal pleasure but nothing like this. Bilbo felt like he was floating somewhere high, and he knew he wouldn't last for long. Thorin was in the exact same state. His original plan had been moving on slowly, this being their first time and all, but understandably it did not work out the way he had hoped, since Bilbo was squirming right in front of him and moaning his name with such pleasure. Thorin kissed Bilbo's neck while pulling his fingers out of the Hobbit's hole. Bilbo let out a huff of objection.

"Be at peace, _uzayang_", Thorin managed. "We are in no hurry."

Bilbo snorted, and actually Thorin didn't believe in his words either. The truth was that neither of them was going to last for long, so Thorin coated his cock with the lubricant and slid inside Bilbo as slowly as he could. This part usually hurt a bit, and Thorin did not wish to hurt Bilbo more than what was necessary in this kind of action.

It did hurt, but only for a moment, and very soon the pain ceased and only pure pleasure remained. And on the top of everything it felt so right. Bilbo's breaths got shallow when Thorin started to thrust, lightly at first and then at increased pace. The both of them had trouble controlling the volume of their voices, and in the middle of their passion they paid no notice how the door of the room opened, was open for about five seconds and then closed again slowly. Bilbo tried to wrap his legs around Thorin's waist, but it was as if they had turned into lead, they felt so heavy.

"Bilbo", Thorin breathed, his eyes darkened with lust. "You don't know… what you're doing to me."

"I can guess", answered Bilbo breathlessly. He somehow managed to tangle his fingers into Thorin's hair before he reached his climax and came with a loud scream all over his and Thorin's bellies. Thorin gave some more thrusts, shaking a lot as he did so, but Bilbo's warm panting on his face was too much. He kissed his Hobbit softly before pulling himself out and settling himself to lie next to him. They both were breathless and so very happy.

"Wow", sighed Bilbo. "It was… it was…" He couldn't find a proper word to describe the feeling, even though he usually was good with words, but Thorin understood.

"It truly was", said Thorin. "Thank you."

Bilbo granted his Dwarf a weary smile. "Next time it's my turn to take you."

Thorin smiled back. "I can hardly wait", he said honestly.

Meanwhile Fíli, Kíli and Thalia were sitting by the long table in Beorn's dining room in complete silence and absolutely shocked. Thalia had covered her mouth with her hand, Kíli his both ears, and Fíli his eyes. They hadn't said a word for many minutes after they had seen what it ever was that they had seen Thorin and Bilbo doing in their room. In the end it was Thalia to say out loud what they all had in their mind.

"What the hell did we just see?"

"Whatever it was, it was terrible, and I don't even want to know what it was", answered Fíli, whilst Kíli was repeating a silent mantra, "I saw nothing, I saw nothing, I saw nothing…"

Fíli sighed deeply and continued, "Well, at least they didn't realise that we saw… whatever it is that we saw."

"We're not gonna talk about this, you know", Thalia said strictly. "It's bad enough that I most likely got an eternal trauma in my soul. I don't wanna be reminded of it."

"I saw nothing, I saw nothing, I saw nothing…"

"Kíli, shut up", Fíli and Thalia pleaded unanimously. Kíli fell instantly silent but wouldn't remove his hands from his ears.

"Unbelievable", he muttered. "I thought Uncle would've taken that vial of lubricant as a mere joke."

Thalia's head turned at Kíli like a lightning bolt. "You what? Did I just see something that's definitely not suitable for anyone's eyes just because you and your brother – I think – tried to pull a prank on your uncle?"

Fíli and Kíli nodded sheepishly. Thalia looked like she had just swallowed three pounds of lemons.

"You idiots!"

"We know!" Fíli said miserably. "Now I understand what Mama meant when she said that the men of the line of Durin are total twats."

"Well ya think!" shrieked Thalia. "I swear that one day you two will be the death of me! Exactly how bloody stupid can you two be?!"

"You know, Thalia, you sound an awful lot like Mama", Kíli uttered.

At the same moment Nori and Bofur came to the room, so Nori asked straightaway, "And what have you lads done wrong this time?"

"Let's just say", Thalia said venomously, "that we saw something we're not talking about just because these two idiots pulled a very lousy prank."

Nori and Bofur shared a significant glance. They didn't have to be geniuses to know what the trio had seen. Bilbo and Thorin didn't really try to cover their actions by controlling their volume, on the contrary, actually. Nori was sure that everyone knew what was going on behind that door that morning. It gave him a twinge to even think how Dori must've reacted to it and how his brother was ever going to shield Ori after this.

Speaking of the devil, Dori and Ori arrived to the dining room. Dori seemed to be in outright panic but Ori seemed surprisingly composed. He sat by the table as if nothing had happened and asked Fíli to pass the butter. Nori almost burst into laughter when he watched how Dori seemed to swell like a bullfrog.

"There's been quite a lot of noise this morning, hasn't there", Ori said with a tone that one normally used when talking about weather. "Interrupted my sleep rather badly, I was so tired last night."

Fíli, Kíli and Thalia stared at Ori. How on earth could he be so calm when he apparently had woken to Bilbo and Thorin who had been up to some horizontal tango? Dori was wondering the same.

Little by little all the members of the Company managed to make their way into the dining room. Gandalf was smoking his pipe calmly as ever, and didn't seem to be bothered by anything that morning. Same could not be said of Dwalin who was grunting that king or not, if Thorin disturbed his sleep one more time he'd kill him. Beorn was greatly amused of all these reactions, especially that of Robb's. Robb was looking a lot like a tomato and wouldn't say a word during the entire breakfast. He sincerely hoped he didn't have to hear those noises ever again. Jon hoped the same, and also that Arya hadn't understood what was going on. Luckily Arya was concentrated on playing with a big bunny at the moment, which led to the fact that she didn't pay attention on anything else.

"What, do you have bunnies here?" exclaimed Thalia.

"But of course", Beorn answered. "The little girl seems to like them."

Thalia got up and rushed to see the bunny with which Arya was playing. A couple of more bunnies joined them and it didn't take long until they had stolen Thalia's heart.

"If only I could own one of these", the Hunter gave an enthralled sigh. "It's a pity that when you wander here and there most of the year it gets had to keep any pets."

"By the way, shall we move on today or do we wait until tomorrow?" asked Balin a tad abruptly.

"I'd recommend you wait until tomorrow", said Beorn. "It just started to rain out there some time ago, and it seems to me it'll rain the rest of the day."

No one had anything against the idea of staying at Beorn's for one more night due the rain. It was absolutely dreadful to trek in rain, they all had learnt that. Although when Bilbo and Thorin joined them later that morning, both rather flushed, especially Thalia became interested in the rain. She put down the bunny she'd been holding and said, "I think I'm gonna go walk in the rain."

"Wait up, I'll come too!" Kíli said and went after Thalia. Couple of seconds later Fíli decided to go after them and dragged Ori with him. He had a lot to ask from the bookish Dwarf.

Kíli and Thalia were sitting on the stairs of the porch and looked as though they were choking from the held laughter. Fíli didn't wonder it for a moment, actually. It was a way for both of them to get rid of the embarrassed feeling. Fíli and Ori sat next to the duo and waited until they had managed to calm down.

"Oh by the gods, it was awkward", Thalia managed to say before she started to squirm in laughter again.

"Now see here, it's not that funny", said Fíli.

"Yes it is", insisted Thalia. "This is the most rueful thing ever, mark my words."

"Why did I have to come with you?" asked Ori. "Not that I'd complain, I'm glad to be out of there, but still."

"I'm interested in how you're so composed now, even though in Azanulbizar you went all red and hid behind your journal", Fíli explained. It made Kíli and Thalia calm down instantly. They were interested to hear the same. Ori felt very uneasy of the whole thing but he decided to tell the truth.

"Well, there is this thing that I drew in my journal the day before we reached Azanulbizar", he said and pulled up the book. He always carried it with him in case he found something to draw. "When we were taking the break that day, I was bored out of my mind, so I let my imagination fly, and for some reason it happened so that… well, see for yourselves."

Ori opened his journal from the right pages and showed the pictures on them. Kíli instantly covered his eyes but especially Thalia seemed to be very interested in them. It wasn't every day that she saw well-drawn pictures of a Dwarven king and a Hobbit half naked.

"So you drew these before we carried out our plan", Fíli cleared. Ori nodded.

"At Azanulbizar I was simply embarrassed to see in real life something I had drawn in utter boredom."

"These are absolutely brilliant, Ori", praised Thalia. "They look so real."

"Would you like to see more?" Ori asked, pleased of the praises. He didn't receive them very often, since most of the Dwarves weren't very interested in arts.

"Oh yeah definitely."

Ori paged his book and showed some pictures he had drawn of the Company during the past few days. Thalia was flabbergasted. She hadn't seen pictures this fine in ages.

Kíli was still holding his hands over his eyes. "Are those pictures gone already?" he asked. Fíli and Thalia huffed at the same time and told Kíli to stop being silly.

"They were just pictures", sighed Fíli. "Thankfully."

"Do I even want to know what you saw earlier today?" Ori asked.

"Trust me", said Thalia, "you _don't_."

* * *

**Uzayang **= greatest love

Anyway, this chapter was a lot of fun to write. Except for that stupid smut scene. How bloody hard is it to write one sex scene, seriously? Took me weeks! Mahal forbid the amount of porn I had to read for reference... But when it was done, it was oddly satisfying (not in that sense you perverts! xD)

There will also be the day when I will write some hot sex on the throne. Already done bottom!Thorin to chapter 23 (oops, spoiler).


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